Why do men only care about one thing? Watch

Studentnewcastle
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Every time I meet a guy I like and have a connection with and I feel he is the one he turns out to only care about sex and when I tell him that am looking for a relationship possibly marriage they completely lose interest and ignore me.....
Due to my faith and culture I refuse to engage in any sexual acts with a man before marriage because I truly believe an honest man will wait someone who loves me will wait
But I feel like it’s impossible to find anymore I been disappointed many times and I began to believe I might not find the one
Is there no one waiting anymore?
Do men only care about one thing?
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Anonymous #1
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I mean as a young man I care about food, food, my family, food, my friends, food, etc. as well as other things like finding a partner.
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Ness2003
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Erm. No. They usually care about 2 things - food AND sex. :-)
On a serious note, depending on the men’s age - they do have stage when sex is constantly on their mind (if we are talking about a healthy young male).
Wearing wedding dress for the first date at Starbucks may be a bit excessive, as well as discussing marriage, number of children, and colour of the curtains in your dining room with your date - they will loose interest in you for sure. Try finding other topics to discuss until you get to know each other very well, which brings me to the next, very important part of your question/opinion.
“Honest man that will wait” in your case may have to be from the same culture. Then, you can expect him to wait. If, however, you want to venture outside it, you will find that in many cultures men and women do not want to wait for intimacy until they are married, but will want to check if they are sexually compatible before they commit to “forever and a day”. Therefore, you cannot expect the men you meet to accept something that isn’t part of their culture.
You didn’t say what men you meet, so it’s difficult to comment why they seem to lose interest.
(Original post by Studentnewcastle)
Every time I meet a guy I like and have a connection with and I feel he is the one he turns out to only care about sex and when I tell him that am looking for a relationship possibly marriage they completely lose interest and ignore me.....
Due to my faith and culture I refuse to engage in any sexual acts with a man before marriage because I truly believe an honest man will wait someone who loves me will wait
But I feel like it’s impossible to find anymore I been disappointed many times and I began to believe I might not find the one
Is there no one waiting anymore?
Do men only care about one thing?
Last edited by Ness2003; 1 week ago
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RichPiana
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999tigger
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(Original post by Studentnewcastle)
Every time I meet a guy I like and have a connection with and I feel he is the one he turns out to only care about sex and when I tell him that am looking for a relationship possibly marriage they completely lose interest and ignore me.....
Due to my faith and culture I refuse to engage in any sexual acts with a man before marriage because I truly believe an honest man will wait someone who loves me will wait
But I feel like it’s impossible to find anymore I been disappointed many times and I began to believe I might not find the one
Is there no one waiting anymore?
Do men only care about one thing?
Not really true, because not all men are the same.
At that age though many are.

I am unsure what cultural preferences or limitations you are placing on yourself due to your faith and culture.
I thiink some are going to be put off if you are so serious from the outset and tell them you are looking for a serious relationship probably marriage, when you dont even know them. It sounds a bit restricting.

You should also get rid of this idea of the one or you will cause yourself more misery.

You need to reappraise what you want , how to get it and probably some of your expectations or the way you come across when interacting with men. Maybe too serious too soon and it makes you sound a bit scary or a lot of work, hence they run off.
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sinfonietta
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It's not that men care only about sex; but many men see sex as an important and desirable aspect of a relationship. Many women do too.

The idea that if someone truly loves you they will do X for you is untrue. I mean I wouldn't date a man who wanted to wait - how much I care for him is irrelevant, if he doesn't want to sleep with me then we're not going to work because I'll be unhappy. Love isn't about making yourself unhappy for someone else. :dontknow:
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barnetlad
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It's not true. Some men do not like football.
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Dunnig Kruger
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This is getting like a Monty Python sketch.

What about money? Men care about money.
So that's sex, food, money...


For Studentnewcastle, there are plenty of women who will have sex without the condition of marriage. It therefore makes a huge amount of sense for men to go with them instead of going with someone who has the condition of marriage attached to sex.
It's just the social norm in the UK today. And for the last 50 years - at least.
Try before you buy or renting instead of buying makes a lot of sense in this area. I would not want to be married to someone with whom I was sexually incompatible even if she were good enough in every other area. Any logical thinking man will think the same.

