I don't/can't drive - What do you think of me Watch

Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#1
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#1
I don't drive/ can't drive at the moment, I suffer quite badly with anxiety regarding driving, I don't want to make that sound like I quit easily, I've tried on and off for years and at the moment have to admit that it's an issue that I have to work around. Everything else is going good, this is just an issue that keeps bothering me.The main question is what women would think of me regarding the above? I'm 23 and at the stage where I really would like to meet someone seriously (one night stands etc. aren't my thing) but I have the mental block in my head that nobody would want to go out with somebody who can't drive. I fully understand that there is a practical downside of not driving but it's how it is for me at the moment.To give you a bit more information about me I work and can get to pretty much everything I want to do under my own steam, (I have looked at lots of discussions about similar issues with lots saying 'I don't want to ferry him about' - that's why I mention I can get about myself, I wouldn't ask them to run me about apart from if they drove and wanted to drive to something we were doing together) I'm a normal decent guy, I just honestly feel embarrassed about this one area and wondered what anybody thought about it?Thank you.
0
reply
username4355882
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#2
Report 3 months ago
#2
This is not as weird as you are making it out to be. Not driving isn't that big of a deal.

Build up on that confidence and it shouldn't be a problem.
1
reply
Drewski
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#3
Report 3 months ago
#3
For 99% of people it's not going to be an issue, especially if you live in a reasonably big city.
2
reply
claireestelle
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#4
Report 3 months ago
#4
(Original post by Sam_b_1)
I don't drive/ can't drive at the moment, I suffer quite badly with anxiety regarding driving, I don't want to make that sound like I quit easily, I've tried on and off for years and at the moment have to admit that it's an issue that I have to work around. Everything else is going good, this is just an issue that keeps bothering me.The main question is what women would think of me regarding the above? I'm 23 and at the stage where I really would like to meet someone seriously (one night stands etc. aren't my thing) but I have the mental block in my head that nobody would want to go out with somebody who can't drive. I fully understand that there is a practical downside of not driving but it's how it is for me at the moment.To give you a bit more information about me I work and can get to pretty much everything I want to do under my own steam, (I have looked at lots of discussions about similar issues with lots saying 'I don't want to ferry him about' - that's why I mention I can get about myself, I wouldn't ask them to run me about apart from if they drove and wanted to drive to something we were doing together) I'm a normal decent guy, I just honestly feel embarrassed about this one area and wondered what anybody thought about it?Thank you.
24 and can't drive because of my dyspraxia making it too dangerous to do. I m married so it's not really been an issue at all for me, just can't get some jobs you need a licence for.
1
reply
the bear
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#5
Report 3 months ago
#5
only a shallow person would judge you on your driving skilz

:console:
1
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#6
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#6
Thanks, means quite a lot for somebody to say that.


(Original post by batter mix)
This is not as weird as you are making it out to be. Not driving isn't that big of a deal.

Build up on that confidence and it shouldn't be a problem.
0
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#7
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#7
Thanks
0
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#8
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#8
Thanks a lot, hope the dyspraxia isn't too much of a day to day issue for you. Sam
(Original post by claireestelle)
24 and can't drive because of my dyspraxia making it too dangerous to do. I m married so it's not really been an issue at all for me, just can't get some jobs you need a licence for.
0
reply
hehe_x
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#9
Report 3 months ago
#9
As long as not being able to drive isn't having negative effects on you, mentally or logistically, don't worry about what anybody else thinks, that's none of their business. And it isn't really a big deal x
1
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#10
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#10
Thank you!
(Original post by the bear)
only a shallow person would judge you on your driving skilz

:console:
0
reply
sinfonietta
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#11
Report 3 months ago
#11
No opinion.

I had the opposite issue with an ex. He could drive, knew I couldn't, and always insisted on driving me about even though I told him I didn't want that. It once got to the point he tracked me down and yelled at me in the street when he found out I'd taken the train to go food shopping instead of calling him for a lift.
1
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#12
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#12
Thanks a lot for that, suppose as long as it worked for me and her I wouldn't care what anyone else thought. Thanks

(Original post by hehe_x)
As long as not being able to drive isn't having negative effects on you, mentally or logistically, don't worry about what anybody else thinks, that's none of their business. And it isn't really a big deal x
0
reply
claireestelle
Badges: 22
Rep:
?
#13
Report 3 months ago
#13
(Original post by Sam_b_1)
Thanks a lot, hope the dyspraxia isn't too much of a day to day issue for you. Sam
I've had it since i was born so although it is an issue, i m used to it
0
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#14
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#14
Sorry that doesn't sound good. Thanks for the answer.
(Original post by sinfonietta)
No opinion.

