I want the world to stop so I can get off...

I just wondered if anyone feels like I do,that everything is all too much?Right now as my title says,i just want the world to stop so i can get off and I don't know what to do anymore.

In the last 6 years I have lost everything in my life,everyone I've ever trusted or cared for and I don't know how much longer I can carry on.I've lost nearly every member of my family,they have either disowned me or died and the only person I have left is my mum and we fight so much at the moment.It's coming up to a year since my stepdad died and I feel that I've never grieved for him becasue I've had to be strong for everyone else.I've suffered from anorexia for several years and it has almost killed me 3 times and i'm currently going through a bad and fast relapse.I have OCD,depression and bad paranoia about many things.I currently have therapy with a fantastic counsellor and have recently admitted that I was sexually abused by my father as a child.I have no friends left that really bother with me or contact me when I'm not at college.I lost my job a couple of months ago after I was sexually assaulted by one of my managers and when I spoke out no-one believed me.I'm at college doing my AS levels right now and feel like I'm running on adrenaline.I know i've done terribly becasue I can't concentrate on revision and as soon as my exams finsih next week I am planning to get into bed and not get out again.

I'm not looking for pity,I just need somewhere to write down how I feel.I seriously don't know how much longer I can carry on like this,I just want it all to end becasue I never see myself getting to a place where I can accept my past and move on,life seems so unbearable all the time and everytime I try something else happens.I have nothing and no one to live for at the moment and I just want a break from all the hurt...is that so wrong to ask?

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Reply 1

Josh145

Find something to put your life into and give it purpose. Something good.

Reply 2

Lets get close...

start praying u will see a change i promise....

Reply 3

∑ Я ĩ k ė s ħ ξ

My friend - you have gone through some hard times. But forget the past now. You will recuperate if you have faith in yourself. You will be a brand new man/woman soon. You have a whole life ahead of you and to be honest, you might not think so, but nature always has plans for everyone. Do not think about suicide, it isn't worth it. You still have your mother there for you and you can still enjoy life if you exert. But thank you for writing it down, its helps others to realise how much better they've had in their lifetimes. But I am sure you'll have better too. Whether your exams go badly or not - it will not matter or be your fault. You'll find a new job. And if you can't think of anyone to live for...live for the world. Be a charitable man/woman and help others when you are older. Nature never rejects those who work for others. Believe me - you will find happiness. If you have faith in God...pray sincerely.

Reply 4

Rei

Isn't this a girl? :s-smilie:

Reply 5

∑ Я ĩ k ė s ħ ξ

Democracy

If god wanted to help him, why would he have waited till now? :wink:

Suffering can bring people closer to God. It softens the heart. If everyone was happy all the time - who would remember God? :smile:

Reply 6

Josh145

Kill the religious debate. Its not for here.

I'd just say it sounds like you need something positive in your life.

Good Luck :smile:

Josh

Reply 7

34253

You have a nice long summer to get yourself together and have a good time. Do you have any friends at college you can spend lots of time with doing fun stuff with?

Reply 8

∑ Я ĩ k ė s ħ ξ

Democracy

No my point was, that guy said:

Which suggests lack of praying is resposible for the OP's predicament, in which case, God is horrible for punishing those who don't pray to him.

Well who knows...maybe we suffer on account of our own actions. Not to say it was the thread starter's fault in this lifetime. But neverthless this thread isnt about God or belief in him - its about the subject...lets encourage at least guys. Thanks Josh for that post :smile:

Reply 9

hannah_dru

Democracy

If god wanted to help him, why would he have waited till now? :wink:

Not wanting this to turn into a religious debate but it happens. Dunno why bad things happen but for some reason he lets things slip.

If you are partly religious then I'd be inclined to agree cos it'd give you something to live for and have faith in. You do have something to live for though- yourself. Your life is worth something. I know that life is evil and I understand wanting a break from the hurt but you have to carry on. You have to will yourself to keep going because otherwise things could get much worse. Its very tempting to hide away in your bed cos I've done it myself, but it doesn't do any good. Does your counsellor know the extent of how you're feeling right now? I would go and see him/her after your exams.

Reply 10

-WhySoSerious?

Think positive. You sound like a pretty strong person, you can work through this.

Reply 11

stuartrowland

I'm pretty rubbish with advice, so I just thought I would say that I hope it all works out for you :smile:

xxx

Reply 12

Lets get close...

Democracy

If god wanted to help him, why would he have waited till now? :wink:

If u ask for anything from god sincerely enough from the heart u shall receive it my friend .......... :wink:

to you to...

Reply 13

Lets get close...

Democracy

No my point was, that guy said:

Which suggests lack of praying is resposible for the OP's predicament, in which case, God is horrible for punishing those who don't pray to him.

Never say god is horrible............you can be subtle please never say that again so ignorant..........we were not put on this earth to live happy lives with no heart ache at all we were put on this earth to face opression of many kinds but we have to keep our faith in god and surpass it and those who do keep their chin up shal be rewarded in the hereafter....

Reply 14

∑ Я ĩ k ė s ħ ξ

Now, now. The thread is not about religious debate. As I said before - lets encourage the person in need. Keep it together people.

Reply 15

Lets get close...

well my previous message did have some encouraging aspects....

Reply 16

∑ Я ĩ k ė s ħ ξ

Yes, yes I understand that - its just the mods. But thank you ibbibeast for contribution.

Reply 17

!Emerald**Green**!

....i dont really have any advice to give apart from ...never give up....giving up is easy....its harder to try...and hopefully your efforts will be rewarded and you'll be happy someday soon. :smile:

gud luck with everything :smile:

ps, (thought of something) think of something to distract you...try finding a new job...or go to the gym?

Reply 18

Schmokie Dragon

Kill the debate, guys.

OP - there is very little I can say that could provide comfort. However, I hope you can find something to give you some purpose in life, and I hope you can be happier in the future.

Reply 19

Anonymous #2

OP, i've been in ur position several times before. When i just wanted to go to a place where nothin can hurt me anymore. Life can be a bitch.It's like volleys of problems r being thrown at you, one after the other. The very fact that you're still here and you've made it this far is testament to ur strength and ur character. Not many ppl can handle the stuff you've been thru.Everytime, i feel like jumping off. I start to think of the **** i've overcome, start being thankful for the things that i do have, the person that i've become.You can't change ur past. It's a part of you coz it's made you who you are today.And ur an amazing person. As for the fighting with ur mother,it will get better. Ur both hurting,try and put urself in her shoes and get her to see things thru ur perspective too.It's hard. Msg/pm email if you want to talk about it.