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debate: do gay parents raise their children to be gay?

this is not my opinion! however, today one of my coworkers said that she believes that if a child is adopted and raised by two gay parents, that child is MORE LIKELY to grow up to be gay. obviously the statement is incredibly ignorant, and i called her out on it, but she kept backing herself up with stupid ‘evidence’ that didn’t even support her statement. she then went on to say that being gay is a choice and they won’t believe otherwise until i prove it🥴

i guess this is just a thread for people to argue their opinions on this because i couldn’t think of a single thing to back myself up earlier other than the fact that my coworker was just plain ignorant :/
(edited 4 years ago)

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Gay children come from straight parents, so it’s nonsense.
Reply 2
Original post by YaliaV
Gay children come from straight parents, so it’s nonsense.


exactly. her argument was that if two gay parents are raising a child, that child is More Likely to be gay, but it still makes no sense!
well straight people didn't do a good job raising their kids straight if they turn out gay did they
Reply 4
Original post by mpaprika
well straight people didn't do a good job raising their kids straight if they turn out gay did they


i don’t really understand what you’re saying here
literally what the person above me said, I was too lazy to read the comments before commenting
Original post by r028461
i don’t really understand what you’re saying here
it depends on a few things:

1, what causes people to develop their sense of what is attractive/sexual and what is not? That doesn't just mean gay/straight, but all of the forms of sexual and romantic attraction.

For me, I think its (like most parts of us) a mixture of our genetics, hormones/exposure levels in the womb, and our early-year exposure.
(All 3 of which are out of our control, and mean that you don't choose who you are attracted to)

the reason for me thinking its a mix is:
1, there have been numerous studies that have been able to show correlation between homosexuality in adults and early-year child abuse. That's not to say that all gay people have been abused, of course not. But if these studies are true, then it shows that early-year exposure, when your brain is still growing and forming at such a quick rate.. can impact your sexual preferences as an adult.
2, Genetics obviously plays a factor, as it does in most things - but I don't think its entirely the cause, and I wonder how its passed on.
3, There have been studies done, which to my knowledge show some connections between hormones levels in the womb, and a childs sexuality and gender as they grow up.

All three of these make up the idiom you are 'born gay' and you don't 'choose to be gay' - the second one is 100% correct, the first is mostly correct.

If that's right, then depending on the ratio of the three components, your parents, in making up a significant part of your early years exposures, could influence your sexuality to some degree. BUT that doesn't mean that having gay parents would make you gay, we have no idea what type of early year experiences drive what time of attractions later in life, its plausable that more exposure to homosexuality at a very young age could have some impact (but it would be very very small, because it would be a single part of a small cause of what drives your sexuality).. but there is absolutely no way to know.

So lets say purely hypothetically that it turned out your sexuality was driven 60% by genetics, 25% by your development in the womb, 15% by your early-year-experiances. Of those early year experiances, lets say that 60% are caused by your parents. That would mean that roughly 8% of your sexual preferences could be influenced by your parents.. but even then, if those numbers were at all real, we would still have no idea which parental behaviors or triggers cause which sexuality to develop, so whilst you could conclude that parents can have a very small impact, you could never conclude that gay parents have an impact of causing gay children.

even if you carried out a long-term study, examining the rates of homosexual children in gay and straight families, your results would quickly be invalidated by the fact that it could just be that children in gay families are more likely to come out, rather than actually be gay.
Original post by r028461
this is not my opinion! however, today one of my coworkers said that she believes that if a child is adopted and raised by two gay parents, that child is MORE LIKELY to grow up to be gay. obviously the statement is incredibly ignorant, and i called her out on it, but she kept backing herself up with stupid ‘evidence’ that didn’t even support her statement. she then went on to say that being gay is a choice and they won’t believe otherwise until i prove it🥴

i guess this is just a thread for people to argue their opinions on this because i couldn’t think of a single thing to back myself up earlier other than the fact that my coworker was just plain ignorant :/

Because it's like saying that two black parents are likely to raise a child black. Nope.If a child is white he will remain white.Hes not going to suddenly wake up one day and go " **** I'm turning black". Sexuality is inherent,just like race.Its not a thing you can change like religion or political belief and it's ignorant to think you can.
Too many people view homosexuality as a 'lifestyle' choice instead of a biological state. Epigenetics seems to be an area of relevance.
Nobody really knows how being gay even develops: we've never found a "gay gene" but being gay doesn't seem to be a choice either. Weird how people reckon they can then make statements like that based on a whole lotta nothing.
Uh really? I thought that was all homophobic myth that had been dispelled ages ago. Can I see some sources, please?
Original post by fallen_acorns
it depends on a few things:

1, what causes people to develop their sense of what is attractive/sexual and what is not? That doesn't just mean gay/straight, but all of the forms of sexual and romantic attraction.

