Cousin is suing me. What can I do? Watch

Anonymous #1
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Cousin A just got married. I was a bridesmaid. Cousin B was not.

Cousin A offered B maid of honour, but B said it "made her sound old" so she didn't want that and when A said "okay what about bridesmaid?" B said that would be a step down.

A got frustrated and said "okay then you get nothing." I saw the text conversation about it and that was all that was said. A admitted maybe she was a bit quick to exclude B but it was her wedding and she and B have had a rocky relationship in the past and this was her reaching out. She was willing to accommodate B but not at the expense of her wedding day.

Cousin B was so angry about not being in the bridal party she decided to wear her wedding dress from when she got married to Cousin A's wedding. Then, to top it all off, she arrived late to the wedding but before A got there so there was a tense few moments where she appeared in the doorway of the church in a wedding dress while everyone was waiting for the bride and everyone had to check which cousin it was.

Cousin A was understandably upset. At the reception I asked A if she wanted me to talk to Cousin B but A said "don't give her the satisfaction" and spent the day not talking to B.

I went to get another glass of wine from the bar. It was red wine. I'm partially deaf in my right ear. I thought I heard B saying my name behind me but I wasn't sure where the voice was coming from. I turned, nearly full glass of red wine in hand, and promptly knocked into B, spilling some wine on her wedding dress.

I apologised when it happened, and it wasn't the whole glass, maybe 1/5 of the glass(?) but some of it did get on the skirt of her dress. At the time, she told me it was fine, but afterwards I heard her complaining to another cousin about the wine.

I mean, it was red wine on a white dress. I imagine that would be a bit tricky to get out.

I think B and her husband had an anniversary within the last 6 months but I'm not sure if it was their 5th or 6th wedding anniversary. All I know is the dress is pretty old, but she bought it new and when it was new is was about 3 grand. Her husband is a lawyer.

She says she wants me to repay her for the cost of the dress (I'm a student and I have about £300 in my account until next payday at the end of the month) and she says if I don't repay her then her husband has said she could sue me.

What do I do?
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Anonymous #3
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Hit up Kris Jenner and tell her to watch out cause that would make a better reality show. Also, cousin B sounds really annoying and full of herself.
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FeteOnTheGround
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Please ignore the pedantic idiot above, posting anonomously so they can be an arshole in safety.

That sounds incredibly stressful. I have no idea about the law in this case (perhaps phone the Citizen's Advice Bureau? It doesn't sounds right that they can sue you over something that was clearly an accident and also a really common thing to happen.
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Anonymous #4
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Judge rinder
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batter mix
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tl;dr

But the correct answer to someone suing you is always, SUE THEM BACK!


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Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer. idk anything.
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HoldThisL
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you probably are liable but not for the cost of the entire dress - that would be absurd. perhaps the cost of having it cleaned professionally?

don't admit liability to paying for the whole of the dress
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Use proper paragraphs and punctuation for a start.
Mate, I'm literally an English student I just don't like how the spacing looks and normal paragraphing makes it take up like twice as much space.
(Original post by Anonymous)
Hit up Kris Jenner and tell her to watch out cause that would make a better reality show. Also, cousin B sounds really annoying and full of herself.
@ Kris Jenner I'm coming for your wig sleep w one eye open binch
Cousin B is the worst. She's caused a scene at three separate funerals (nan, grandad, great aunt) over how the wills are split and shows up at family things just to brag about how she married a lawyer. Last time she came to a family thing it was a reunion, she wore white louboutins and then she messaged my aunt afterwards demanding she pay her back for the cost of her heels because there was mud on the soles and a scuff mark on the toe, which she said ruined the red soles of the shoes and the white tops. I think she said one of my aunt's kids stood on her foot. I don't think there was any case there whatsoever but my aunt was in the middle of a divorce, fighting for custody, and was nervous about the possibility of a court case and agreed to pay, and they weren't cheap. Somewhere in the neighbourhood of 500-600 pounds. Checked the website to see and most pairs look to be about £595.
(Original post by FeteOnTheGround)
Please ignore the pedantic idiot above, posting anonomously so they can be an arshole in safety.

That sounds incredibly stressful. I have no idea about the law in this case (perhaps phone the Citizen's Advice Bureau? It doesn't sounds right that they can sue you over something that was clearly an accident and also a really common thing to happen.
Thanks.
Cousin B says that she saw me talking to Cousin A before it happened (when I asked A if she wanted me to pull B aside and she said no) and as B didn't hear what happened, B claims that A and I somehow plotted or at least she asked me to ruin B's dress as some sort of payback for B wearing a wedding dress to A's wedding. Her lawyer husband says that if there was a plan beforehand then she could have a case. I told A and A said she would message B and tell her it wasn't planned but A says that B has blocked her on everything.
(Original post by Anonymous)
Judge rinder
ASDFGHJKL
(Original post by batter mix)
tl;dr

But the correct answer to someone suing you is always, SUE THEM BACK!