I had the opposite issue with an ex. He could drive, knew I couldn't, and always insisted on driving me about even though I told him I didn't want that. It once got to the point he tracked me down and yelled at me in the street when he found out I'd taken the train to go food shopping instead of calling him for a lift.
0
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#15
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#15
(Original post by claireestelle)
I've had it since i was born so although it is an issue, i m used to it
I know somebody who has it too, she doesn't drive but manages fine day to day. Although she's said the dyspraxia can be a pain for a few bits she doesn't see it as a problem, she's fantastic at art, textiles, baking etc which is what she loves to do, therefore it's not a problem. Hope your well, Sam.
1
reply
jayeshforce1
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#16
Report 3 months ago
#16
(Original post by Sam_b_1)
I don't drive/ can't drive at the moment, I suffer quite badly with anxiety regarding driving, I don't want to make that sound like I quit easily, I've tried on and off for years and at the moment have to admit that it's an issue that I have to work around. Everything else is going good, this is just an issue that keeps bothering me.The main question is what women would think of me regarding the above? I'm 23 and at the stage where I really would like to meet someone seriously (one night stands etc. aren't my thing) but I have the mental block in my head that nobody would want to go out with somebody who can't drive. I fully understand that there is a practical downside of not driving but it's how it is for me at the moment.To give you a bit more information about me I work and can get to pretty much everything I want to do under my own steam, (I have looked at lots of discussions about similar issues with lots saying 'I don't want to ferry him about' - that's why I mention I can get about myself, I wouldn't ask them to run me about apart from if they drove and wanted to drive to something we were doing together) I'm a normal decent guy, I just honestly feel embarrassed about this one area and wondered what anybody thought about it?Thank you.
I am 20, been driving since i was 18 and i can confidently say that there are literally no upside to relationships with regards to being able to drive. If anything i got worse with women since i started driving lol. This is especially true if you live in a major city where public transport is decent and or happen to be university student. The only advantages (in my opinion) to being able to drive are: A) Being able to get up and go where ever your heart desires whenever it desires. B) Do bulk shopping at university. I know you didn't ask for driving advice but i would recommend playing driving games with those steering wheel like controller. I recommended that to my friend who was scared of driving after being in a car crash as a child and it helped him. He now drives. Anyway hope this helps.
1
reply
Sam_b_1
Badges: 6
Rep:
?
#17
Report Thread starter 3 months ago
#17
Thanks for the reply! I live on the edge of a reasonably sized town so transport is good(ish), train connection, lots of taxi services, buses to other towns, every 10 minutes into the nearest city and I walk a lot over the week. (By choice I like walking if I can anyway, irrespective of the driving 'issue')

I think I see the issue as a big problem because in a lot of ways I feel like I'm expected to drive. (lots of people, generally older people ask why not and are like 'oh right' even though it has zero impact on their lives) Maybe I see it out of proportion as I was never that bothered about driving but thought it was something I would do when I could, when it got to the point of realising it wasn't going to happen it made me feel like I'd let myself down somehow. Anyway, thanks for the kind words, having people say it's not a big deal has given me a confidence boost.

p.s. Hope you have more 'success' on the relationship part!
(Original post by jayeshforce1)
I am 20, been driving since i was 18 and i can confidently say that there are literally no upside to relationships with regards to being able to drive. If anything i got worse with women since i started driving lol. This is especially true if you live in a major city where public transport is decent and or happen to be university student. The only advantages (in my opinion) to being able to drive are: A) Being able to get up and go where ever your heart desires whenever it desires. B) Do bulk shopping at university. I know you didn't ask for driving advice but i would recommend playing driving games with those steering wheel like controller. I recommended that to my friend who was scared of driving after being in a car crash as a child and it helped him. He now drives. Anyway hope this helps.
0
reply
Oxford Mum
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#18
Report 3 months ago
#18
I didn’t pass my test until the age of 22 and it took me 60 lessons. I am a terribly nervous driver and people I know don’t like being driven by me because I am so timid. I can relate to you so much. If you live in London you may never have to drive. I only forced myself to drive because I found a job that was 3 bus journeys away. Now I live in a secluded village so am glad I learned. Any girl who doesn’t want you because of this isn’t worth it. Big hugs from me xxx
1
reply
OctoberRain7
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#19
Report 3 months ago
#19
(Original post by claireestelle)
24 and can't drive because of my dyspraxia making it too dangerous to do. I m married so it's not really been an issue at all for me, just can't get some jobs you need a licence for.
Hi, I also have dyspraxia and I’m learning to drive at the moment. The way mine is I am able to learn but it will take a long time but I’m stubborn and I’m going to learn if it kills me essentially. I was just wondering if you ever tried learning or just assumed that you couldn’t?
1
reply
Precious Illusions
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#20
Report 3 months ago
#20
I'm 25. Never learned to drive. Don't give a ****.
1
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Why wouldn't you turn to teachers if you were being bullied?

They might tell my parents (23)
6.73%
They might tell the bully (33)
9.65%
I don't think they'd understand (52)
15.2%
It might lead to more bullying (132)
38.6%
There's nothing they could do (102)
29.82%

Watched Threads

View All