Creeped out by some of the likes I get on OKCupid

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Old Skool Freak
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#41
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#41
(Original post by londonmyst)
Let me be the the first girl to give you the news- there are female creeps as well as male creeps.
I've met several, ranging from blackmailers to sex assault liars and crazy bunny boiler ex girlfriend types.
I used to live with a female creep- she was exceptionally devious, a blackmailer and the way she destroyed anyone who looked at her the wrong way still creeps me out.

As regards guys, good looking guys can be creeps too and no sexual overtures are necessary.
Being a creep is reflected in their words, tone of voice, body language and actions.
The worst creeps I've ever met have been good looking, only difference between the genders was the male one pretended to be "nice guys" to make an effort to cover terribly creepy personalities.

The girl creeps either are openly thuggish or pretend to be shy/sweet as honey butter wouldn't melt/geeky.
Maintain the act until they get angry and the mask drops.
This happens to my friend on a regular basis, he is into drugs and only dates much older women who are usually married, seriously creepy or both.
When they start tormenting him, the phrase he uses is her first name followed by "she's another creep".
Yesterday it was "Bryony... she's another creep".
I think the female version of "creep" is a psycho lol.
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Anonymous #2
#42
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#42
(Original post by londonmyst)
Let me be the the first girl to give you the news- there are female creeps as well as male creeps.
This. I've also had the misfortune to run into some of them. Some threatening suicide, others wanting to effectively become a cuckold, and others just using me for money.
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londonmyst
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#43
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(Original post by Old Skool Freak)
I think the female version of "creep" is a psycho lol.
Not if she give you the creeps without appearing sufficiently threatening/utterly deranged/capable of inflicting serious violence.
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Old Skool Freak
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#44
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(Original post by Anonymous)
When I get a guy old enough to be my father sending me a like, I’m going to get creeped out.

When I get a Marilyn Manson look alike sending me a like, I’m going to be creeped out.

When I get a pervy looking guy send a topless picture showing his torso right up to the outline of his pelvis and almost towards his penis, I’m going to get creeped out.
Look,

If you're attractive and you want to portray yourself in a "sexy" manner, you're going to get all kinds of men who will acknowledge that in one way or another. Yes, you will get some young cute guys, but you're also going to get some less than desirable types like the older or weird looking guys. This is in the same way that if a guy wants to be a "pretty boy" or a muscly "boy-band" type, chances are they're going to get a few guys who like the look of them as well as all the girls.

It's a package deal. You can't pick and choose who finds you attractive. If someone could design the perfect outfit that would draw in the cute guys but repel everyone else, they would be very very rich and head-hunted by almost every designer label on the planet

If' they're just sending you a "like", they're just saying they think you're attractive. It doesn't mean they're necessarily thinking about actively seducing you. As I said earlier, if you're an attractive person, chances are everyone is going to notice you. there's no law saying you have to like them back.

OK, I kind of get your point with the last example, but there's nothing wrong with the others... if they then start sending messages about meeting up and their fantasies, then that's different.

What you find physically attractive doesn't change just because you get older.

I remember helping one old lady with her shopping (she must have been about 80+) and was talking and she said, "If I were 60 years younger lad..." I thought it was hilarious.
Last edited by Old Skool Freak; 1 year ago
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MidgetFever
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#45
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(Original post by ANM775)
So how would you like it if a guy made a topic on a forum one day complaining about creepy looking girls contacting him online because of a like you sent him?

what conclusions would you come to about said guys character?

does he sound like a decent person?

how would you feel if everyone started giving the guy sympathy and agreeing with him [like what is happening with the OP]



just something to think about........
Genuinely don't see why everyone's arguing against this point, its a fair argument. It generally is unfair to label someone as "creepy" for them not being conventionally attractive.
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ANM775
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#46
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(Original post by Old Skool Freak)
If someone could design the perfect outfit that would draw in the cute guys but repel everyone else, they would be very very rich and head-hunted by almost every designer label on the planet

One of these days someone might be able to modify one of those electronic insect repllents which use sound waves and make it so it sends out harsh ultrasonic sound waves only "creepy" guys can hear to repel them whilst leaving all the "cute" guys unaffected............ , but until that happens she needs to come to terms with the fact that not every guy attracted to her is gonna be her cup of tea.
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Waldorf67
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#47
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(Original post by ANM775)
So how would you like it if a guy made a topic on a forum one day complaining about creepy looking girls contacting him online because of a like you sent him?

what conclusions would you come to about said guys character?

does he sound like a decent person?

how would you feel if everyone started giving the guy sympathy and agreeing with him [like what is happening with the OP]



just something to think about........
Did I post photos/ names? No. So how in God’s name would I possibly find out a guy posted a thread about me being creepy? That’s utterly irrational.

And the entire point is, like I said, I wouldn’t post messages to men who were so much more attractive than me. Because I have sense, not to put myself into that situation.