Spoiler:
Show
Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer. idk anything.
Short version is Cousin B wore a wedding dress to Cousin A's wedding and upset her and I accidentally spilled red wine on it and she's suing me.
Cousin B hasn't really done anything to me that I think I could sue her over?
(Original post by HoldThisL)
you probably are liable but not for the cost of the entire dress - that would be absurd. perhaps the cost of having it cleaned professionally?

don't admit liability to paying for the whole of the dress
I told her again that it was an accident but she's threatening small claims court. I asked if she'd looked into professional cleaning services and she said she looked into a few and all either quoted £700-1000 or just told her to throw out the dress altogether, in which case she wants it replaced but it's 5 or 6 years old so she'd probably want the money she paid for it back. I talked to the cleaners at the bottom of the road who did my sister's communion dress, which was also white and beaded like B's dress is. My little sister covered it in mud and they were able to get it back to white no problem, and they said that they would probably charge me more like £150 for a bit of wine on a wedding dress, less if it was a small stain, and said £300 was the absolute most and that would be if it was like a bottle of wine dumped all over the dress.
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HoldThisL
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I told her again that it was an accident but she's threatening small claims court. I asked if she'd looked into professional cleaning services and she said she looked into a few and all either quoted £700-1000 or just told her to throw out the dress altogether, in which case she wants it replaced but it's 5 or 6 years old so she'd probably want the money she paid for it back. I talked to the cleaners at the bottom of the road who did my sister's communion dress, which was also white and beaded like B's dress is. My little sister covered it in mud and they were able to get it back to white no problem, and they said that they would probably charge me more like £150 for a bit of wine on a wedding dress, less if it was a small stain, and said £300 was the absolute most and that would be if it was like a bottle of wine dumped all over the dress.
if/when it's becomes a legal case all of her threats go out the window and a rational judge will make the decision based on the damage to the dress and a reasonable quote from a cleaner, if it comes to that.

as i said, i think you are liable for damage but definitely not the cost of the whole dress so if it goes to court, get a quote from a couple of respectable cleaners that you can present in court
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Analyst89
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I've edited the OP for readability purposes.

You should use paragraphs as it makes things easier to read and get suitable replies.
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RazzzBerries
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Judge rinder
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/CostlyFlaw...on-max-1mb.gif
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by HoldThisL)
if/when it's becomes a legal case all of her threats go out the window and a rational judge will make the decision based on the damage to the dress and a reasonable quote from a cleaner, if it comes to that.

as i said, i think you are liable for damage but definitely not the cost of the whole dress so if it goes to court, get a quote from a couple of respectable cleaners that you can present in court
She says she's spoken to a few and they all quoted between £800 and £1000 but I also spoke to the one near me and rang a few more local ones and they all said probably around £150 but £300-350 at most. I'm not sure why it's so different? Maybe I'm asking about the wrong thing?
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Anonymous #3
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Bruhhh she’s a full on b***h. Man I’d cut her off. Can you imagine showing up to a funeral and the first thing that comes out of her mouth is wills? She’s money-hungry lmao. Like who tf told her to wear her bloody £600 shoes to a casual reunion then? Children are children. Let them be. They don’t care about your shoes lmao they’ll step on you and play around. Can’t her LaWyeR husband pay for the repair of her Louboutins? Like if she can afford a paid of those shoes, she sure as hell can afford to repair them. What does she do for a living? I’ll laugh if she’s not got all that of a great career. It would be pathetic if she’s using her husband’s money for all that rubbish. Wow, I’m mad for you lmao.
(Original post by Anonymous)
Mate, I'm literally an English student I just don't like how the spacing looks and normal paragraphing makes it take up like twice as much space.

@ Kris Jenner I'm coming for your wig sleep w one eye open binch
Cousin B is the worst. She's caused a scene at three separate funerals (nan, grandad, great aunt) over how the wills are split and shows up at family things just to brag about how she married a lawyer. Last time she came to a family thing it was a reunion, she wore white louboutins and then she messaged my aunt afterwards demanding she pay her back for the cost of her heels because there was mud on the soles and a scuff mark on the toe, which she said ruined the red soles of the shoes and the white tops. I think she said one of my aunt's kids stood on her foot. I don't think there was any case there whatsoever but my aunt was in the middle of a divorce, fighting for custody, and was nervous about the possibility of a court case and agreed to pay, and they weren't cheap. Somewhere in the neighbourhood of 500-600 pounds. Checked the website to see and most pairs look to be about £595.

