Pakistani girl marrying out of family. Watch

Anonymous #1
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Hi,

I come from an orthodox and Conservative pakistani family. Majority of our marriages occur within family, such as family friends or very distant relatives.. some that I don’t even know exist.

However, I am talking to someone on a serious note with the intention of marriage. However, we have not committed haram or progressed into a relationship. He wants to come speak to my parents soon.

I’m afraid on how they’ll react, I don’t want them to react absurdly, such as maybe get me married quickly to someone (by choice) ofcourse. I find it hard to say no in general, especially in regards to my parents’ happiness.

P.S. MY FAMILY WOULD NEVER DO A FORCED MARRIAGE, we ain’t about that life b.

Anyone been in such an experience?
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hi,

I come from an orthodox and Conservative pakistani family. Majority of our marriages occur within family, such as family friends or very distant relatives.. some that I don’t even know exist.

However, I am talking to someone on a serious note with the intention of marriage. However, we have not committed haram or progressed into a relationship. He wants to come speak to my parents soon.

I’m afraid on how they’ll react, I don’t want them to react absurdly, such as maybe get me married quickly to someone (by choice) ofcourse. I find it hard to say no in general, especially in regards to my parents’ happiness.

P.S. MY FAMILY WOULD NEVER DO A FORCED MARRIAGE, we ain’t about that life b.

Anyone been in such an experience?
No . Fortunately not. But i am glad that you are taking the initiative and introducing your potential partner to your parents rather than letting them do it!. This may sound odd to you but you are not responsible for your parents happiness; they are! You are, i presume, old enough to refuse to get married. Whst about your own happiness as well? You will just have to see how they react to your friend. Have you done much research into ehat is involved in marriage? it is ,in your case, a very big commitment to someone you may not know that well yet.
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Anonymous #2
#3
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Let him come and speak to your parents.

But beforehand maybe tell any family members you’re super close to that he’ll be coming or about him. At least that way it isn’t sprung out of the blue and your family won’t jump to conclusions and question your integrity.
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Anonymous #1
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I am responsible for my parents’ happiness as much as they are responsible for mine.

Marriage is a massive thing, I agree. However to do things kinda islamically, we can’t really drag this out.

Thanks for your comment xx
(Original post by mgi)
No . Fortunately not. But i am glad that you are taking the initiative and introducing your potential partner to your parents rather than letting them do it!. This may sound odd to you but you are not responsible for your parents happiness; they are! You are, i presume, old enough to refuse to get married. Whst about your own happiness as well? You will just have to see how they react to your friend. Have you done much research into ehat is involved in marriage? it is ,in your case, a very big commitment to someone you may not know that well yet.
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Anonymous #1
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My siblings are aware of him and my parents only know him as a good university mate.

It’s hard because he’s not even the same sect, caste(yes, they still believe in this) and the community. The Asian community will slander.
(Original post by Anonymous)
Let him come and speak to your parents.

But beforehand maybe tell any family members you’re super close to that he’ll be coming or about him. At least that way it isn’t sprung out of the blue and your family won’t jump to conclusions and question your integrity.
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