I hate myself and I can't change Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 2 weeks ago
#1
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
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Anonymous #2
#2
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I’m very concerned and disheartened by this and would just like to let you know that you are always loved by someone no matter who you are! Have you considered taking up a hobby or sport? This would take time off your hands to stop you thinking so negatively and would give you something to talk about with people, this, I HIGHLY recommend!
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Jamesman1
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#3
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You need to do work on yourself
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Anonymous #3
#4
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yes, start some hobbies, they will definately take your mind off of everything--and im in sort of a similar situation to you.
if you're really unsatisfied with yourself, then use it as a learning experience, and not as excuses to bring yourself down...
also. at night, take a look at the sky/stars and feel outside of yourself for just a moment. what does it matter, if you've done "terrible" things or not, "intelligent" or not, "ugly" or not...what matters is you're well and have amazing potential to become satisfied with yourself. why? the fact that you're on TSR asking us this obviously means you have the aptitude-- there isnt actually anything wrong with you, no matter what you find in yourself that you dislike.
all of these things u dont like will get better in time, alright? what feels like a long time actually may not be, so be persistent
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Anonymous #4
#5
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Are you a boy?
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Anonymous #5
#6
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
I think you suffer from depression and you need an urgent advice from your GP. Please speak with your parents or any close person about how you feel.
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Anonymous #5
#7
Report 2 weeks ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
you remind me of my friend who thought everyone dislikes her because she has got a sever depression. Her family is tearing apart since she left them. Her family miss her so much and only want to speak with her but she refused because she thought everyone dislikes her. So, please don't let bad thoughts destroying your life. Be brave and ask for medical advice.
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Interrobang
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#8
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I'm really sorry that you feel like this, it must be tough to deal with thinking these things about yourself.

As others have said, it might be a good idea to talk to your GP, as they can help you access support. You could also consider talking to a trusted peer, teacher or family member.

If you don't feel able to talk to someone in person at the moment, there are organisations that can help and listen to you too:
Samaritans (116 123 or emailing [email protected])
Papyrus on HOPELINE (calling 0800 068 4141, texting 07786209697 or email: [email protected]. Their opening hours are 10am – 10pm on weekdays and 2pm – 10pm on weekends and bank holidays.)
Childline can also support you - you can email them and message them online, as well as ring them (https://www.childline.org.uk/get-support/)

I hope things get easier for you
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
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Wired_1800
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
You are not alone. Many people feel like this. You should focus on yourself and try to be unselfish.
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moggis
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#10
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OMG
Look OP, I can’t really say much about the way you look that I’m sure others will have said -I havnt read the other posts -but my goodness the rest of what you say really really doesn’t matter .
People are selfish period !
All of them .
Ok ok nearly all of them.
Welcome to the ******* club!
Havnt you see what humans do to animals ?
Truly truly awful.
But you are rather special you know .
And anyone who’s had the misfortune to reads @ny of my posts knows I don’t do BS.
And the reason you’re rather special is because you’ve recognised that you’re really quite selfish at such a tender age .
That’s bloody brilliant !
I didn’t realise I was selfish until I was about 30!
The fact that you’re hard on yourself makes you a very very useful addition to the human race.
We need people like you !
Take care and I’m sure the other posts were full of great advice .
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Anonymous #5
#11
Report 1 week ago
#11
Hello, we haven't heard from you, can you tell us how you feel now?
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
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Anonymous #1
#12
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#12
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hello, we haven't heard from you, can you tell us how you feel now?
I'm okay
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Anonymous #5
#13
Report 1 week ago
#13
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm okay
I'm really happy to hear from you. Did you visit the doctor or did you speak with your family about your feelings? If you haven't spoke with your parents, trust me it's the best thing to do. They will always care about you no matter what you have done. They will always support you and love you.
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mnaureen
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#14
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
Focus on yourself instead of trying to impress others. Look out for your flaws and try to change them. This will automatically bring change in you as well as the people around you. Everyone in this world feels low at some point or the other but don’t think of harming yourself. I was like this a few years back, thinking I ain’t good enough but trust me now when I look back, all those things simply don’t make any sense. You don’t feel intelligent or good looking because you compare yourself with others, drop that and you will feel good
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Anonymous #6
#15
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#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
being good talented and funny and likeable isn't what makes you a good person. killing yourself isn't the answer, your being really small minded, imagine how much your going to hurt your parents and family, you might want to keep a diary and write the thing you weren't happy with that day and every day try to change one bad quality. eg if one day you said something the next day you might want to share. if another day you was selfish you can give a gift to someone the next
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Anonymous #7
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Report 6 days ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
You are 16. This is when lots of things are happening in life. You're changing mentally and physically, and so are your friends and everyone around you at school. It can sometimes be hard for people to be on the same page, in line with one other and be there. I can understand how you might feel like you are attention seeking. The analogy I like to use is this: in life, you can either be inside of the circle or outside of the circle. When you're inside the circle, you feel high on life, you're having a good time, laughing, enjoying the company of those around you. You feel safe. Connected, but when you're outside the circle, you feel the opposite. You feel like people don't include you, but what's more, you don't think people see your VALUE. Everyone has value. You shouldn't think that those who you might exclude you have any more value than you do because that's not the case. Value isn't something you can quantify, compare your own to others. This might sound stupid, but it comes from inside. Whilst you feel terrible, beaten and alone it's easy to not see your true value. What kind of person you are. Your value is more just an attention seeker. Your value is more just someone who is awkward and can't hold a conversation. What you need to realise is you need some damned confidence. It might hurt to hear it or think about it, but think about the way you feel. The depression, anxiety, isolation of your emotions. You have to understand that that won't change unless YOU do something about it. Pop your collar.

