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I want plastic surgery but my boyfriend says I look perfect naturally

Hi guys,

I've always hated my eyes and my parents agreed that we find a plastic surgeon to create double eyelid folds. I also want to get my lips done just a little bit! (they are average sized in real life, but look kind of small in pictures). However everyone I've talked to about this have advised against it and say I'm pretty and these surgeries would maybe help if I was ugly, but I'm not (they think). My boyfriend is especially adamant, he says my eyes are so beautiful and piercing and perfectly shaped, and my lips are perfect too, and that my physical looks are a major bonus of him dating me so he doesn't want me changing anything. He says that even people who he has shown my selfies to, have said that I'm pretty and that he's "definitely punching" and that I should consider becoming an Instagram model since I'm too short to do real modelling.

Me personally - I don't think I'm hideous, but I think I can look better. I'm not sure what to do.

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Reply 1
Avatar for Bio 7
Bio 7
21
There is no point in altering yourself when they are such small changes that you don’t need. Your lips don’t need to be better for pictures as they will probably look wrong.
Being insecure about your looks, and disliking one thing are quite different feelings. For people who are generally insecure as you seem to be, surgery is an awful idea, you fix one problem, then find another one.. there are always things that aren't perfect.

For people who have one very specific thing they want to change, it's not a bad option.. it can certainly help people feel more confident, but it's a lazy persons fix, it works sure, but it's not as fulfilling or meaningful as doing things the hard way: learning to love yourself for everything, inperfections and all, and in life not everything can be solved or fixed or done in the exact what you want, some things just have to be accepted as they are

Learning that lesson will make you happy for far longer, because no amount of surgery can reverse aging, you will become less perfect over time, we all do, your better accepting it now, then avoiding it with surgery now, and having to confront it later when there is nothing you can do
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 3
Avatar for Edcrown
Edcrown
9
Don't go that route, I am sure you look fine the way you are.
You want surgery to look better in photos? most people just add a filter.
Reply 5
Avatar for mgi
mgi
20
Original post by pearlastound
Hi guys,

I've always hated my eyes and my parents agreed that we find a plastic surgeon to create double eyelid folds. I also want to get my lips done just a little bit! (they are average sized in real life, but look kind of small in pictures). However everyone I've talked to about this have advised against it and say I'm pretty and these surgeries would maybe help if I was ugly, but I'm not (they think). My boyfriend is especially adamant, he says my eyes are so beautiful and piercing and perfectly shaped, and my lips are perfect too, and that my physical looks are a major bonus of him dating me so he doesn't want me changing anything. He says that even people who he has shown my selfies to, have said that I'm pretty and that he's "definitely punching" and that I should consider becoming an Instagram model since I'm too short to do real modelling.

Me personally - I don't think I'm hideous, but I think I can look better. I'm not sure what to do.


Stay as you are and love yourself. Its cheaper and lasts well into your senior years unlike plastic surgery!
how can we judge if you don't have any pic?
Original post by pearlastound
Hi guys,

I've always hated my eyes and my parents agreed that we find a plastic surgeon to create double eyelid folds. I also want to get my lips done just a little bit! (they are average sized in real life, but look kind of small in pictures). However everyone I've talked to about this have advised against it and say I'm pretty and these surgeries would maybe help if I was ugly, but I'm not (they think). My boyfriend is especially adamant, he says my eyes are so beautiful and piercing and perfectly shaped, and my lips are perfect too, and that my physical looks are a major bonus of him dating me so he doesn't want me changing anything. He says that even people who he has shown my selfies to, have said that I'm pretty and that he's "definitely punching" and that I should consider becoming an Instagram model since I'm too short to do real modelling.

Me personally - I don't think I'm hideous, but I think I can look better. I'm not sure what to do.
Reply 7
Avatar for Zarek
Zarek
21
Don't do it. Quite apart from everyone says you're fine which is undoubtedly true, plastic surgery always looks totally weird. It's a bonkers thing to do.
You look beautiful the way you are. Plastic surgery will change who you are(I'm against plastic surgery) I think you should only ever do it of its really needed, say someone has gotten bullied for their appearance so much. I think you're boyfriend is right. Keep him. He loves you for being you, it must hurt for him to see you hating yourself so much you want to change .Love yourself. You're gorgeous the way you are. You've been created the way you are for a reason. Don't hate yourself. No one is perfect anyway. I struggle with my looks a lot. But I wouldn't want to change my appearance with plastic surgery .your eyes and lips are fine, there's no reason to change them! X☺️
Ew don't get plastic surgery
If you get plastic surgery he won't be able to recycle you later but you risk being dumped in the ocean. Do you want dead turtles on your conscience?
Original post by pearlastound
Hi guys,

