Do you think that I like this girl or not? Watch

Ultrasonix
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Ok so there's this girl, and I'm gonna need to rewind to tell you this stuff:

Year 7 , we get sat next to each other for English (which we have every day) and pretty much hate each other during this whole time

Year 9 , we've both changed a lot. We have an expedition/camping thingy and we get put in the same group (Which I technically made but that's a long story)

During this whole experience (including the planning that leads up to it) we become closer and by the end of it all, we are friends. I also start to have a crush on her

Year 10 , and we get at near each other in many classes and directly next to each other in Chemistry. The only other guy on out table was a bit weird and we talked to each other a lot. There were very clearly sparks between us that neither of us wanted to acknowledge; other people suspected we liked each other

As we become closer friends, I realise that I value our friendship more than any relationship we could ever have and start to stop having romantic feelings for her

Then, the year 10 version of the camping/expedition thing came around and I was in her group again (didn't make them this time). We were in the same group for preparation and the first trip but not the second one, although, we still hung out (with other people) once we arrived at the camping location

During this time, my feelings for her kinda started to resurface, and by the end of it all... I was really unsure whether I had a crush on her or not. I knew that either way, I cared about her deeply. Anyway, we end the year as quite close friends.

End of the Sophomore year and I'm going off on holiday on the second last day of school. Day before I leave, one of my best friends say that he knows who I like (after a long conversation about other stuff) I assure him that I know who he thinks I like and that I don't.

So I text him and he says he thought I liked this girl and I told him I don't and that I really hope she doesn't like me because if she does and says so, then it would make our friendship really awkward (and that's what I wanted to preserve)

This guy being the absolute bleep-de-bloop that he is (Don't worry, I'm still friends with him) told me he was gonna ask this girl and her friends if she liked me. I told him that's stupid because: 1. They wouldn't say it and 2. They're gonna think I like her. He keeps on insisting that he'll be discreet. but there's nothing I can do because I'm in another country

Anyway. he texts me saying that she and her friends said she doesn't (as expected). I continue to text her during the summer holidays. This is like the first time we have been able to actually hold up conversations on text (despite being able to talk so easily face-to-face)

Year 11 is different here in the UK. We have final exams and then many people switch schools for their next 2 years.

We aren't sat next to/near each other in any classes (Chemistry teacher had to move the class around because some people including us talked too much). We are however both still in music together and that is a small class

We still talk, but not as frequently or in depth as we used to. I almost got this feeling that she thought I liked her and was trying to not lead me on or whatever

This is where I become really confused

There was a strong possibility that she would be leaving the school (There isn't anymore) and I become quite saddened by this. I never actually ask her if she is leaving because I didn't want to have to accept that if she was

I started to think about how I could tell her that I care about her so deeply as a friend without making her think that I like her. I make loads of forum posts in different places asking people and I kept getting responses saying that I might just be repressing romantic feelings for her.

As we approach the last weeks of school (and this could totally just be my paranoia or whatever), I get this feeling that she is finding me annoying again and start to doubt that she ever viewed me as a friend. (Based off of actions I am probably looking too much into)

Last proper day of school (before exams leave etc.) and we are signing shirts (because uniform in the UK). We only see each other with like 1 minute of shirt signing time left. I start writing "I know you hated me in year 7 but I'm glad we ended up friends" However while I'm writing, the teacher shouts out "30 seconds left" and I forget what I was writing. I end up writing something like "I know you hated me in year 7 but - OK". We both laughed about it at the time, but I was quite sad about it. Also she didn't get a chance to sign mine (because time)

Anyway, I text her afterwards and say I forgot what I was saying and I tell her what I actually meant to say. She responds with two laughing emojis which could either be her not wanting to respond or her not knowing what to say in return

Either way do you think that:

I might just be repressing romantic feelings for her.

