It isn't being pedantic at all. It's straight up what the words imply. Microsoft has a website. Onedrive is an online product. It's like saying "get that Ford" and then being disappointed because they gave you a poxy little Ford KA rather than the Mustang that you meant. Say what you mean, giving vague advice is just poor advice and leaves room for misinterpretation.
I didn't provide a method of accessing Office Online?
"Microsoft's Onedrive is free and comes with 5GB of free space (more than enough for simple documents) and, unless I'm mistaken, offers all the usual Office programs you'd need including: Word, Excel, PowerPoint and OneNote"
What was that you said about thinking that people aren't so incompetent that they need handholding to understand? Might want to rethink that idea. It seems like you need a step by step guide to figure out how to use Office Online in Onedrive despite being a self-proclaimed "tech expert". I literally point the OP towards the product that allows them to access Office Online.
And finally, the good old cop-out. "oh they can just Google it anyway". Sure they can. They could've Googled this question as well, yet here we are...