I'm 23F and have never been in a relationship and don't think I can be in one at all.

So as the title says I'm 23 years old and I have never had a relationship. I do have sexual urges and sometimes do wish I had someone who loved me and someone I could love and be with but for the most part, I am satisfied being alone.

Sometimes I feel deeply lonely and feel that I can never show my truly self to anyone and have to hide behind a mask 24/7. My parents and friends have encouraged me to start dating and even though I would like to, I am generally repulsed by the type of men I am surrounded by and do not trust that I will be safe with them.

I honestly don't know what to do with myself as I would like to be in a loving relationship but am also repulsed by the idea. How do I decide what I truly want and also how do I deal with the instances where I feel deeply lonely and empty?

So you’re 23 and still single?
What kind of guy are you looking for?
Dating for the most part is difficult considering you actually have to like the guy before dating.
Showing your true self is essential since it allows the guys out there to see you for who you are.
Depending on what they see, the people attracted to you both in personality and looks will be the ones for you.
Find people through your hobbies. Make friends and go out and enjoy yourself.

Yeah I understand the feeling. I'm happy on my own atm, but would like to eventually meet a woman.

Now and again I do get lonely too, but I think this is normal for everyone.


Maybe go and join a club or something, you might meet someone there - will at least have one common interest, so might not find yourself 'repulsed' by them. No need tothough if you dont want to, but just a suggestion.

Yup 23 and single pretty much sums it up hehe. The thing is that I felt the same way when I was 16, 19, 20 and back then I'd always think "oh I'll get over this when I older" and I feel like, at 23, maybe I should have this figured out or at least made some progress but I still feel exactly the way I did at 16.

Honestly I just want someone who is nice and attractive (to me). I just have a really hard time making deep, meaningful connections because I just don't feel comfortable revealing too much about myself to anyone.

Thanks for the advice. I have recently joined a badminton club, maybe that will lead to something hehe

Thanks for the reply. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way. I've joined a badminton club, maybe that'll lead to something (but I'm ok even if it doesn't). The repulsion is such a visceral reaction. Perhaps because when I was a kid (12 ish) people would cat call and say nasty things to me (I developed early) and I was even groped around this period so I ever since then I'm just very distrustful of men (which I know is unfair and also a little bit mad considering these things happened many year ago). Sometimes I think I just need to be f***ed and then I'd be alright.

No problem

Firstly sorry to hear you were groped - especially at a young age It maks sense that this wouldve made you lose trust etc I wouldnt say its unfair or a little mad though.

Yeah, dont stress about meeting anyone through Badminton or anything else - you'll just feel worse! If you meet someone, you meet someone!

Have you spoke to friends about how you'll feel? Just because, they know you and might be well placed to try and help.

So as the title says I'm 23 years old and I have never had a relationship. I do have sexual urges and sometimes do wish I had someone who loved me and someone I could love and be with but for the most part, I am satisfied being alone.

Sometimes I feel deeply lonely and feel that I can never show my truly self to anyone and have to hide behind a mask 24/7. My parents and friends have encouraged me to start dating and even though I would like to, I am generally repulsed by the type of men I am surrounded by and do not trust that I will be safe with them.

I honestly don't know what to do with myself as I would like to be in a loving relationship but am also repulsed by the idea. How do I decide what I truly want and also how do I deal with the instances where I feel deeply lonely and empty?

So as the title says I'm 23 years old and I have never had a relationship. I do have sexual urges and sometimes do wish I had someone who loved me and someone I could love and be with but for the most part, I am satisfied being alone.

Sometimes I feel deeply lonely and feel that I can never show my truly self to anyone and have to hide behind a mask 24/7. My parents and friends have encouraged me to start dating and even though I would like to, I am generally repulsed by the type of men I am surrounded by and do not trust that I will be safe with them.

I honestly don't know what to do with myself as I would like to be in a loving relationship but am also repulsed by the idea. How do I decide what I truly want and also how do I deal with the instances where I feel deeply lonely and empty?

So as the title says I'm 23 years old and I have never had a relationship. I do have sexual urges and sometimes do wish I had someone who loved me and someone I could love and be with but for the most part, I am satisfied being alone.

Sometimes I feel deeply lonely and feel that I can never show my truly self to anyone and have to hide behind a mask 24/7. My parents and friends have encouraged me to start dating and even though I would like to, I am generally repulsed by the type of men I am surrounded by and do not trust that I will be safe with them.

I honestly don't know what to do with myself as I would like to be in a loving relationship but am also repulsed by the idea. How do I decide what I truly want and also how do I deal with the instances where I feel deeply lonely and empty?

I am the same but I'm 27

I am the same but I'm 27

You have to do a lot of self analysis to find out what really interests and motivates you. Look around, travel and see different cultures and people and see what you find interesting . Then you need to go out and socialise, get hobbies, get more interested in people. You are not

Work on yourself first. If you don’t want to date, then don’t. I think loneliness comes from within; you can be surrounded by people and still be lonely. Being with the wrong partner won’t cure your loneliness.

Thanks. I guess I really need to reflect on myself. I feel lonely and out of place even when socialising. Possibly because I feel that I'm constantly hiding behind a mask

I think everyone has to wear masks to a degree. Just focus on having fun and getting to know yourself. Take up new hobbies or do things you wouldn’t ordinarily do. I have social anxiety and I lived abroad by myself for a while, so anything is possible! You’ll find someone without even looking if you just mix with different people and have fun.