The cold hard truth is that for each man that has met you, there are better alternatives (for them) than getting married to you. With the alternatives being: sex outside of marriage with someone else with an open ended choice thereafter of whether to proceed with marriage or not.
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Anonymous #2
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They probably went to an all boys school
Lad culture is rife there
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sknudson
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The correct man also cares about lifting: Sex, money, food, and gainz. Not in that order for me personally.
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Napp
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(Original post by Anonymous)
They probably went to an all boys school
Lad culture is rife there
Or they're a normal human being :rolleyes:
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Napp)
Or they're a normal human being :rolleyes:
most are bad
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Studentnewcastle
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But when they go abroad after reaching a certain age and looking a certain way and unable to find a suitable woman they spent thousands on a mail order bride and want to marry her before even touching her I realize what I should do now I should only look for men in my culture cause outside won’t work I actually found a man who was ready to wait the only issue he wasn’t attractive to me
(Original post by Dunnig Kruger)
This is getting like a Monty Python sketch.

What about money? Men care about money.
So that's sex, food, money...


For Studentnewcastle, there are plenty of women who will have sex without the condition of marriage. It therefore makes a huge amount of sense for men to go with them instead of going with someone who has the condition of marriage attached to sex.
It's just the social norm in the UK today. And for the last 50 years - at least.
Try before you buy or renting instead of buying makes a lot of sense in this area. I would not want to be married to someone with whom I was sexually incompatible even if she were good enough in every other area. Any logical thinking man will think the same.

The cold hard truth is that for each man that has met you, there are better alternatives (for them) than getting married to you. With the alternatives being: sex outside of marriage with someone else with an open ended choice thereafter of whether to proceed with marriage or not.
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JoshDarnIt
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Not all men are like this, believe me
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Studentnewcastle
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I have realistic expectations I want an educated man with a good job and acceptable look I believe in waiting cause God said so and cause its the right thing in my culture nonetheless my issue is I haven’t been interested or met anyone from my culture In my university or outside also they are too strict for me so I been dating outside and every time I like a guy he leaves me cause I won’t have physical sex or phone with him which hurt cause I have more to offer and men don’t seem to be interested in any relationship or marriage anymore
(Original post by 999tigger)
Not really true, because not all men are the same.
At that age though many are.

I am unsure what cultural preferences or limitations you are placing on yourself due to your faith and culture.
I thiink some are going to be put off if you are so serious from the outset and tell them you are looking for a serious relationship probably marriage, when you dont even know them. It sounds a bit restricting.

You should also get rid of this idea of the one or you will cause yourself more misery.

You need to reappraise what you want , how to get it and probably some of your expectations or the way you come across when interacting with men. Maybe too serious too soon and it makes you sound a bit scary or a lot of work, hence they run off.
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Precious Illusions
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Well, sadly a large majority of men will not want to wait until marriage to have sex unless they're of a similar faith mindset as you. It's not that sex is all they care about, it's just a very important aspect to many people for a relationship to work, i.e. most people would not want to risk getting married to find out that they are not sexually compatible.

Hopefully you can find someone with the same views as you though.
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Studentnewcastle
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God said to wait for marriage and that’s what I will do plus In my culture a woman who sleeps around is considered bad and not a marriage material and usually they end up alone in 60s and childless and nobody wants them I believe waiting makes us love each other’s in other aspects because physical aspect don’t last and beauty goes away but love lasts and if they really love u they will propose
(Original post by sinfonietta)
It's not that men care only about sex; but many men see sex as an important and desirable aspect of a relationship. Many women do too.

The idea that if someone truly loves you they will do X for you is untrue. I mean I wouldn't date a man who wanted to wait - how much I care for him is irrelevant, if he doesn't want to sleep with me then we're not going to work because I'll be unhappy. Love isn't about making yourself unhappy for someone else. :dontknow:
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Studentnewcastle
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That’s what I see I been with more than ten men whom I really liked but as soon as I said I don’t desire sex before marriage I was ignored and they made me feel before that they loved me
(Original post by JoshDarnIt)
Not all men are like this, believe me
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Anonymous #3
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I’m guessing you are Muslim (because premarital sex is a big No-No)- so maybe look for a Muslim man to marry, they -well most of them- would wait till marriage if they care about religion
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JoshDarnIt
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(Original post by Studentnewcastle)
That’s what I see I been with more than ten men whom I really liked but as soon as I said I don’t desire sex before marriage I was ignored and they made me feel before that they loved me
That's 10 men out of how many? There are so many more in the world so you can't really say all men are like this just from your experience with 10 of them.

Don't give up hope just yet.
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