Depressed for nearly 2 years.Will my depression every go away? Watch

Anonymous #1
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I got really depressed after starting a levels I am now on medication for 1 year.I am now in my 2nd year of a levels.I still feel rather down and depressed.Will my depression ever go away?I envy all those people who are happy.What does it feel like to be happy?
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ltsmith
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were you happy before you had exams?
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Gent2324
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it will go away if you put the effort in. why do you feel depressed?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ltsmith)
were you happy before you had exams?
I haven't been happy for the last 2 years.I don't remember what it is like to feel happy.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Gent2324)
it will go away if you put the effort in. why do you feel depressed?
I have a family history of depression, academic stress, unable to achieve the grades I want and I have a hard time making friends (I have autism)
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Gent2324
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have a family history of depression, academic stress, unable to achieve the grades I want and I have a hard time making friends (I have autism)
when you are feeling depressed, why do you feel that way? have you tried writing down the problems you are experiencing to make you feel depressed?
what is it exactly that is making you sad
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Yazzy.j
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I've been in your position. I know how you feel. one day you're gonna get out of this. one day it's all gonna get better. you have to fight and fight and you will win this battle. it's hard but it'll go one day. what helped me is positivity. it made everything a little bit easier. it's hard to come from an incredibly pessimistic to an optimistic person but if you are pessimistic, you should try it. im not saying it'll cure anything but it may make the journey easier for you. I genuinely hope you start feeling better soon coz I 100% understand how you feel.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Gent2324)
when you are feeling depressed, why do you feel that way? have you tried writing down the problems you are experiencing to make you feel depressed?
what is it exactly that is making you sad
I feel the way I feel because I have lost control of my life (academically) and also my weight has spiralled out of control I gained like (6kg) in 7 months (likely due to my medicine).I lost all motivation to study and I don't really want to get out of bed anymore.I feel the best when I am asleep.I feel like everyday it is the same old sh**.I know a levels will end soon for me but I won't get straight A's I am currently on UUB and my exams are in 2 weeks.It is too late to turn it all around.I don't think I will meet the grades for my insurance (BBB) let alone firm (AAB).I feel embarrassed of how I am doing and like I let myself and everyone else down especially my mum (she never says anything and just wants me to be happy) she gave up so many things in her life for me and my twin and raised us all on her own yet what does she get in return: a daughter like me.
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DiamondArtist
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I've personally never had depression but one of my best friends has/had it, she joined my friendship group 2 years ago and this was after shes had depression for 3 years already but in the past year or so we've (our friendship group) seen her open up and just seem happier. When she became friends with us, we were a close knit group with me and one girl having been friends our whole life, and knowing the other girl for 3 years but she clicked with us and we knew not to push things and understand when she cancels or just doesn't want to plan things with us because she's having a low day, when those days happen we include her in our plans (generally without her knowledge) just in case she changes her mind before or even on the day and she realises that we love her and kind of understand her as much as we can without experiencing it. Like I said she's not 'cured' but she's coming on days out a lot more and even suggesting some, and she's becoming more confident. We're also teaching her to be more selfish in a way because people tend to push her around or she'll volunteer for everything when she can't handle it so we keep saying to each other (not just her because I'm kind of the same way with strangers) "be selfish" and at first it was just with us but now she's doing it in work more, i.e not taking as many hours, and the self-care we're make her do like we all do facemasks in sleepovers, we make sure we text when we all get home, we message each other.

It's starts out as the little things that change, ones you won't notice but eventually you will, or other people will. It's not like a light switch that just turns off one night and doesn't come back on, you just have to chip away at it. I mean it's can just be your brain not producing the right amount of serotonin, thats not your fault and honestly your depression may always come back and you'll have a bad day but just build a good support network around you who will understand what you want/ need on those days whether its company or to be alone and what you need the days after.
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Gent2324
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel the way I feel because I have lost control of my life (academically) and also my weight has spiralled out of control I gained like (6kg) in 7 months (likely due to my medicine).I lost all motivation to study and I don't really want to get out of bed anymore.I feel the best when I am asleep.I feel like everyday it is the same old sh**.I know a levels will end soon for me but I won't get straight A's I am currently on UUB and my exams are in 2 weeks.It is too late to turn it all around.I don't think I will meet the grades for my insurance (BBB) let alone firm (AAB).I feel embarrassed of how I am doing and like I let myself and everyone else down especially my mum (she never says anything and just wants me to be happy) she gave up so many things in her life for me and my twin and raised us all on her own yet what does she get in return: a daughter like me.
i was like you a couple years ago, and the only thing that finally stopped me being depressed was forcing myself to do things i dont like. go for a run, i dont care if youre slow, i dont care if youre fat, just go for a run. dont think about why, just go and do it. make that first step and use that with other things in life.
you HAVE to go out of your comfort zone if you want to change.
you can pm me if you want any help, i was suicidal a couple years ago and was in a similar situation
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DiamondArtist
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Failing your A-levels is nothing in reality. If you want to you can go into clearing, or you can resit them, or a gap year, there's no wrong answer or one path. You shouldn't feel embarrassed though and I know me saying that isn't going to stop you but people will understand what you're going through, I mean theres people in my sixth form on UUU and thats not because they're depressed. Your mum will love you through your depression and she'll be proud she has a daughter like you because even though you've had depression for two years you're on here looking for help and hope for a happy future (which will come). A daughter she wouldn't be proud of is someone who doesn't want to get better and doesn't care about other people, which obviously you do.
