I like a girl and I am Muslim Watch

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Ruhab Dabeer
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#81
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#81
Yeah in the outside but not in the inside
Can't you give me a better suggestion to how should i tell her
Cuz I am too shy
(Original post by Zain_Ahmed)
If you actually did some research (took me 2 seconds), Zakir Naik says Masturbation is allowed in islam, not in Ramadan, but normally... It isn't ideal but it is allowed.. You're just making this up as it was very easy to find. the most Logical way to telling your GF is just to tell her... idk how.. just tell the truth.. Of Course you enjoy it.. why else would you have the urge to do it?
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Anonymous #1
#82
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I guarantee no girl will like you if this is how you are
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Amnz_02
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#83
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ur a teen boy why u being shy for go and confess ur fellings to her if u keep being shy trust me nothing will happen you will not get her go up to her and just tell her the truth Don't be shy be a men go to her

(Original post by Ruhab Dabeer)
Yeah in the outside but not in the inside
Can't you give me a better suggestion to how should i tell her
Cuz I am too shy
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The Wise
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(Original post by Ruhab Dabeer)
Hi everyone I got a little problem. I am a Sunni Muslim and I heavily respect Islam but there is a girl in my college who is also a Muslim and I really like her because she is a very nice person and her personality. I kinda have a crush on her but is this Haram to have a crush and I want to be her boyfriend though I plan to do this right after I end college.
But please help if this is Haram or anything or an advice to get close to her. In Islam it is essential to pass down knowledge so having a wife is essential.
My friend has a girlfriend who is also a Muslim and both of his parents and his gf's parents know they are together.
I don't want to be that lovey dovey or kissy guy
I just wanna be very close friends with her
So plz help!!!
Get married
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kekedoyouloveme?
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(Original post by Ruhab Dabeer)
Hi everyone I got a little problem. I am a Sunni Muslim and I heavily respect Islam but there is a girl in my college who is also a Muslim and I really like her because she is a very nice person and her personality. I kinda have a crush on her but is this Haram to have a crush and I want to be her boyfriend though I plan to do this right after I end college.
But please help if this is Haram or anything or an advice to get close to her. In Islam it is essential to pass down knowledge so having a wife is essential.
My friend has a girlfriend who is also a Muslim and both of his parents and his gf's parents know they are together.
I don't want to be that lovey dovey or kissy guy
I just wanna be very close friends with her
So plz help!!!
mate, I know so many people who do worse...

Cough cough me for instance...

I personally think there's nothing wrong in having a boyfriend or girlfriend, I mean once you're at a mature age you're old enough to make your own decisions you know, eventually you have to experience love, and be able to understand your likes and dislikes because knowing that and knowing who you are compatible with and work well with would really help in the long run. I am a Muslim too so I understand where you're coming from but personally, when you're old enough and mature enough to interact with people and learn within a relationship then what is the problem?

Obviously, sex before marriage is still an issue, but as long as you keep things pure, then I don't see what's the harm in a relationship anyway
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mgi
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(Original post by The Wise)
Get married
Are you actually married yourself? Dodgy advice!
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searching123job
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It is not a sin to have a crush. These are normal and expected.

However, know that there is no such thing as being close to a non-mahram. No such thing as a relationship outside marriage. Either she is your wife, or she is a non-mahram, to whom you must respect all the guidelines in terms of interaction, etiquette, character etc.

One of the mercies of the shari’ah is that there is a sound and pure alternative for every prohibited thing. In this case, it is marriage. But since you are still yet to muster up the courage to bring this up, how can you sustain a wife and fulfil all the obligations that are due upon you?

If marriage is not a possibility, forget about her. It’s as simple as that, there is no alternative. Stop wasting your time on her. And do not listen to a lot of the ignorant comments made in this thread about pursuing a relationship under the guise of a “sincere” intention and whatnot.
Last edited by searching123job; 1 month ago
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searching123job
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Yes, the real Islam, where you can manipulate the religion to your taste, whims and own desires.

