The situation with my ex just keeps getting worse and worse

We broke up 3 months ago, we tried are absolutely hardest to get back together. But it was his life that got in the way every time, his mental health, his dream job (the army), the distance, his family..etc etc. The biggest one that got in the way was his mental health, he loved me one minute then felt nothing the next. The other biggest one is the army, he's leaving in September and we won't ever talk again...ever again after that. The other biggest massive one that has always been in the way since day 1, the distance (that speaks for itself).

He told me last weekend he loved me so much, and then yesterday things got really complicated...he likes another girl (he started liking her on Monday), she's nearer to him, she makes him happy, but he said they can't be together cause there's no point if he's leaving in September. That hurt me so so so much, he told me he loved me then go likes another girl.

Then suddenly says he had to "force love me" so i can be happy. Which is pretty pathetic, he could've just said he didn't love me rather than lying every time he said it. He had to force love me...like do u know how that makes me feel pretty dam sh**.

He then said I love u as a friend, I love u so much as the best friend in my life. He's been lying to me since we broke up. Then he goes likes another girl cause it's ruining him forcing to love me. I didn't ask him to force love me did i! I Lost a great guy to him. I and the other guy could be dating rn if I didn't believe him.

Ugh idk what to do. We can't even be together, we won't ever talk again (well so he says) when he leaves for training in September. So what's the actual point in trying with a guy that's causing me so so much pain, so much stress. He's ruined my life basically. Apparently, this was all my fault when all i did was love him and drained my energy to make him happy.

UGH. What do i do?

Joining the army doesn't mean he can't have a relationship. That's just an excuse.

Block him. Nothing good can come from further contact with this person.

Reply 2

ashleyjohnloves

7

I agree with sinfonietta. It's an excuse; I know guys who still have relationships while being in the army. So that's BS. You need to block him and focus on yourself. A person who says they only pretended to love you and didn't feel anything and lied to you all this time, whether it is true or not, they're not in the right mental head space. You run from those people because it's those type of people who can drag you down mentally and emotionally. You already feel bad as it is, you don't need him to reiterate that statement. There is no future in that relationship and no point in even wasting another second on him. He is not worth your time. Take care of yourself and focus on your goals in life. Don't feel bad about what he told you, you did what you could for the relationship and he simply sabotaged your guys's relationship in the end. I've been in this position and it took a major toll on my self esteem, and it took me a while to gain it back. Don't let some dufus do that to you. It's a life lesson to learn from and grow from.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Thank you so much! yeah i agree...

Original post by ashleyjohnloves

I agree with sinfonietta. It's an excuse; I know guys who still have relationships while being in the army. So that's BS. You need to block him and focus on yourself. A person who says they only pretended to love you and didn't feel anything and lied to you all this time, whether it is true or not, they're not in the right mental head space. You run from those people because it's those type of people who can drag you down mentally and emotionally. You already feel bad as it is, you don't need him to reiterate that statement. There is no future in that relationship and no point in even wasting another second on him. He is not worth your time. Take care of yourself and focus on your goals in life. Don't feel bad about what he told you, you did what you could for the relationship and he simply sabotaged your guys's relationship in the end. I've been in this position and it took a major toll on my self esteem, and it took me a while to gain it back. Don't let some dufus do that to you. It's a life lesson to learn from and grow from.

Reply 4

Dunnig Kruger

16

"He's ruined my life basically."

I've had my life ruined six times then. :bird:

If a failed relationship equals a ruined life.
Except I haven't had my life ruined at all!
I have been sad or stressed when love has evaporated, but never ruined. If I have never been ruined I don't see why you should be now.

You should be facing the future with some optimism. Find yourself another great guy like the one you missed out on (I am confident you can do it). Focus on the present, not the past.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

yeah that's true...yeah thank you. tried another guy, turned out like the first one. just gotta keep moving forward. right? x

Original post by Dunnig Kruger

"He's ruined my life basically."

I've had my life ruined six times then. :bird:

If a failed relationship equals a ruined life.
Except I haven't had my life ruined at all!
I have been sad or stressed when love has evaporated, but never ruined. If I have never been ruined I don't see why you should be now.

You should be facing the future with some optimism. Find yourself another great guy like the one you missed out on (I am confident you can do it). Focus on the present, not the past.

The situation with my ex just keeps getting worse and worse

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