(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel the way I feel because I have lost control of my life (academically) and also my weight has spiralled out of control I gained like (6kg) in 7 months (likely due to my medicine).I lost all motivation to study and I don't really want to get out of bed anymore.I feel the best when I am asleep.I feel like everyday it is the same old sh**.I know a levels will end soon for me but I won't get straight A's I am currently on UUB and my exams are in 2 weeks.It is too late to turn it all around.I don't think I will meet the grades for my insurance (BBB) let alone firm (AAB).I feel embarrassed of how I am doing and like I let myself and everyone else down especially my mum (she never says anything and just wants me to be happy) she gave up so many things in her life for me and my twin and raised us all on her own yet what does she get in return: a daughter like me.
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Yazzy.j
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#12
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I feel the way I feel because I have lost control of my life (academically) and also my weight has spiralled out of control I gained like (6kg) in 7 months (likely due to my medicine).I lost all motivation to study and I don't really want to get out of bed anymore.I feel the best when I am asleep.I feel like everyday it is the same old sh**.I know a levels will end soon for me but I won't get straight A's I am currently on UUB and my exams are in 2 weeks.It is too late to turn it all around.I don't think I will meet the grades for my insurance (BBB) let alone firm (AAB).I feel embarrassed of how I am doing and like I let myself and everyone else down especially my mum (she never says anything and just wants me to be happy) she gave up so many things in her life for me and my twin and raised us all on her own yet what does she get in return: a daughter like me.
this doesn't mean it's too late to change your life around. It may seem long and hard, but how about retaking year 13? you can have a fresh start. it's hard to get motivated to revise but what helps me is watching YouTubers just talking about revision and just getting up and doing it, trying to hype myself up and then when I get excited enough, I just do it. maybe you could try it too. I honestly think that maybe you should consider redoing the year but changing things. in life, whenever something goes wrong, try and learn from your mistakes and see what you can do next time to improve it. if it's motivation like you said, try and find new ways to get yourself motivated. if it's due to the difficulty and your revision methods aren't helping, try something new. it's just a suggestion but it might help.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Yazzy.j)
this doesn't mean it's too late to change your life around. It may seem long and hard, but how about retaking year 13? you can have a fresh start. it's hard to get motivated to revise but what helps me is watching YouTubers just talking about revision and just getting up and doing it, trying to hype myself up and then when I get excited enough, I just do it. maybe you could try it too. I honestly think that maybe you should consider redoing the year but changing things. in life, whenever something goes wrong, try and learn from your mistakes and see what you can do next time to improve it. if it's motivation like you said, try and find new ways to get yourself motivated. if it's due to the difficulty and your revision methods aren't helping, try something new. it's just a suggestion but it might help.
I have thought about redoing year 13 but I don't know where I can do that.I see lots of private schools offer such things but I wouldn't be able to afford it.I doubt my sixth form would allow me to resit year 13.
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Yazzy.j
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have thought about redoing year 13 but I don't know where I can do that.I see lots of private schools offer such things but I wouldn't be able to afford it.I doubt my sixth form would allow me to resit year 13.
Just ask your head of sixth form if you can. If you can't, email all of the state sixth forms near where you live and ask them.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Yazzy.j)
Just ask your head of sixth form if you can. If you can't, email all of the state sixth forms near where you live and ask them.
That's a good idea.I feel bad as I really want to meet my Warwick offer BBB and my mum is expecting me to go too university because me not going will put a huge financial burden upon her as she is a single mum.I did offer to get a job though.
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km2k01
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#16
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I got really depressed after starting a levels I am now on medication for 1 year.I am now in my 2nd year of a levels.I still feel rather down and depressed.Will my depression ever go away?I envy all those people who are happy.What does it feel like to be happy?
i know how you feel. i felt okay before a levels and now i’m like a completely different person - i feel physically sick when i have to wake up in the
morning and *trigger warning* i tried to kill myself in college. i’m hoping this is just because of the stress caused by exams and when this is all over i’ll feel okay again (i’m literally just counting down the days until i’m finally free from this ****, i don’t even feel up to revising anymore). i would suggest you go talk to someone about how you’re feeling, maybe a couple of CBT sessions would make you feel better
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by km2k01)
i know how you feel. i felt okay before a levels and now i’m like a completely different person - i feel physically sick when i have to wake up in the
morning and *trigger warning* i tried to kill myself in college. i’m hoping this is just because of the stress caused by exams and when this is all over i’ll feel okay again (i’m literally just counting down the days until i’m finally free from this ****, i don’t even feel up to revising anymore). i would suggest you go talk to someone about how you’re feeling, maybe a couple of CBT sessions would make you feel better
I had 14 sessions of CBT personally I found it not very helpful.I speak to people how I feel (my mum mostly) I speak to head of sixth form but they aren't very empathetic.I spoke to my psychiatrist but they aren't really getting my point of view.
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