So your argument is entirely invalid.
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ANM775
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(Original post by Waldorf67)
So your argument is entirely invalid.
I think you're the ones who's argument is clearly entirely invalid as you've now resorted to answering a question with a question....
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ChickenMadness
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yep -- you'd be surprised at the things you learn using these sorts of apps. As a man of Indian origin, I was pretty shocked at the number of women putting the phrase 'no Indians' or essentially saying words to the effect of 'Indian = block' in their description though (and I remember reading some article which suggested Indian men were the least desirable according to the data collected from online dating apps). I wonder if these women receive a disproportionate number of perverted messages from Indian men or if it's due to some other reason.
That's literally the reason lol. It's turned into a meme now because of how common it is.
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Waldorf67
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(Original post by ANM775)
I think you're the ones who's argument is clearly entirely invalid as you've now resorted to answering a question with a question....
Wow, what a well reasoned response :rofl:
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ANM775
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(Original post by Waldorf67)
Wow, what a well reasoned response :rofl:
Clearly if you had a decent argument you wouldn't have needed to dodge it like you did

Why don't you take those elite dodging skills of yours and simply use them to dodge all the "creepy" guys on dating sites showing interest in you instead of shallowly complaining about it like the OP
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(Original post by ChickenMadness)
That's literally the reason lol. It's turned into a meme now because of how common it is.
Just great...
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Waldorf67
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false
(Original post by ANM775)
Clearly if you had a decent argument you wouldn't have needed to dodge it like you did

Why don't you take those elite dodging skills of yours and simply use them to dodge all the "creepy" guys on dating sites showing interest in you instead of shallowly complaining about it like the OP
Well I obviously don’t respond to them.
I feel like you’re the kind of guy who’d make a really insulting remark to a girl who said she wasn’t interested on a dating site.
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ANM775
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(Original post by Waldorf67)
false


Well I obviously don’t respond to them.
I feel like you’re the kind of guy who’d make a really insulting remark to a girl who said she wasn’t interested on a dating site.
Girls on dating sites are not curtious enough to even do that.

I've only had 1 girl reply back that she wasn't interested and no I did not go off on her
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mgi
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(Original post by Oxford Mum)
I am so very pleased for you, mgi, but it was not for me. Many men viewed my photo but did not like my personality
The thing is internet dating is not easy. If a person doesn't like how you look or they don't like you for whatever reason that does not define you. Some people get lucky though. Maybe by persisting because some people on the better sites are fine.
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Oxford Mum
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I have tried the better sites eg match and classic fm. They are all the same format and the same liars. They are preying on vulnerable people. I heard of a friend of a friend who lost £70k to a scammer. Are you male btw? Because I think there are more genuine females than males on the sites. It also depends on where you live. In London it is easier because there are more people to choose from. Apparently if you are a person my age living in a remote area you have a 20,000 to one chance against meeting someone decent. If you meet someone and they give you their email address ignore it sans keep posting on the site . Use their email address to google them and find out the dodgy truth about that person. I was targeted by many scammers after my money. I have read from articles that they are often from Nigeria. So I ask these people if the have ever been to Nigeria. I never hear from any them again. Now if they asked me that question, I’d say what? What are you talking about? But of course they just scuttle away. I’m afraid I know all their moves, and my son and I saw viewed debunking them as a kind of game. I even tried out a graduates website with a picture of my avatar the Radcliffe camera on the front. It claimed it had brought many Oxbridge couples together. However looking at the profiles these guys could barely string a sentence together. They make tsr users look like geniuses. Also another female user was suspicious because there was no room for her entire type in her professional title. It was just a way for this one person to make money.
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Dunnig Kruger
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A friend told me about his sister. She had gotten divorced and decided to go down the online dating route. She met 350 men, all of them via dating sites, before she met the man who has become her boyfriend and fiance. I don't know how many men contacted her. It's safe to assume it's a lot more than 350. We are talking thousands!

The good thing about online dating is that you can meet a lot of people that way. The bad thing is that the average quality will be lower than the more traditional offline, friends of friends, social circle type dating.

My friends sister is, from his description, a relatively wise women, with enough experience of dating and relationships to know what she wanted in a man, as well as how to successfully market herself.
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He definitely sounds it.
(Original post by Waldorf67)
false


Well I obviously don’t respond to them.
I feel like you’re the kind of guy who’d make a really insulting remark to a girl who said she wasn’t interested on a dating site.
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ilem
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Remember lads, there's no such thing as 'creepy' -- there's only physically unattractive (or, rather, not physically attractive enough, as being average is nowhere close to being attractive and may still get you labeled as creepy).
Last edited by ilem; 1 year ago
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Anonymous #1
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Interesting. Thanks for that information.

So it’s a game of probability. A rather expensive one too. 350 dates!

I struggle with one date as it is because for the two online dates I’ve ever had. I had one date in 2016. I found that date to have lied on his profile. That put me off online dating so I deleted my profile from pof.

I tried Bumble last year and met up with a guy, computer wiz and very intelligent. However, I didn’t think we were compatible, he was even a vegetarian, and I’m a meet eater, and I wouldn’t be able to get past that as I want to share food delights with a partner. I also think values need to be compatible, that’s a big thing for me. He wanted to meet up on a second date, but I told him we weren’t compatible, but he disagreed with me. I felt he may get intense, so I put an end to the communication. That put me off online dating again. I must be such s snowflake.

(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
A friend told me about his sister. She had gotten divorced and decided to go down the online dating route. She met 350 men, all of them via dating sites, before she met the man who has become her boyfriend and fiance. I don't know how many men contacted her. It's safe to assume it's a lot more than 350. We are talking thousands!

The good thing about online dating is that you can meet a lot of people that way. The bad thing is that the average quality will be lower than the more traditional offline, friends of friends, social circle type dating.

My friends sister is, from his description, a relatively wise women, with enough experience of dating and relationships to know what she wanted in a man, as well as how to successfully market herself.
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