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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#1
Hello all

In a new-ish relationship which has moved so fast. Like really serious. Anyway, we work at the same place but in different departments... We spend a lot of time together... But the past two nights I haven't stayed at his because I've had a day off etc and have also not been feeling great... Person stuff to do with girly stuff. Anyway, I feel like he's kind of getting annoyed that I've decided not to stay at his tonight. Reasons I didn't really want to text him.... I'm worried it might be a sign that he's controlling or doesn't like not getting his own way. I've not done anything wrong and obviously there's nothing wrong with him as a reason to me not staying over. That's probably what he's thinking. Can anyone shed a bit of light on this situation? I love your guys opinions nice to see it from a different point of view. There's obviously a lot of other opportunities for me to stay at his. I've kinda moved into his it feels the amount I've been staying there but it's not the first night I've stayed by myself. I think the space is nice sometimes.
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HoldThisL
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#2
Report 6 days ago
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he's annoyed because you're avoiding him without telling him why

he's not trying to control you, unless there's something i don't know

he's assuming the worst based on his own knowledge which is: "she was staying with me, now she's not staying with me and i don't know why"

you should just give him a bit more to go off
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bones-mccoy
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You haven't given him a reason as to why you're not staying over when you have been doing so, he's probably thinking he's done something wrong and his worry is coming out as annoyance. It's natural to blame ourselves when something changes without warning or explanation - it goes against the norm of what we're used to. You don't have to tell him the real reason but an equally believable white lie wouldn't have done any harm. You could also mention what you've written here - that you feel like things are moving a little too fast at the moment and that you still appreciate your own space sometimes. Depending on how he reacts can tell you a lot about him as a person - if he accepts your reason, whatever reason you give, then fine. If he doesn't, starts questioning you, still acts annoyed or upset or generally becomes unpleasant, then that's a red flag.
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