Thanks.
Cousin B says that she saw me talking to Cousin A before it happened (when I asked A if she wanted me to pull B aside and she said no) and as B didn't hear what happened, B claims that A and I somehow plotted or at least she asked me to ruin B's dress as some sort of payback for B wearing a wedding dress to A's wedding. Her lawyer husband says that if there was a plan beforehand then she could have a case. I told A and A said she would message B and tell her it wasn't planned but A says that B has blocked her on everything.

ASDFGHJKL

Short version is Cousin B wore a wedding dress to Cousin A's wedding and upset her and I accidentally spilled red wine on it and she's suing me.
Cousin B hasn't really done anything to me that I think I could sue her over?

I told her again that it was an accident but she's threatening small claims court. I asked if she'd looked into professional cleaning services and she said she looked into a few and all either quoted £700-1000 or just told her to throw out the dress altogether, in which case she wants it replaced but it's 5 or 6 years old so she'd probably want the money she paid for it back. I talked to the cleaners at the bottom of the road who did my sister's communion dress, which was also white and beaded like B's dress is. My little sister covered it in mud and they were able to get it back to white no problem, and they said that they would probably charge me more like £150 for a bit of wine on a wedding dress, less if it was a small stain, and said £300 was the absolute most and that would be if it was like a bottle of wine dumped all over the dress.
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MidgetFever
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What could she actually sue you for though? As in, legally what is her cause of action? Because I really don't see how she could sue you. Especially given that it was an accident.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Bruhhh she’s a full on b***h. Man I’d cut her off. Can you imagine showing up to a funeral and the first thing that comes out of her mouth is wills? She’s money-hungry lmao. Like who tf told her to wear her bloody £600 shoes to a casual reunion then? Children are children. Let them be. They don’t care about your shoes lmao they’ll step on you and play around. Can’t her LaWyeR husband pay for the repair of her Louboutins? Like if she can afford a paid of those shoes, she sure as hell can afford to repair them. What does she do for a living? I’ll laugh if she’s not got all that of a great career. It would be pathetic if she’s using her husband’s money for all that rubbish. Wow, I’m mad for you lmao.
She's taken two series of photos her entire life. One decorates the walls of their home. The other one was part of her ex boyfriend's student art project. She says this makes her a professional model. The only actual paying job she had was in my uncle's cafe, and all of us, cousins included, took turns working there, and she always pushed her shifts onto us or just didn't show. She's the worst.
I swear she shows up to any social event ever and she says "hi, like my [expensive designer thing]? i married a lawyer, in case you forgot. are you still single? poor you. i'm worried everyone else in the family will turn into destitute spinsters without following my example" and then leaves, and a week later whoever hosted gets a bill. When she last hosted something a week went by and then we all got separate paypal requests for £50 each, which is what she said a restaurant would have charged for each meal.
In short, she's the exact kind of person to wear her own wedding dress to her sisters wedding because she rejected maid of honour and bridesmaid.
(Original post by MidgetFever)
What could she actually sue you for though? As in, legally what is her cause of action? Because I really don't see how she could sue you. Especially given that it was an accident.
B says that when she saw me and Cousin A talking she believes that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress. In the messages she mentioned the "criminal damage act 1971" and I googled it and it says "a person is guilty of criminal damage if they intentionally or recklessly destroy or damage property belonging to another without lawful excuse." B thinks that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress as payback for B wearing her wedding dress to A's wedding, and it wasn't an accident, and she says if she can prove that in court then I have to pay her back what she paid for the dress. Honestly, it sounds really weird to me, but I'm not the one with a lawyer for a husband. I know he's probably biased, or at least trying to appease her, but he still has a far better grasp of the law than I do. So if he tells her that she can take me to small claims court over this, then I'm preparing for her to take me to small claims court.
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MidgetFever
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She's taken two series of photos her entire life. One decorates the walls of their home. The other one was part of her ex boyfriend's student art project. She says this makes her a professional model. The only actual paying job she had was in my uncle's cafe, and all of us, cousins included, took turns working there, and she always pushed her shifts onto us or just didn't show. She's the worst.
I swear she shows up to any social event ever and she says "hi, like my [expensive designer thing]? i married a lawyer, in case you forgot. are you still single? poor you. i'm worried everyone else in the family will turn into destitute spinsters without following my example" and then leaves, and a week later whoever hosted gets a bill. When she last hosted something a week went by and then we all got separate paypal requests for £50 each, which is what she said a restaurant would have charged for each meal.
In short, she's the exact kind of person to wear her own wedding dress to her sisters wedding because she rejected maid of honour and bridesmaid.

