Do I come out at my reunion? Watch

Anonymous #1
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Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
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My high school is doing this 5 year reunion. They plan on doing 5, 10, 25 and 50 year reunions. I'm not sure why there's so many, but that's what I've been told.
I was bullied mercilessly in high school because it was a conservative Catholic high school and everyone thought I was a lesbian. And they were right. But I didn't date until I left high school because it wasn't safe for me to do so. They also nicknamed me spinster because they didn't think I'd find anyone willing to be with me long term. All girls schools are cruel places.
I now have a girlfriend, who I love very much. We've been together for over 2 years now. Today I got a facebook invite to my reunion in July. While I had (possibly more than) my fair share of bullies I also had some good friends I lost touch with (we all got new numbers at some point and about half my friends got married and changed their names) and I would like to catch up with them and I feel like I'm in a good place with my life right now.
Aside from my girlfriend, I'm not exactly at full bragging levels but I managed to go to a decent uni for undergrad, I've got a singing job right now that I love, I'm finishing my BA with a first and I just accepted a place on a very good MA programme with promise of a job after I graduate. I had always said in high school that I wanted to go to uni and be either a singer or a teacher and people made fun of me saying I'd never do any of that and now I'm kind of doing everything I said I would and honestly what bullied kid doesn't dream of going to their high school reunion with some stuff to brag about?
But the idea of coming out to the one remaining group that don't know for sure I'm gay is scary. I don't really use facebook that much - just for messenger, really, and even then I prefer normal texting - so I've not posted anything about me and my girlfriend on facebook. There's stuff on insta and twitter but I chose to keep my facebook neutral in case potential employers see it. There's no way they have more than a hunch about me. I want to bring my girlfriend with me but part of me feels like I'd be justifying their homophobia in some way, like since they bullied me because they thought I was a lesbian, if I confirmed I was, they would then feel like they were right to do that. IDK if that makes any sense.
The invite has a +1 so I could easily bring her but I need to reply saying if I'm coming or not. The date happens to overlap with the week of my grandad's birthday, so I'm going to be in town anyway (grandad's birthday is Thursday, the reunion is Sunday. I'm not ashamed of my girlfriend, or my identity, and I would really like to have her with me as a sort of support system, but I'm not sure if bringing her along is a good idea or not. She says that she understands the difficulty or figuring out whether to come out or not so rather than pressure me to decide, she's leaving it up to me.
So I am, of course, turning to strangers on the internet. What do I do? Do I bring her with me and come out or do I go alone?
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Dadslilsis1
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I’m a senior for my undergrad in BMS, I work as a peer mentor for my campus’ gender justice house- complete safe space for college students who are members of the LGBT community. You just need to do what you’re comfortable with. If you want your girlfriend to go, don’t let your peers ruin it for you. You never know how accepting people can become after high-school. I say go for it! Regarding your peers: You’ll never look like an ******* for being accepting, but you always will if you’re being hateful. ❤️
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Dadslilsis1)
I’m a senior for my undergrad in BMS, I work as a peer mentor for my campus’ gender justice house- complete safe space for college students who are members of the LGBT community. You just need to do what you’re comfortable with. If you want your girlfriend to go, don’t let your peers ruin it for you. You never know how accepting people can become after high-school. I say go for it! Regarding your peers: You’ll never look like an ******* for being accepting, but you always will if you’re being hateful. ❤️
I know my old friend group is okay with it. Half of them were gay anyway lol. I'm just nervous about inadvertantly causing a problem.
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Grizwuld
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What do I do?

I go alone? No no no no.

Do I bring her with me Yes, yes, yes.

and come out don't need to "come out" - be out - the way you walk, the way you dress, the way you talk, just be what you are.
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Memesman124
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you can come out to me on snapchat im a very understanding guy pls add asap :itz_tom2003
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threeportdrift
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(Original post by Anonymous)
..............
Everyone will be 5 years older and hopefully will have grown up by now. The real hardcore bullies will probably stay away out of embarrassment. The followers may turn up, but will pretend nothing happened and front it out as if they weren't bullies.

Lots of people/most people who are ghastly teenagers grow up at uni and are quite different as adults. Chances are the worst of them won't turn up until the 20 year reunion when they hope no-one will remember what gits they were when they were at school.
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