For me, I think its (like most parts of us) a mixture of our genetics, hormones/exposure levels in the womb, and our early-year exposure.
(All 3 of which are out of our control, and mean that you don't choose who you are attracted to)

the reason for me thinking its a mix is:
1, there have been numerous studies that have been able to show correlation between homosexuality in adults and early-year child abuse. That's not to say that all gay people have been abused, of course not. But if these studies are true, then it shows that early-year exposure, when your brain is still growing and forming at such a quick rate.. can impact your sexual preferences as an adult.
2, Genetics obviously plays a factor, as it does in most things - but I don't think its entirely the cause, and I wonder how its passed on.
3, There have been studies done, which to my knowledge show some connections between hormones levels in the womb, and a childs sexuality and gender as they grow up.

All three of these make up the idiom you are 'born gay' and you don't 'choose to be gay' - the second one is 100% correct, the first is mostly correct.

If that's right, then depending on the ratio of the three components, your parents, in making up a significant part of your early years exposures, could influence your sexuality to some degree. BUT that doesn't mean that having gay parents would make you gay, we have no idea what type of early year experiences drive what time of attractions later in life, its plausable that more exposure to homosexuality at a very young age could have some impact (but it would be very very small, because it would be a single part of a small cause of what drives your sexuality).. but there is absolutely no way to know.

So lets say purely hypothetically that it turned out your sexuality was driven 60% by genetics, 25% by your development in the womb, 15% by your early-year-experiances. Of those early year experiances, lets say that 60% are caused by your parents. That would mean that roughly 8% of your sexual preferences could be influenced by your parents.. but even then, if those numbers were at all real, we would still have no idea which parental behaviors or triggers cause which sexuality to develop, so whilst you could conclude that parents can have a very small impact, you could never conclude that gay parents have an impact of causing gay children.

even if you carried out a long-term study, examining the rates of homosexual children in gay and straight families, your results would quickly be invalidated by the fact that it could just be that children in gay families are more likely to come out, rather than actually be gay.
As being gay seems to be influenced more by fetal hormones in the womb than anything else it's safe to say she's talking out of her ass. Nobody can choose their sexuality. What she probably really means is being raised by a gay couple would make a child more accepting of themselves if they were gay than a straight couple
Original post by r028461
this is not my opinion! however, today one of my coworkers said that she believes that if a child is adopted and raised by two gay parents, that child is MORE LIKELY to grow up to be gay. obviously the statement is incredibly ignorant, and i called her out on it, but she kept backing herself up with stupid ‘evidence’ that didn’t even support her statement. she then went on to say that being gay is a choice and they won’t believe otherwise until i prove it🥴

i guess this is just a thread for people to argue their opinions on this because i couldn’t think of a single thing to back myself up earlier other than the fact that my coworker was just plain ignorant :/
Me and my boyfriend both want to adopt kids when were older and honestly I don't want them to be gay. Life will be better for them if they aren't. The only thing that is bad with gay adoption is when boys are given to a lesbian couple or vice versa. Really, the children need to have a role model to look up to and they can't do that if both parents are a different gender to them.
People raised by gay parents are definitely more likely to be openly gay, but it probably wouldn't affect whether they're gay on the inside.
Original post by Asdqwezxc
Me and my boyfriend both want to adopt kids when were older and honestly I don't want them to be gay. Life will be better for them if they aren't. The only thing that is bad with gay adoption is when boys are given to a lesbian couple or vice versa. Really, the children need to have a role model to look up to and they can't do that if both parents are a different gender to them.

Someone being a different gender to you should not exclude them from being your role model, that is just backwards.
Original post by r028461
this is not my opinion! however, today one of my coworkers said that she believes that if a child is adopted and raised by two gay parents, that child is MORE LIKELY to grow up to be gay. obviously the statement is incredibly ignorant, and i called her out on it, but she kept backing herself up with stupid ‘evidence’ that didn’t even support her statement. she then went on to say that being gay is a choice and they won’t believe otherwise until i prove it🥴

i guess this is just a thread for people to argue their opinions on this because i couldn’t think of a single thing to back myself up earlier other than the fact that my coworker was just plain ignorant :/


I don't think there is a genetic makeup that determines someone will be heterosexual or homosexual. I don't think people are born straight or gay. There may be other factors such as socialisation that possibly can influence a particular sexual orientation, but I don't really know.

It would be interesting to see research on what factors can have influence in determining one’s sexual orientation.
Original post by Wired_1800
It would be interesting to see research on what factors can have influence in determining one’s sexual orientation.

There's a fair bit of research on it, but like all psycho-social research, it is difficult to interpret and draw definite conclusions from. Many psychologists and therapists have argued that sexual behaviour is often linked to early childhood experiences and minor or major traumas.
Original post by Fullofsurprises
There's a fair bit of research on it, but like all psycho-social research, it is difficult to interpret and draw definite conclusions from. Many psychologists and therapists have argued that sexual behaviour is often linked to early childhood experiences and minor or major traumas.


That is interesting. Why do some groups claim a biological link to sexual orientation? I would agree that sexual behaviour would be more psycho-social than biological i.e. so and so was born straight or born gay.
Reply 18
No they just dont teach their kids to conform to gender roles. The kids are also raised knowing that same-sex relationships are real, and it is normalized in their households.
Homophobic much?? We arent any differnet from straight people yannoe other than who we like to be in a relationship with

Original post by mpaprika
well straight people didn't do a good job raising their kids straight if they turn out gay did they

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