I'm just really confused. :/
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Anonymous #1
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That made me be really upset for some reason. I'm not sure if you're in love with her, because I don't know the whole history. But from what you've told me I can sense that you really do care for her and would feel sad with her absence. It could be that you've had fun developing a friendship with someone you once hated and as you have said you guys are really good friends. Once you start to like someone without them you would feel a little empty, as you said you didn't like the idea of her going to another sixth form. But also from her perspective it seems to me she is very distant from you, and I do think she does have a spark of feelings for you but doesn't know it yet. But perhaps this is just a very strong friendship that you must cherish and not ruin.
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Ultrasonix
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#3
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Thank you anon, not everyone is wiling to read this long a message
(Original post by Anonymous)
That made me be really upset for some reason. I'm not sure if you're in love with her, because I don't know the whole history. But from what you've told me I can sense that you really do care for her and would feel sad with her absence. It could be that you've had fun developing a friendship with someone you once hated and as you have said you guys are really good friends. Once you start to like someone without them you would feel a little empty, as you said you didn't like the idea of her going to another sixth form. But also from her perspective it seems to me she is very distant from you, and I do think she does have a spark of feelings for you but doesn't know it yet. But perhaps this is just a very strong friendship that you must cherish and not ruin.
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Anonymous #1
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Tbh I don't read long messages but the title was different to others. You seemed confused.
(Original post by Ultrasonix)
Thank you anon, not everyone is wiling to read this long a message
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Ultrasonix
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I genuinely am. Thank you again.
(Original post by Anonymous)
Tbh I don't read long messages but the title was different to others. You seemed confused.
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Anonymous #1
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Don't stop contact after high school, this seems like a good connection that will last.
(Original post by Ultrasonix)
I genuinely am. Thank you again.
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Ultrasonix
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I really hope so
(Original post by Anonymous)
Don't stop contact after high school, this seems like a good connection that will last.
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Flower12321
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Honestly, I think you should go on a group night out like you and a friend and the girl and her friend as just a chill kinda thing. And then try to speak to her privately, do you think she is mature like if you think she is, write her a letter straight to the point about your feelings and how you don't want to ruin your friendship and give it to her and wait for her reaction. Good luck!
(Original post by Ultrasonix)
Ok so there's this girl, and I'm gonna need to rewind to tell you this stuff:

Year 7 , we get sat next to each other for English (which we have every day) and pretty much hate each other during this whole time

Year 9 , we've both changed a lot. We have an expedition/camping thingy and we get put in the same group (Which I technically made but that's a long story)

During this whole experience (including the planning that leads up to it) we become closer and by the end of it all, we are friends. I also start to have a crush on her

Year 10 , and we get at near each other in many classes and directly next to each other in Chemistry. The only other guy on out table was a bit weird and we talked to each other a lot. There were very clearly sparks between us that neither of us wanted to acknowledge; other people suspected we liked each other

As we become closer friends, I realise that I value our friendship more than any relationship we could ever have and start to stop having romantic feelings for her

Then, the year 10 version of the camping/expedition thing came around and I was in her group again (didn't make them this time). We were in the same group for preparation and the first trip but not the second one, although, we still hung out (with other people) once we arrived at the camping location

During this time, my feelings for her kinda started to resurface, and by the end of it all... I was really unsure whether I had a crush on her or not. I knew that either way, I cared about her deeply. Anyway, we end the year as quite close friends.

End of the Sophomore year and I'm going off on holiday on the second last day of school. Day before I leave, one of my best friends say that he knows who I like (after a long conversation about other stuff) I assure him that I know who he thinks I like and that I don't.

So I text him and he says he thought I liked this girl and I told him I don't and that I really hope she doesn't like me because if she does and says so, then it would make our friendship really awkward (and that's what I wanted to preserve)

This guy being the absolute bleep-de-bloop that he is (Don't worry, I'm still friends with him) told me he was gonna ask this girl and her friends if she liked me. I told him that's stupid because: 1. They wouldn't say it and 2. They're gonna think I like her. He keeps on insisting that he'll be discreet. but there's nothing I can do because I'm in another country

Anyway. he texts me saying that she and her friends said she doesn't (as expected). I continue to text her during the summer holidays. This is like the first time we have been able to actually hold up conversations on text (despite being able to talk so easily face-to-face)

Year 11 is different here in the UK. We have final exams and then many people switch schools for their next 2 years.

