Need some advice Watch

AmazingPhysicist
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I'm an 18-year-old young man living on the outskirts of London. I am currently doing A level exams: maths, chemistry and physics. At the time of typing, I have two exams left: maths statistics and mechanics on Friday 14th June, and chemistry paper 3 on Wednesday 19th June. I am a Catholic (Christian). I believe in God and science. I have no problem with LGBTQ+. I believe that God loves everyone regardless. I applied for Physics MSci (4-year course) at Uni. I got 4 offers. My firm is imperial (A*A*A) and my insurance is UCL (AAA). My faith in God does not disrupt my belief in science. I am worried because I focused too much on my academics. I did so well in GCSEs (9 grades A* and 2 grades A) and I am predicted A*A*A* for my A levels. I focused too much on academics. I am not the average 18-year-old. I have 7 food intolerances (gluten, wheat, dairy, yeast, eggs, soy and nuts). I didn't know this until I was 7 so my growth was stunted. Although I am much better now, I am slim, underweight, have spots on my face, neck and top of my chest, and I'm short (5 foot 8 or 173 cm). I lack social experiences. I don't drink alcoholic drinks on a regular basis. I don't go to parties. I don't like loud music in raving night clubs, I don't like most modern music. I play with LEGO because I find it fun. I read every night before I go to bed. I love all the sciences, technology, engineering, maths, medicine etc. I focused so much on my A levels that I didn't get a driving licence (I've got a provisional but I haven't got lessons yet. I have no experience at all behind a steering wheel, except in Mario Kart Wii), didn't go to parties. I haven't had my first kiss or lost my virginity. I'm physically quite weak, although I have gotten stronger due to eating more and exercising more, I'm still underweight. I don't look 18. I struggle to talk to girls. I've said and done embarrassing things, things that I regret, made too many mistakes and I'm afraid no girl will ever love me. I want to save sex for marriage (it sounds like that's quite rare nowadays) because of 1. I don't think I'm ready and 2. I don't want to do anything that I seriously regret. I'm afraid at Uni people will think I'm a weirdo because I don't like drinking loads, going to parties, raving, loud modern music, having sex or whatever. I'm afraid that I'll make no new friends and have to endure 4 years of Hell. I'm afraid that no girl would ever want to go out with me because I'm not a bad boy, I'm skinny, weak, small, underweight, don't want to have sex before marriage, don't do any other "normal" things other people my age do, and because I believe in one God that apparently doesn't help anyone. It seems that at school most people in my year have had sex, go to parties and love raving and modern music and all that stuff, got drivers licenses and cars, and I've done none of that. I think everyone thinks I'm a weirdo, I'm different. All this makes me feel extremely left out, although I try not to do stupid things. All I want is to do well in my A levels, get a good degree, get a job I'm happy with and pays decently, get driving lessons, a licence and get a car and a place to live, help charities and other good causes make the world a better place for everyone, maybe get married, and live a happy life. I try my best in everything that I do. It just always seems like I'm so different from other people my age that I can never fit in. I'm afraid that I will never be happy and that no girl will ever love me or want to marry me or whatever. I do have friends, but I still feel so different from my age group in general. Any advice?
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black tea
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You will probably meet many people who are similar to you at uni. There will be a christian society where you will meet plenty of like-minded girls who will also want to wait until marriage to have sex, and not all girls are into bad boys. You are not particularly short, and you can work on you physique. You will also learn to drive.

I think you will be fine. Don't worry
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MydaMina
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Honestly, half the things you said I can relate to as well (reading before I go to sleep, not lost my virginity, focus too much on academics). And honestly, you'll be fine, don't worry.
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londonmyst
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I don't think you have much to worry about.
As long as you are approachable and friendly, you will have no difficulty making friends.
London is a fantastic place with so much on offer, plenty to do and so many vastly different perspectives to listen to.
The uni experience is just as much about independent adult life and learning about the world around you, as it is about exam and tuition fees.
Few sane girls wants to put up with a bad boy, guys who are thugs or liars cause a lot of trouble.

With relationships it is important to set clear dealbreakers about the type of person you want to be involved with, the things that you absolutely do not like and the sort of relationship that you want.
Not just romantic relationships, friends and flatmates too.
For example- how do you feel about living with a strict vegan, being friends with somebody who occasionally takes illegal drugs for fun or dating somebody from another religion.
That way you know what you are looking for and also understand want you absolutely do not want.

I have friends who are vegans but I eat meat and couldn't imagine sharing a fridge with a strict vegan flatmate without them expressing some negativity.
I have a silly friend who takes illegal drugs, I disagree with him breaking the law and he knows not to bring any drugs into my home.
I believe in interfaith marriage and have dated guys who are catholic, believe in other religions or are atheists.
Good luck with your exams!
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CarrotVegeta
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(Original post by MydaMina)
Honestly, half the things you said I can relate to as well (reading before I go to sleep, not lost my virginity, focus too much on academics). And honestly, you'll be fine, don't worry.
I can help you with the second thing
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AmazingPhysicist
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I have a few things in mind about what I would want out of a relationship or a marriage. I couldn't imagine sharing a fridge with a vegan either! I have a set of dealbreakers and things I definitely wouldn't want.
(Original post by londonmyst)
I don't think you have much to worry about.
As long as you are approachable and friendly, you will have no difficulty making friends.
London is a fantastic place with so much on offer, plenty to do and so many vastly different perspectives to listen to.
The uni experience is just as much about independent adult life and learning about the world around you, as it is about exam and tuition fees.
Few sane girls wants to put up with a bad boy, guys who are thugs or liars cause a lot of trouble.

With relationships it is important to set clear dealbreakers about the type of person you want to be involved with, the things that you absolutely do not like and the sort of relationship that you want.
Not just romantic relationships, friends and flatmates too.
For example- how do you feel about living with a strict vegan, being friends with somebody who occasionally takes illegal drugs for fun or dating somebody from another religion.
That way you know what you are looking for and also understand want you absolutely do not want.

I have friends who are vegans but I eat meat and couldn't imagine sharing a fridge with a strict vegan flatmate without them expressing some negativity.
I have a silly friend who takes illegal drugs, I disagree with him breaking the law and he knows not to bring any drugs into my home.
I believe in interfaith marriage and have dated guys who are catholic, believe in other religions or are atheists.
Good luck with your exams!
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MydaMina
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LOL, what? This thread isn't for things like that, okay.😂
(Original post by CarrotVegeta)
I can help you with the second thing
Last edited by MydaMina; 5 days ago
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AmazingPhysicist
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Please don't say that. That, in my opinion, is vile and has no place on this thread. I started this thread because I needed some advice, not to get people spitting out immature comments like that.
(Original post by CarrotVegeta)
I can help you with the second thing
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CarrotVegeta
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Apologies, sometimes just can’t help myself but just banter yknow 😭
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Quick-use
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You'll be fine. University is a melting put of multifarious lifestyles. My friendship group got Firsts all around and we never went clubbing and we didn't really sleep around either. We mostly did movie nights/marathons or go to restaurants etc. I have many religious, spiritual, introvert, extrovert, ambivert, party-going, anime-loving and gamer friends among many others.

Don't worry about it - be yourself and be open to others' lifestyles as well.

As an aside, you could consider investing some time reading up on simple writing techniques... Maybe start with paragraphing and sentence connectors/starters.
Last edited by Quick-use; 5 days ago
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