There is no justification for a relationship beyond the confines of marriage. Either a woman is your wife or she is a non-mahram. And if Allah swt commanded us to lower our gaze, how can you even think a pre-marital relationship would be permissible? Madness.
(Original post by nha.)
Couldn’t agree more.
That’s why I stopped arguing with such people. Tbh I’m glad there are people who still understand the real Islam
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Anonymous #7
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@golddInar finally someone giving the brother real advice !
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Nxfisax
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I’m also a sunni Muslim girl and I’m just thinking even if you did ask out the sister ( which I won’t advise as in islam we are not allowed gfs /bfs) maybe she’d say no as she might be religious. I don’t advise you ask the girl out but instead lower your gaze brother. If your serious about this and this isn’t just a minor crush then wait in the future if it is meant to be then allah swt will allow it to happen .
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mgi
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(Original post by searching123job)
It is not a sin to have a crush. These are normal and expected.

However, know that there is no such thing as being close to a non-mahram. No such thing as a relationship outside marriage. Either she is your wife, or she is a non-mahram, to whom you must respect all the guidelines in terms of interaction, etiquette, character etc.

One of the mercies of the shari’ah is that there is a sound and pure alternative for every prohibited thing. In this case, it is marriage. But since you are still yet to muster up the courage to bring this up, how can you sustain a wife and fulfil all the obligations that are due upon you?

If marriage is not a possibility, forget about her. It’s as simple as that, there is no alternative. Stop wasting your time on her. And do not listen to a lot of the ignorant comments made in this thread about pursuing a relationship under the guise of a “sincere” intention and whatnot.
The marriage advice is ignorant and profoundly stupid and often given by muslims with little or no sex or marriage experience. That is the real ignorance. Another muslim misrepresenting Islam.
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searching123job
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Please tell me what I have misrepresented, oh noble scholar
(Original post by mgi)
The marriage advice is ignorant and profoundly stupid and often given by muslims with little or no sex or marriage experience. That is the real ignorance. Another muslim misrepresenting Islam.
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mgi
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(Original post by Nxfisax)
I’m also a sunni Muslim girl and I’m just thinking even if you did ask out the sister ( which I won’t advise as in islam we are not allowed gfs /bfs) maybe she’d say no as she might be religious. I don’t advise you ask the girl out but instead lower your gaze brother. If your serious about this and this isn’t just a minor crush then wait in the future if it is meant to be then allah swt will allow it to happen .
She may also not be religious. These issues are often just clashes between two cultures really. Western culture does not mind premarital dating and that's fine. Islam is just a religion. It is not better or worse than any other religion. It is your choice as to what you do with your life. I do not personally believe in following any religion that talks about sin, judgement and hell or seems to encourage people to deny their own natural hormonal desires for sexual and emotional intimacy. I have also noticed that there are not many married muslim women on these threads. I think they would know the reality of being pressured into marriage, being virgins before marriage, sexual intercourse etc but they are not the one's speaking on these threads. Would they advise fellow muslims to get married to solve sex problems? I suspect not!
Last edited by mgi; 1 month ago
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searching123job
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Stop misrepresenting my faith.

It does not deny their own natural desires. What it actually does is channel these desires in the right way, and that is within marriage. Intimacy with your spouse is also encouraged.

Of course, one should not just rush into marriage for that reason. It is a lifelong commitment that requires understanding and maturity. Since OP doesn’t seem to be displaying either, marriage does not seem to be on the cards. Therefore, the only thing he can do is remain steadfast, develop into the man be wants to become and then marry when the time is better for him to do so.
(Original post by mgi)
She may also not be religious. These issues are often just clashes between two cultures really. Western culture does not mind premarital dating and that's fine. Islam is just a religion. It is not better or worse than any other religion. It is your choice as to what you do with your life. I do not personally believe in following any religion that talks about sin, judgement and hell or seems to encourage people to deny their own natural hormonal desires for sexual and emotional intimacy. I have also noticed that there are not many married muslim women on these threads. I think they would know the reality of being pressured into marriage, being virgins before marriage, sexual intercourse etc but they are not the one's speaking on these threads. Would they advise fellow muslims to get married to solve sex problems? I suspect not!
Last edited by searching123job; 1 month ago
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arhamfaisal
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(Original post by Ruhab Dabeer)
Hi everyone I got a little problem. I am a Sunni Muslim and I heavily respect Islam but there is a girl in my college who is also a Muslim and I really like her because she is a very nice person and her personality. I kinda have a crush on her but is this Haram to have a crush and I want to be her boyfriend though I plan to do this right after I end college.
But please help if this is Haram or anything or an advice to get close to her. In Islam it is essential to pass down knowledge so having a wife is essential.
My friend has a girlfriend who is also a Muslim and both of his parents and his gf's parents know they are together.
I don't want to be that lovey dovey or kissy guy
I just wanna be very close friends with her
So plz help!!!
Refer to Islamic scholars man not us, this generation doesn't know the first thing about religion, not that we don't know anything. Its just that we don't know too much detail regarding these matters. Didn't mean to offend anybody. But yea I think its best if u ask scholars or tell your parents about it.
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mgi
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(Original post by searching123job)
Stop misrepresenting my faith.