We aren't sat next to/near each other in any classes (Chemistry teacher had to move the class around because some people including us talked too much). We are however both still in music together and that is a small class

We still talk, but not as frequently or in depth as we used to. I almost got this feeling that she thought I liked her and was trying to not lead me on or whatever

This is where I become really confused

There was a strong possibility that she would be leaving the school (There isn't anymore) and I become quite saddened by this. I never actually ask her if she is leaving because I didn't want to have to accept that if she was

I started to think about how I could tell her that I care about her so deeply as a friend without making her think that I like her. I make loads of forum posts in different places asking people and I kept getting responses saying that I might just be repressing romantic feelings for her.

As we approach the last weeks of school (and this could totally just be my paranoia or whatever), I get this feeling that she is finding me annoying again and start to doubt that she ever viewed me as a friend. (Based off of actions I am probably looking too much into)

Last proper day of school (before exams leave etc.) and we are signing shirts (because uniform in the UK). We only see each other with like 1 minute of shirt signing time left. I start writing "I know you hated me in year 7 but I'm glad we ended up friends" However while I'm writing, the teacher shouts out "30 seconds left" and I forget what I was writing. I end up writing something like "I know you hated me in year 7 but - OK". We both laughed about it at the time, but I was quite sad about it. Also she didn't get a chance to sign mine (because time)

Anyway, I text her afterwards and say I forgot what I was saying and I tell her what I actually meant to say. She responds with two laughing emojis which could either be her not wanting to respond or her not knowing what to say in return

Either way do you think that:

I might just be repressing romantic feelings for her.

I'm just really confused. :/
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Ultrasonix
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#9
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See I would love to, and I was genuinely considering it with the end of high school being a really good reason to write messages to people (I did so to people who I am less close to than her even) except for the fact that I have recently started to feel that she might find me annoying and that I was imagining any spark between us. This could very easily be me psychoanalysing situations but idk :/
(Original post by Flower12321)
Honestly, I think you should go on a group night out like you and a friend and the girl and her friend as just a chill kinda thing. And then try to speak to her privately, do you think she is mature like if you think she is, write her a letter straight to the point about your feelings and how you don't want to ruin your friendship and give it to her and wait for her reaction. Good luck!
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Anonymous #2
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That is so cute omg, I’m not good at advice so I’m j gonna say try to hang out during summer and just have a talk to her about how you used to have a crush on her or smth and see what she says (please ignore my advice it’s so sh*t oops)
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Ultrasonix
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Hey even if your advice was the worst advice ever, it would still be better than the guy on reddit who told me to f*p to the thoguht of her and see what happens.

Also, that's kinda my entire problem. i would love to tell her how I feel and despite it being something I avoided for so long, I've recently built up the confidence to have that sort of conversation saying I used to like her and asking her how I feel etc. etc, but recently (and this could be my fear and psychoanalysisng stuff taking over) I've felt like she finds me annoying and that I may have imagined this spark we have, despite many other people thinking it was there and me continuing to feel it even when I stopped having a crush on her.