I know I'm just some person on the internet that seems like they've got it all sorted out, but I don't. I'm 16 too actually, and I was drawn to your comment because honestly, you sound like me. I used to obsess over the way I looked, be selfish and cruel, hate my friends because I felt alone, although I have never seriously considered suicide. How I got past those things was this simple 4 word phrase: 'You live, you learn'. This has been my basis of all that I have learnt and grown over the past. When you do something that pisses you off, makes you feel stupid, or that you've hurt somebody else. You've done it. You can't change it. You can either sit there and cry about it and never get past it or say to yourself: "Ok, yeah I just did that. It was a mistake, and I didn't like it. I don't want to do something like that again, so I will proactively make the conscious decision to not do it again". You live (make a mistake), you learn (change the way you act).

By the way, killing yourself, don't do it. You're 16, and when we're honest with ourselves as teenagers, we know we don't always make the best decisions. Destroying 16 years of your life in 60 seconds is not right, and you should seriously consider speaking to someone. I know this is the adults and teachers favourite line when it comes to mental health, but it's true. Literally, just google 'suicide prevention website' and find help.
I am also not a therapist. I have no doubt there are discrepancies in what I've said, and I know that I haven't talked about all that you said. You should consider a therapist, but as a teen myself I fully understand the logistics and the difficulty of finding one. What I like to do, is write exactly how I'm feeling down. Everything. Then once I've done that, the way I'm feeling is no longer an ominous cloud casting its shadow on me, but a physical, real thing that I can comprehend.
Please consider all that I've said, mental health is no joke, drink more water and get more sleep, stay safe.
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PhylaVell
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#17
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm sixteen. I don't think there's anything good in me. I'm attention-seeking, and in the past I have done some terrible things to get attention. I am selfish and can be cruel sometimes, especially to the people I'm closest to. I do well in school but I'm not intelligent. I'm ugly, and I can't stop obsessing over the way I look. I am dishonest and sometimes I think that the only reason I ever do kind things is so I can think of myself as a good person. I am lazy and barely ever do any work. I used to love reading and writing but I barely even do that anymore. People at school think I'm nice, but I probably only act nice for attention. Once I get close to somebody I hurt them.

I'm not likeable. I can't hold a conversation and I'm not funny and I'm bad with people. I try but I just don't know what to say. I think even my friends don't really like me. They talk to me when I'm there but they don't text me, the way they do with each other. There are secrets and in jokes between them that I never know.

Last year I almost killed myself. I don't want to do that anymore but if I can't change and become a good person I probably will in a few years. I think I'm inherently selfish and there's nothing I can do to change that. I want to be good, and clever and talented, and likeable, but I can never be any of those things. I have tried for so long but I think I will always be like this.
I can relate to this a lot. I'm ugly too and can't stop obsessing over my looks. I am an incredibly introverted person and despite what people on this site think, I actually am not an attention-seeker and don't like being the center of attention. I can be over-sensitive and let my emotions cloud my judgment. I can be a bit blunt and end up hurting people's feelings. Essentially, I am flawed. Just like everyone else.

Perfection doesn't exist. In fact, I think there is something beautiful in imperfection.

Honestly, you don't sound like a bad person to me. Just someone who has been through a lot and is experiencing a lot of pain right now.

You aren't alone in how you feel. There are a lot of people who feel this way.

Sometimes, I want to give up as well but then I remember how many people depend upon me to help them. My students depend upon me to help them through their exams. My parents depend upon me to look after them. Heck, even my cat needs me to feed and look after her.

My advice is to try and think of at least one person who relies on you a lot. Even if it's one person, you still mean a lot to them. No one's life is completely worthless. We all have someone or something that ties us to this world.
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