nic4338282
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I wrote this answer for a Christian practises question for GCSE AQA
"private worship has more meaning for a Christian than public worship"
Would there be any other views or quotes i could include? How could i improve this?

One may argue that private worship does have more meaning as it allows Christians to feel a personal revelation from God as they are able to connect with God on a deeper level. Perhaps, they might be able to feel closer to God through exposing their true thoughts on their own, which could help them to feel personally connected to the worship. Christians may support this view, as private worship can allow them to reveal their intentions for worship without distractions, for example thanking God for their own reason, asking for forgiveness or seeking God’s help. I believe this is a strong point as praising or honouring God privately at home seems way more intimate and therefore beneficial for a Christian as they do not have to worship God in a set structure in a church.

However, it could also be debated that public worship has more meaning because some religious believers may not know what to do when they’re on their own, so by having the comfort of other Christians with them to support them may allow them to worship God in a way that they can connect with God. Christians may support this idea because it is common for new members of the Church to feel less educated on worship and so doing this privately may not hold significant meaning. Public worship may involve listening to the Priest give a sermon or singing hymns, which holds meaning as Christians worshipping together as the holy people of God allows Jesus to be present and active. I think that this view is weak because following set Bible readings and hymns is not influential for how a Christian may want to connect with God deeply, and worship can take many forms. Therefore, anyone can feel close to God by honouring or praising him privately.

Ultimately, I believe that private worship holds the most significance for a Christian because public worship often follows set structures that does not allow them to connect with God on a personal level, and it limits them to how they can worship. Although public worship may allow Christians to unite, it does not hold the same meaning and should be done less frequently.
Last edited by nic4338282; 2 years ago
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turna127
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You definitely seem to be having a good piece - you've explained your points well, your evaluation at the end is always clear and concise and you reached a reasoned judgement!

What I would say to improve upon is that maybe you could add in some Bible teachings, for example, in Matthew 6 v 6 it says "But when you pray, go into your room and pray to your father, who is unseen" - which shows that private worship may be better. Also, you could maybe write more so the structure would be like private, public, private, public, conclusion but you don't have to do that structure, I would just say write a bit more so the examiner can see you definitely have "different points of view"

The last point is that you should try to avoid writing "I" but to be honest, there are some cases where it is acceptable to use 1st person and I have no idea when that is so don't mind it!

I'm not very good at marking so I won't attempt to mark but it is good. I hope I helped in some way
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nic4338282
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Thank you, this helped me so much! Do you have any suggestions for how i could conclude without using the first person?
(Original post by turna127)
You definitely seem to be having a good piece - you've explained your points well, your evaluation at the end is always clear and concise and you reached a reasoned judgement!

What I would say to improve upon is that maybe you could add in some Bible teachings, for example, in Matthew 6 v 6 it says "But when you pray, go into your room and pray to your father, who is unseen" - which shows that private worship may be better. Also, you could maybe write more so the structure would be like private, public, private, public, conclusion but you don't have to do that structure, I would just say write a bit more so the examiner can see you definitely have "different points of view"

The last point is that you should try to avoid writing "I" but to be honest, there are some cases where it is acceptable to use 1st person and I have no idea when that is so don't mind it!

I'm not very good at marking so I won't attempt to mark but it is good. I hope I helped in some way
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turna127
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(Original post by nic4338282)
Thank you, this helped me so much! Do you have any suggestions for how i could conclude without using the first person?
So what I would write is

"In conclusion, private worship holds the most significance for a Christian because public worship often follows set structures that does not allow them to connect with God on a personal level, and it limits them to how they can worship. Although public worship may allow Christians to unite, it does not hold the same meaning and should be done less frequently."

As you can see, there isn't that much change.

But if you're in the exam and you have little time left, don't stress about how you could make it work without 1st person - just get something down! It is better to have a finished conclusion than not having one at all. Good luck and don't stress too much about the 1st person thing
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nic4338282
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Thank you so much again, i will definitely use these tips in the exam
(Original post by turna127)
So what I would write is

"In conclusion, private worship holds the most significance for a Christian because public worship often follows set structures that does not allow them to connect with God on a personal level, and it limits them to how they can worship. Although public worship may allow Christians to unite, it does not hold the same meaning and should be done less frequently."

As you can see, there isn't that much change.

But if you're in the exam and you have little time left, don't stress about how you could make it work without 1st person - just get something down! It is better to have a finished conclusion than not having one at all. Good luck and don't stress too much about the 1st person thing
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DontWantToBeHere
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I think you are allowed to use I in the conclusion or at least that is the way I have been taught. For a 12 mark question, the paragraphs are written as 'For' 'Against' 'My opinion' so I think it is okay to use 'I' in the last paragraph but don't take my word for it. Hope this helps and good luck!
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Xola Maisie
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(Original post by turna127)
You definitely seem to be having a good piece - you've explained your points well, your evaluation at the end is always clear and concise and you reached a reasoned judgement!

What I would say to improve upon is that maybe you could add in some Bible teachings, for example, in Matthew 6 v 6 it says "But when you pray, go into your room and pray to your father, who is unseen" - which shows that private worship may be better. Also, you could maybe write more so the structure would be like private, public, private, public, conclusion but you don't have to do that structure, I would just say write a bit more so the examiner can see you definitely have "different points of view"

The last point is that you should try to avoid writing "I" but to be honest, there are some cases where it is acceptable to use 1st person and I have no idea when that is so don't mind it!

I'm not very good at marking so I won't attempt to mark but it is good. I hope I helped in some way
This has helped me so much with my essay! Thank you soooo much
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