B says that when she saw me and Cousin A talking she believes that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress. In the messages she mentioned the "criminal damage act 1971" and I googled it and it says "a person is guilty of criminal damage if they intentionally or recklessly destroy or damage property belonging to another without lawful excuse." B thinks that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress as payback for B wearing her wedding dress to A's wedding, and it wasn't an accident, and she says if she can prove that in court then I have to pay her back what she paid for the dress. Honestly, it sounds really weird to me, but I'm not the one with a lawyer for a husband. I know he's probably biased, or at least trying to appease her, but he still has a far better grasp of the law than I do. So if he tells her that she can take me to small claims court over this, then I'm preparing for her to take me to small claims court.
Ugh that's ridiculous. I honestly wouldn't worry about it, it's a seriously petty argument on her part and it's such a small amount of money in comparison to fees and whatnot that it genuinely isn't worth it.
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Anonymous #3
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Lol that’s it. Pathetic. Why does she see it as her own success that she married a lawyer? Her husband’s the lawyer, not her. The rest of you guys are actually working for your future instead of just marrying rich. She lives a sad life, looking down upon others and bullying them when she herself has worked for absolutely nothing that she does own. Her husband’s success isn’t her success. Since she has based so much of her self-worth and sense of pride + success on her husband, it will be really tragic if her husband cheats on her or divorces her. I would just cut her off to be honest. Like sorry family and relatives, I’m a student with too much debt and stress to be dealing with stupid people and their bs like this.
(Original post by Anonymous)
She's taken two series of photos her entire life. One decorates the walls of their home. The other one was part of her ex boyfriend's student art project. She says this makes her a professional model. The only actual paying job she had was in my uncle's cafe, and all of us, cousins included, took turns working there, and she always pushed her shifts onto us or just didn't show. She's the worst.
I swear she shows up to any social event ever and she says "hi, like my [expensive designer thing]? i married a lawyer, in case you forgot. are you still single? poor you. i'm worried everyone else in the family will turn into destitute spinsters without following my example" and then leaves, and a week later whoever hosted gets a bill. When she last hosted something a week went by and then we all got separate paypal requests for £50 each, which is what she said a restaurant would have charged for each meal.
In short, she's the exact kind of person to wear her own wedding dress to her sisters wedding because she rejected maid of honour and bridesmaid.

B says that when she saw me and Cousin A talking she believes that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress. In the messages she mentioned the "criminal damage act 1971" and I googled it and it says "a person is guilty of criminal damage if they intentionally or recklessly destroy or damage property belonging to another without lawful excuse." B thinks that A and myself planned me spilling wine on her dress as payback for B wearing her wedding dress to A's wedding, and it wasn't an accident, and she says if she can prove that in court then I have to pay her back what she paid for the dress. Honestly, it sounds really weird to me, but I'm not the one with a lawyer for a husband. I know he's probably biased, or at least trying to appease her, but he still has a far better grasp of the law than I do. So if he tells her that she can take me to small claims court over this, then I'm preparing for her to take me to small claims court.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Lol that’s it. Pathetic. Why does she see it as her own success that she married a lawyer? Her husband’s the lawyer, not her. The rest of you guys are actually working for your future instead of just marrying rich. She lives a sad life, looking down upon others and bullying them when she herself has worked for absolutely nothing that she does own. Her husband’s success isn’t her success. Since she has based so much of her self-worth and sense of pride + success on her husband, it will be really tragic if her husband cheats on her or divorces her. I would just cut her off to be honest. Like sorry family and relatives, I’m a student with too much debt and stress to be dealing with stupid people and their bs like this.
I am debating cutting her off altogether, but as a family we're all really close. Everyone has gotten sick of Cousin B at one point or another but we deal with it because her mum (my aunt) is a really kind woman who sort of holds us all together and makes sure we all see each other if too long goes by without a wedding/funeral/reunion and B's little sister (Cousin C) is a sweet kid who is a little shy at times but ultimately great, and no one has ever had a problem with her, but she loves Cousin B. Honestly, no one is really sure how B is related to her mum and sister, because she's the exact opposite of them. All 3 of them look like the same woman at different stages of her life (they're really scarily similar in appearance) but that's where the resemblance stops. Cousin C and her mum are the best, it's just B that pulls this kind of stuff all the time. Her mum says it's B compensating. B isn't stupid, but her mum says that B feels stupid in comparison to the rest of us, so she looks down her nose at us. Plus, the family is very working class. My grandparents (who are also A B and C's grandparents) and the oldest 2 of my mother's siblings, are all Irish immigrants who worked in factories so when she married an upper middle class lawyer from an upper middle class family, that was basically her villain origin story and she used it as an excuse to turn her nose up at her family. But we love Cousin C and her mum is amazing, so we put up with B for their sakes.
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TheMcSame
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(Original post by FeteOnTheGround)
Please ignore the pedantic idiot above, posting anonomously so they can be an arshole in safety.