I've always hated my eyes and my parents agreed that we find a plastic surgeon to create double eyelid folds. I also want to get my lips done just a little bit! (they are average sized in real life, but look kind of small in pictures). However everyone I've talked to about this have advised against it and say I'm pretty and these surgeries would maybe help if I was ugly, but I'm not (they think). My boyfriend is especially adamant, he says my eyes are so beautiful and piercing and perfectly shaped, and my lips are perfect too, and that my physical looks are a major bonus of him dating me so he doesn't want me changing anything. He says that even people who he has shown my selfies to, have said that I'm pretty and that he's "definitely punching" and that I should consider becoming an Instagram model since I'm too short to do real modelling.

Me personally - I don't think I'm hideous, but I think I can look better. I'm not sure what to do.


I used to be just like you, people would often comment about me being attractive, but I always just figured they were just trying to be nice or something, because when I looked in the mirror I thought I was pretty average looking. I'm a guy btw and sometimes I'd get attention from girls who I thought were very attractive and I always kinda wondered why the would come up to me, that maybe they too were just being nice But one day something just sorta clicked and the thought finally occurred that maybe all these people aren't just being nice, as I realised that I've never actually seen someone who I considered unattractive being complimented like this, that maybe I was as attractive as they said. Since that day when I look in the mirror I see a good looking guy looking back at me, and I've never doubted it. Maybe it's time you starting listening to the people around you, they not 'just saying' it. You don't need plastic surgery to make you beautiful, because you already are.
I wonder, what will you do when you've had the surgery and the government have either banned plastic altogether or start taxing it heavily?
The reality is plastic surgery is simply changing your external - nothing on the inside is changing save for maybe your perception of yourself. It's superficial and not necessarily such a big deal that everyone is making it out to be. I have a couple of friends who did major plastic surgery (double eyelids, liposuction, boobs, nose, lips) and they are so happy about it although maintenance is a bit tough.

I personally don't want plastic surgery for myself, because the things I'm not 100% happy about don't bother me so much. But that's just me.

Try to think about it a bit more and see do your eyes and lips REALLY bother you that much? Disregard what everyone else is saying, just focus on what you're feeling. Don't worry about trying to please your boyfriend, he should be mostly with you because he loves what's on the inside anyway.

Maybe give it some time, like give yourself a time limit of one year. If it still bothers you, go and get the surgery. I used to be so bothered about my nose then over time I forgot to be bothered about it and now I just don't care anymore.
Original post by mgi
Stay as you are and love yourself. Its cheaper and lasts well into your senior years unlike plastic surgery!


PRSOM
Original post by pearlastound
Hi guys,

I've always hated my eyes and my parents agreed that we find a plastic surgeon to create double eyelid folds. I also want to get my lips done just a little bit! (they are average sized in real life, but look kind of small in pictures). However everyone I've talked to about this have advised against it and say I'm pretty and these surgeries would maybe help if I was ugly, but I'm not (they think). My boyfriend is especially adamant, he says my eyes are so beautiful and piercing and perfectly shaped, and my lips are perfect too, and that my physical looks are a major bonus of him dating me so he doesn't want me changing anything. He says that even people who he has shown my selfies to, have said that I'm pretty and that he's "definitely punching" and that I should consider becoming an Instagram model since I'm too short to do real modelling.

Me personally - I don't think I'm hideous, but I think I can look better. I'm not sure what to do.


you don't need surgery to look good, so many ppl around u already think u do. remember that surgery is permanent whereas makeup is not. also, ur bf sounds really sweet and he's so right too - keep him. and please, don't change anything about urself, u look the way u look for a reason xxxx
pearlastound, do what you want. It's your body and your money. You do whatever you like with it.

You will have to live with your face for the rest of your life. Chances are, you won't live with your boyfriend for the rest of your life. So if you want to go ahead and do it and he doesn't; you should go ahead. Fill your boots.

One thing to be aware of is that current cosmetic surgery is, as Bones from Star Trek would put it, low level butchery.
I ageee with your boyfriend.
Once you pop you won't stop.

See a therapist. If people in your life are telling you that you don't need it, especially your boyfriend (even more so that you have one) you actually look fine and your self perception is warped.
Original post by ZombieTheWolf
Once you pop you won't stop.

See a therapist. If people in your life are telling you that you don't need it, especially your boyfriend (even more so that you have one) you actually look fine and your self perception is warped.

so true I had 32A boobs, got one boob job 8 years ago and since then I've gotten 7 more, one on each birthday and I am thrilled!

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