But anyway, thanks for reading such a long message (not everyone is willing to )
(Original post by Anonymous)
That is so cute omg, I’m not good at advice so I’m j gonna say try to hang out during summer and just have a talk to her about how you used to have a crush on her or smth and see what she says (please ignore my advice it’s so sh*t oops)
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Talhawaseem02
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Erm ..... not sure what to do but if you are in yr 11 uk do you have a prom ...... if so ask her if you want to go together (as friends or more your choice) and go from there . Cuz that is a good night to express feelings etc
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Ultrasonix
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Literally no-one in my school is 'going with anyone' and so that would be super awkward
But thanks for reading, not many people do because it's so long
(Original post by Talhawaseem02)
Erm ..... not sure what to do but if you are in yr 11 uk do you have a prom ...... if so ask her if you want to go together (as friends or more your choice) and go from there . Cuz that is a good night to express feelings etc
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yv283031
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Simple solution - be brave ask to meet her to meet up at a cafe / pub. If she agrees then she may well be interested. If you do meet up you should try and kiss her - then you will definitely know if you fancy her or not because you will know if it feels right and if she wants to straight a way. Life is short - you've got nothing to lose
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Ultrasonix
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Uhhhhh. I've got my whole friendship with her to lose if I try to randomly kiss her 😳😳
Also, I don't want to try and kiss someone if I'm not sure if I like them. What if realise I don't but she likes me? Then I've led her on by kissing her.

Thanks for reading the post though (Not many people would be willing to because It's really long )
(Original post by yv283031)
Simple solution - be brave ask to meet her to meet up at a cafe / pub. If she agrees then she may well be interested. If you do meet up you should try and kiss her - then you will definitely know if you fancy her or not because you will know if it feels right and if she wants to straight a way. Life is short - you've got nothing to lose
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Talhawaseem02
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(Original post by Ultrasonix)
Literally no-one in my school is 'going with anyone' and so that would be super awkward
But thanks for reading, not many people do because it's so long
It's fine ... maybe at prom just talk to her and be around her
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Ultrasonix
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Yeah probably. I tend the be one of the guys in out form that interacts with girls more (trying to get guys and girls to talk to each other can be a pain) so it could be easily done
(Original post by Talhawaseem02)
It's fine ... maybe at prom just talk to her and be around her
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Talhawaseem02
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(Original post by Ultrasonix)
Yeah probably. I tend the be one of the guys in out form that interacts with girls more (trying to get guys and girls to talk to each other can be a pain) so it could be easily done
I love advising people in things I'm so ill-equipped for
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username4563202
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Well I came to this forum seeking help/guidance for a similar situation. I've been talking to this girl on Instagram for months and have developed feelings for her but the only problem is I feel like she would only want us to stay as good friends. I'm still deciding whether to go to her sixth form and try develop things there. The only thing is, Im confused about whether she knows I have feelings for her or not because my cousin who is a good friend of hers tells me that the girl knows she is the only person I speak to on Instagram because of the times I log in and out are just times im speaking with her. If a girl knew her friend liked her would she speak to him about it or just keep it a secret? Ugh Im so confused rn on what to do. As for your situation, to me it seems evident you do like her and if you do wish to either preserve your friendship or take things further then you should maintain daily contact on socials and meet up here and there first as a group then just with each other alone. Once you reach this stage you can begin to test the waters by bringing up the past and how she felt when hearing that you liked her although this is a bit risky.
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Ultrasonix
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Do not just go to her 6th form because she is there. That's the best advice I can give you. Maybe talk to you cousin. If she already thinks you like her you might aswell tell her the truth so she's knows not to spread rumours (unless you're not too close to your cousin)

Thank you for reading this post aswell
(Original post by RR.Nabil)
Well I came to this forum seeking help/guidance for a similar situation. I've been talking to this girl on Instagram for months and have developed feelings for her but the only problem is I feel like she would only want us to stay as good friends. I'm still deciding whether to go to her sixth form and try develop things there. The only thing is, Im confused about whether she knows I have feelings for her or not because my cousin who is a good friend of hers tells me that the girl knows she is the only person I speak to on Instagram because of the times I log in and out are just times im speaking with her. If a girl knew her friend liked her would she speak to him about it or just keep it a secret? Ugh Im so confused rn on what to do. As for your situation, to me it seems evident you do like her and if you do wish to either preserve your friendship or take things further then you should maintain daily contact on socials and meet up here and there first as a group then just with each other alone. Once you reach this stage you can begin to test the waters by bringing up the past and how she felt when hearing that you liked her although this is a bit risky.
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