That sounds incredibly stressful. I have no idea about the law in this case (perhaps phone the Citizen's Advice Bureau? It doesn't sounds right that they can sue you over something that was clearly an accident and also a really common thing to happen.
I don't think it's massively out of the question to be sued for an accident, hell, being sued doesn't really mean much anyway, you can sue someone for just about anything but it doesn't mean the courts will take it seriously.. That being said, I think she's just playing up knowing that OP knows her hubby is a lawyer.

Best case scenario for the cousin is the OP covering the cleaning bill for the dress. Realistically though, it's most likely an empty threat to con the OP out of some money and even if it isn't an empty threat, the case would most likely get laughed out of court by a judge.

OP: Offer to foot the bill to have the dress cleaned (make this offer through a recorded phone call or by another means that provides evidence such as email, text, etc, just in case it does go to court) because that's about as much as she'd get if any court took a case like this seriously. Look at it this way, if someone damages your car and you were to sue them for the damages, you'd get the amount of money it'd cost to repair said damages, not the money you spent on the car. If it were to go to court (I doubt it would but you never know), you've got evidence that you've tried to rectify the situation with a reasonable offer which certainly helps to push the idea that it was purely an accident and not a malicious action which, again, if it were taken seriously, could mean the difference between a cleaning bill and the case getting dismissed if it wasn't already.

If she doesn't take up your offer, leave it be. Let things pan out.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by TheMcSame)
I don't think it's massively out of the question to be sued for an accident. That being said, I think she's just playing up knowing that OP knows her hubby is a lawyer.

Best case scenario for the cousin is the OP covering the cleaning bill for the dress. Realistically though, it's most likely an empty threat to con the OP out of some money and even if it isn't an empty threat, the case would most likely get laughed out of court by a judge.

OP: Offer to foot the bill to have the dress cleaned (make this offer through a recorded phone call or by another means that provides evidence such as email, text, etc, just in case it does go to court) because that's about as much as she'd get if any court took a case like this seriously. Look at it this way, if someone damages your car and you were to sue them for the damages, you'd get the amount of money it'd cost to repair said damages, not the money you spent on the car. If it were to go to court (I doubt it would but you never know), you've got evidence that you've tried to rectify the situation with a reasonable offer which certainly helps to push the idea that it was purely an accident and not a malicious action which, again, if it were taken seriously, could mean the difference between a cleaning bill and the case getting dismissed if it wasn't already.

If she doesn't take up your offer, leave it be. Let things pan out.
I've got messages between the two of us. I said in the messages that it was an accident but I'd be willing to pay for the cost of cleaning. She said she'd been quoted nearly £1000 and the person who had quoted her that had said it might not come out, she was better off replacing it then spending a grand trying to clean it. I went to a few cleaners near me and told them what happened and showed a picture of the stain and of the three I went to, one said £200, one said £150-250 and the third said probably about £150, but £300 absolute maximum for stains, and even then it would have to be pretty bad. They all agreed that it was fixable but might need a few attempts. When I gave Cousin B my quotes she said she wanted to go to her one, which was 3 or 4 times what the others wanted, because she trusted them more and didn't want another cleaner doing her dress. I'm not sure what to do. The fact is that I can't afford to spend a grand on getting rid of a wine stain, but she's insisting I give her the money and she takes the dress to her cleaners.
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fallen_acorns
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tell them to **** off, and sue you if they want. 9/10 its a bluff, and they are just trying to cheat you out of cash.

If you want to be diplomatic ( I wouldn't) then tell them you will get it sorted for them, and pay for it to be cleaned, but you will choose the place as its you who is paying for it.

That's all I would offer, but as soon as they start to threaten to sue you.. they are not worth having in your life. I can't for the life of me imagine any of my family threatening to sue me for an accident.. its a ridiculous thing to do. After the other things you said about her, she really doesn't seem like someone you want in your life.. so I would politely tell them to go **** themselves, and that if they want the hassle and expense of suing you, go for it.
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