Can someone give some honest feedback on some poetry I had just written?

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AngelaChen123456
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Report Thread starter 2 years ago
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MCR Global Health Society are very pleased to announce that due to popular demand, our annual Global Health Poetry Competition is back for a 4th year running 🖊
With cash prizes to be won, it's time to get creative and put pen to paper!

Deadline: Sunday 14th April
Entries to: [email protected]
Expert Judging Panel!

Topic: any theme, issue, experience or matter related to global health 🌍
Entries from past years covered such diverse issues as mental health, environmental health, personal experiences of global health, the WHO, international aid, disaster, health systems and deprivation, inequality, and more.

Rules: you must be a student in Greater Manchester, and three entries max allowed per person.

Best of luck!
Any queries at all, email or message us at any time.

MCR Global Health Society are very pleased to announce that due to popular demand, our annual Global Health Poetry Competition is back for a 4th year running 🖊
With cash prizes to be won, it's time to get creative and put pen to paper!

Happy Mother’s Day

It should have been the happiest day of his life

After years of trying he could finally create something

Deep and personal, just for the two of them

Tiny hands, puckered lips

So small and precious, juxtaposed against the rest of world


But there was nothing we could do
Said the doctors, overworked and underpaid
We have no equipment to deal with this mess
We’re sorry

It should have been the happiest day of his life

Yet he digs two graves

One for his wife

One for his son
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AngelaChen123456
Badges: 4
Rep:
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Report Thread starter 2 years ago
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Here is the actual poem:

Happy Mother’s Day

It should have been the happiest day of his life

After years of trying he could finally create something

Deep and personal, just for the two of them

Tiny hands, puckered lips

So small and precious, juxtaposed against the rest of world


But there was nothing we could do
Said the doctors, overworked and underpaid
We have no equipment to deal with this mess
We’re sorry

It should have been the happiest day of his life

Yet he digs two graves

One for his wife

One for his son
(Original post by AngelaChen123456)
MCR Global Health Society are very pleased to announce that due to popular demand, our annual Global Health Poetry Competition is back for a 4th year running 🖊
With cash prizes to be won, it's time to get creative and put pen to paper!

Deadline: Sunday 14th April
Entries to: [email protected]
Expert Judging Panel!

Topic: any theme, issue, experience or matter related to global health 🌍
Entries from past years covered such diverse issues as mental health, environmental health, personal experiences of global health, the WHO, international aid, disaster, health systems and deprivation, inequality, and more.

Rules: you must be a student in Greater Manchester, and three entries max allowed per person.

Best of luck!
Any queries at all, email or message us at any time.

MCR Global Health Society are very pleased to announce that due to popular demand, our annual Global Health Poetry Competition is back for a 4th year running 🖊
With cash prizes to be won, it's time to get creative and put pen to paper!
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