Messed up with my girlfriend Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#1
I booked a trip for us which we were due to go in a couple of days. I wanted to keep the destination a surprise but I told my gf to keep the dates free. However, since booking it I've had a lot of things coming up at work which I really need to prioritise.

This was going to be our first holiday together but I've had to cancel it. I wasn't sure if she'd actually forgotten about it as she hasn't mentioned it since I booked it, but she could've been waiting for me to mention more...particularly as she knew it was all going to be a nice surprise. Today she asked me if we are still going away and I told her how I had to cancel it and struggled to tell her because I didn't want to let her down. She is upset because I didn't update her whatsoever let alone tell her I had to cancel. She also understands the pressure I'm under, but she has told me she wants to be left alone for a few days.

It doesn't help that the last few weeks she has been quite ill and had a lot going on in her personal life. I do feel bad. Is her reaction normal? What should I do?
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#2
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#2
Bump
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#3
??
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
TSavannahLFCx
Badges: 5
Rep:
?
#4
Report 3 weeks ago
#4
That's life.
1
reply
camembertqueen
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#5
Report 3 weeks ago
#5
Give her a few days
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
shadowdweller
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#6
Report 3 weeks ago
#6
I think it's normal for her to be upset that you didn't update her, yeah - you told her to keep the dates free, so if plans changed you should have told her that too!

Personally I'd say send a message to say sorry if you haven't already, and then suggest a time when you could go on holiday to make up for it? I'd suggest making it clear that you understand she needs some time alone, and that you don't expect her to reply yet. But at least that way she knows that going away is still a priority for you both?
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
1
reply
Anonymous #2
#7
Report 3 weeks ago
#7
i dont think she would have minded if you cancelled she would have been upset for a day then got over it. its the fact that you wasnt honest with her. express to her that you understand that you should have kept her in the loop and been honest instead of geting her hopes up and then having to tell her last minute. also she had to ask you if you were still going rather than you telling her and if my boyf did that id be pi**ed off. say your sorry and you know where you went wrong and that youl make it upto her then shell be okay.
0
reply
bones-mccoy
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#8
Report 3 weeks ago
#8
Yeah you kinda led her on by not telling her you'd had to cancel. I know I'd be annoyed if I was under the impression I was going on a nice holiday and then was told it wasn't happening last minute. Give her time, book something else and she'll be fine.
0
reply
Daisyxoxo
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#9
Report 3 weeks ago
#9
Its just one of those annoying things that happen when you’re an adult unfortunately. She’ll understandably be disappointed about it and you’ll probably need to give her space until she’s feeling better. But, she most likely won’t break up with you for something like that - you just be really apologetic, organise something new and make sure you follow through next time and maker her the priority as she may start to resent you if you don’t.
1
reply
----_----
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#10
Report 3 weeks ago
#10
ok ngl I think she's being a bit dramatic with the whole leave me alone for 3 days but yeh I mean other than that her frustration is understandable.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
1
reply
Mimi9335
Badges: 15
Rep:
?
#11
Report 3 weeks ago
#11
(Original post by ----_----)
ok ngl I think she's being a bit dramatic with the whole leave me alone for 3 days but yeh I mean other than that her frustration is understandable.
lmao yeah it is a little too dramatic, he shouldve told her but like it's not thaaat big of a deal that it's canceled last min. i get that she might have packed or whatever but she could have been a bit more understanding. OP feels at fault for the right reasons but the way she handled the situation is terrible
1
reply
Jasyy
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#12
Report 3 weeks ago
#12
You should have told her in advance
and I am not sure what type of work you do but the people I know normally bring their laptops with them and do their work during holidays
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 3 weeks ago
#13
(Original post by ----_----)
ok ngl I think she's being a bit dramatic with the whole leave me alone for 3 days but yeh I mean other than that her frustration is understandable.
She said a few days, not three
0
reply
Anonymous #3
#14
Report 3 weeks ago
#14
give her time ...do keep on updating her about ur daily life and ask about her health ....if u see things getting out of control then u shld do something about it
(Original post by Anonymous)
I booked a trip for us which we were due to go in a couple of days. I wanted to keep the destination a surprise but I told my gf to keep the dates free. However, since booking it I've had a lot of things coming up at work which I really need to prioritise.

This was going to be our first holiday together but I've had to cancel it. I wasn't sure if she'd actually forgotten about it as she hasn't mentioned it since I booked it, but she could've been waiting for me to mention more...particularly as she knew it was all going to be a nice surprise. Today she asked me if we are still going away and I told her how I had to cancel it and struggled to tell her because I didn't want to let her down. She is upset because I didn't update her whatsoever let alone tell her I had to cancel. She also understands the pressure I'm under, but she has told me she wants to be left alone for a few days.

It doesn't help that the last few weeks she has been quite ill and had a lot going on in her personal life. I do feel bad. Is her reaction normal? What should I do?
0
reply
camembertqueen
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#15
Report 3 weeks ago
#15
Give her a few days
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
----_----
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#16
Report 3 weeks ago
#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
She said a few days, not three
so more than 3 days lmao, that doesnt change my point x
0
reply
Lilli22
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#17
Report 3 weeks ago
#17
Yes, I think it's strange that you didn't update her. Give her some time, and, after that, explain yourself to her. Though, most importantly, emphasise with her and show her that you understand her feelings. Communication and respect for one another are absolutely CRUCIAL to a good relationship.

Don't worry about it. Just be nice.
1
reply
Jennie1987
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#18
Report 3 weeks ago
#18
Completely normal!! In fact this is good in a way - as in its not worse, shes not ranting and raving instead she is giving herself time to process it and how you react in pressure situations. I would feel very low if it happened to me, and that's in a big way down to how you handled it and how you put your feelings of anxiety over her reaction over her feelings of being included. A surprise is one thing but withholding the fact that you cancelled is more like covering it up? Leading her on? I honestly think it will all be fine, depending if you have other issues going on that this touches on, but you should make it up to her and let her know you're thinking of her while she has space...as in a couple of times a day, short and sweet, and apologetic
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Are you tempted to change your firm university choice now or on A-level results day?

Yes, I'll try and go to a uni higher up the league tables (131)
19.38%
Yes, there is a uni that I prefer and I'll fit in better (66)
9.76%
No I am happy with my course choice (383)
56.66%
I'm using Clearing when I have my exam results (96)
14.2%

Watched Threads

View All