Struggling to trust boyfriend Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#1
My boyfriend cheated on me once and I took him back , he has a very disgusting past, one full of lots of girls . He deleted his Instagram and created a private one to reassure me that he’s changed and that he loves me , I know he loves me as recently our relationship has been going so strong but I’m just so paranoid . I always feel like he’s doing something behind my back , and I keep searching for things to blame him for . I just found the Instagram page of a girl he used to speak to but he claims he didn’t , and I just wanna question him but he’s asleep so I’m saving it for tomorrow , I just keep seeing the girls he used to follow or talk to on my Instagram and it makes me feel gross and insecure and I just have such bad trust issues I just don’t know what to do . Please help .
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paul514
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend cheated on me once and I took him back , he has a very disgusting past, one full of lots of girls . He deleted his Instagram and created a private one to reassure me that he’s changed and that he loves me , I know he loves me as recently our relationship has been going so strong but I’m just so paranoid . I always feel like he’s doing something behind my back , and I keep searching for things to blame him for . I just found the Instagram page of a girl he used to speak to but he claims he didn’t , and I just wanna question him but he’s asleep so I’m saving it for tomorrow , I just keep seeing the girls he used to follow or talk to on my Instagram and it makes me feel gross and insecure and I just have such bad trust issues I just don’t know what to do . Please help .
When someone cheats and the other person decides to forgive them, that’s what they need to do.

None of us can comment on the specifics as we don’t know both of you to a high level to give you anything other than general advice.

My current partner cheated on me about a year into the relationship.
I decided to give it a try and forgive her and we are together and engaged 6 years further down the line, I completely trust her and 99.9% of the time I don’t worry about her running off with another man.

It can work but it depends on the reasons the partner strayed and the personalities of the two people in the relationship.
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London090
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I can't advise you to just let all loose and trust him wholly after he's cheated on you, then on the other hand he will never truly feel happy with you if you're always on his tail and being paranoid about what he might potentially be doing behind your back. You're going to have to settle for something between the two, you don't need to constantly be checking up on him but just make sure that he isn't being shady or hiding anything, if you suspect something don't become Sherlock Holmes and start investigating. Instead bring it up with him and talk about it, if he loves you he'll be straight up and honest. Also establish the idea that lying hurts and if he wants your trust there should be the truth and only the truth spoken

I hope it works out fine!
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Anonymous #2
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Talking through it with him is the best thing. I know it’s cliched and easier to say than do but it genuinely sounds like he’s invested in the relationship and wants to change and you have every right to be unsure or insecure about it. Talking through through your doubts with him is the best way to be reassured about it or to ease any doubts.

Hope it works out well! X
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YaliaV
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The relationship is over.
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