Will he come back? What can I do? Watch

Xgx2019
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My boyfriend of 4 years had a drunken 1 night stand 6 weeks ago. I chose to forgive him as he told me about it the next day and it’s the only wrong he has done in the relationship. We have met up a few times as we share a dog and things have been normal between us. He has been really hot and cold towards me. Last week he told me this split isn’t forever and he promises everything will be normal soon. A few days later he said there is a chance for us. I asked him today why can’t he tell me how he feels and why he keeps changing his word. He said it broke him when he seen how broken I was when he told me what he had done and he can’t see me like that again. He said he is scared of hurting me again. He said he loves me and always thinks about me but is so scared of hurting me. What can I do as I know we can work through this but how can I get him to stop being scared? We’re normal in person. He still has all of our pics on his social media and hasn’t spoke to any girls since the split. He has however been partying a lot since the split. I said to him today I was ready to have kids with him and he said if anyone is having his kids it will be me he couldn’t think of anyone more perfect to be the mum to his kids. No answers telling me to just leave him please as I have already made my decision that I want to give us another chance
Last edited by Xgx2019; 3 weeks ago
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mgi
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(Original post by Xgx2019)
My boyfriend of 4 years had a drunken 1 night stand 6 weeks ago. I chose to forgive him as he told me about it the next day and it’s the only wrong he has done in the relationship. We have met up a few times as we share a dog and things have been normal between us. He has been really hot and cold towards me. Last week he told me this split isn’t forever and he promises everything will be normal soon. A few days later he said there is a chance for us. I asked him today why can’t he tell me how he feels and why he keeps changing his word. He said it broke him when he seen how broken I was when he told me what he had done and he can’t see me like that again. He said he is scared of hurting me again. He said he loves me and always thinks about me but is so scared of hurting me. What can I do as I know we can work through this but how can I get him to stop being scared? We’re normal in person. He still has all of our pics on his social media and hasn’t spoke to any girls since the split. He has however been partying a lot since the split. I said to him today I was ready to have kids with him and he said if anyone is having his kids it will be me he couldn’t think of anyone more perfect to be the mum to his kids. No answers telling me to just leave him please as I have already made my decision that I want to give us another chance
You would have to keep talking with him and give him time. He is feeling guilt about what he did. Just encourage him and tell him that you have forgiven him and take things slowly.
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Xgx2019
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Thank you that’s what I’m trying my best to do. It’s just so hard because he doesn’t like talking about his feelings so it’s like he’s pushing me away.
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mgi
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(Original post by Xgx2019)
Thank you that’s what I’m trying my best to do. It’s just so hard because he doesn’t like talking about his feelings so it’s like he’s pushing me away.
Ok. But it is his life and he has to decide whether he wants to let you in or whether he should continue pushing you away and not telling you his feelings. He is in fact being unfair to you though because everything is hard on you. But it also depends on whether or not you will finally get emotionally tired of what he is doing. Support him but meanwhile don't forget your own happiness.
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