It does not deny their own natural desires. What it actually does is channel these desires in the right way, and that is within marriage. Intimacy with your spouse is also encouraged.

Of course, one should not just rush into marriage for that reason. It is a lifelong commitment that requires understanding and maturity. Since OP doesn’t seem to be displaying either, marriage does not seem to be on the cards. Therefore, the only thing he can do is remain steadfast, develop into the man be wants to become and then marry when the time is better for him to do so.
Yes exactly and his decision does not necessarily have to be Islamic for it to work. Channelling desires in the right way by getting married? which part of the Quran teaches you this idea?Other faiths can do this as well. I notice you did not address my point about married muslim women as opposed to virgin unmarried muslim giving advice on these threads? Have you also checked any data or evidence about what married muslim women regard as a successful fulfilled marriage and whether that's what they are getting? A lot of dubious advice is given by some who have little knowledge of the real issues .
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Anonymous #1
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holy **** leave your religion
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jjjjxxx
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(Original post by Zain_Ahmed)
it isn't... Only if something sexual is going on before marriage.. other than that islam allows people going on dates and having a bf/gf
islam doesnt allow ppl to have bf and gf lmao wat u on about. Someone may have a crush and that is totally natural as we are human beings and cant control feelings, but that should end there and thats it
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jjjjxxx
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oh lord there u go another non muslim giving the wrong advice- anyone can be close friends, it doesnt necessarily mean u have to be dating them. Dating is HARAM. In the quran it says a man and a woman shouldnt be in privacy or else satan will be the third in the place. No one thinks of their god as bad anyways, and stop manipulating this person- how sick. Also it is totally a persons view on which one is better, i personally believe arranged marriages are so much better as there is a longer honeymoon period
(Original post by mgi)
How can you be very close friends with a nice single girl that you clearly fancy; that is called dating. Nothing wrong with dating but some muslims will tell you there is. From my point of view i really think it boils down to how you view the god of your religion. If you think your god is punitive. punishing and watching and waiting to catch you out to send you to hell then it is unlikely that you will ever be happy. If, on the other hand, you believe in a kind caring compassionate and wants you to happy with your current life as well then maybe you would actually date the girl in a highly respectful manner and seeif she really likes you as well. I bet your parents would be delighted for you if you found a really nice girl to eventually be married to. I think "love " marriages beat arranged marriages any day of the week!
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mgi
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(Original post by jjjjxxx)
islam doesnt allow ppl to have bf and gf lmao wat u on about. Someone may have a crush and that is totally natural as we are human beings and cant control feelings, but that should end there and thats it
Imao? In your opinion? Since when was your opinion to be equated with the Quran then? If you want to remain a virgin or not have a sexual relationship that is your choice. Your natural feelings don't just end there and then you ignore them because "' thats it". Islam is no better or worse than any other religion. Western culture will naturally clash with beliefs on sexual matters because the Quran. is not used as the basis of its morality or beliefs; its more likely to a be a form of Christianity or nothing. Like it or not that's where you live and a number of muslims struggle with clash of beliefs and that's why respect is the key. If a religion causes a perso. to suffer so much then i think they should set it aside and look at it from the outside. And look at other beluefs rather than just believe it because their culture has alwats said so. Culture is not always right. Seriously, would you like to live in a place such as Brunei?
Last edited by mgi; 1 month ago
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