Can ED be easily overcome? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 2 weeks ago
#1
So my boyfriend has ED caused by anxiety. We have tried to have penetrative sex twice, both of which times he has struggled to maintain it. When we do other sexual activities such as oral he is fine and can last a while before orgasm. but it’s just when we decide to actually have sex (penetrative I mean) he ends up nervous and tense and can’t keep it. There are a lot of potential causes for this:
- struggling with condom
- performance anxiety
- lack of foreplay
- maybe I also come across nervous
- we anticipate actual sex to much and sort of plan it rather than being more spontaneous and so we build it up in our heads and when it actually comes to it it becomes forced and awkward

I just want some advice. When we have tried it, we used condoms but he says they felt a little tight (could this have something ti do with it)
And although it’s only happened the two times, he said this had occurred with him ex and also that we are frequently very sexually active, doing other stuff. We have been dating for nearly 5 months and are very familiar with each other’s bodies and what gives pleasure and what doesn’t. What I want to know is is ED something that can go away just by relaxing a but more, or is it more medical than that? Will it take a while to overcome? What can we do to make it easier?
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Jang Gwangnam
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#2
Report 2 weeks ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
So my boyfriend has ED caused by anxiety. We have tried to have penetrative sex twice, both of which times he has struggled to maintain it. When we do other sexual activities such as oral he is fine and can last a while before orgasm. but it’s just when we decide to actually have sex (penetrative I mean) he ends up nervous and tense and can’t keep it. There are a lot of potential causes for this:
- struggling with condom
- performance anxiety
- lack of foreplay
- maybe I also come across nervous
- we anticipate actual sex to much and sort of plan it rather than being more spontaneous and so we build it up in our heads and when it actually comes to it it becomes forced and awkward

I just want some advice. When we have tried it, we used condoms but he says they felt a little tight (could this have something ti do with it)
And although it’s only happened the two times, he said this had occurred with him ex and also that we are frequently very sexually active, doing other stuff. We have been dating for nearly 5 months and are very familiar with each other’s bodies and what gives pleasure and what doesn’t. What I want to know is is ED something that can go away just by relaxing a but more, or is it more medical than that? Will it take a while to overcome? What can we do to make it easier?
Well erectile dysfunction in your BF's case is both a physical & mental issue.

I have a feeling that performance anxiety and nervousness is getting to his head too much which leads to him being turned off - either that or he's using this as an excuse to go bareback (imo don't risk it).

There's many different types of medicines (e.g. Viagra) and diets (primarily the high in Zinc diets) he can take to help sustain an erection and be more sexually active. Indeed foreplay plays a part so maybe try harder on your end to get your lust through (e.g. Dirty talk or more kissing and eye contact) and make him feel dominant (most men like this feeling).

Oh and last but not least don't give him hate for not being able to hold one, that'll only worsen the problem as he'll feel useless and insignificant which will only aid towards him feeling self loath thus damaging your relationship.

NOTE: I'm by no means an expert, tbh I just read around a lot on the subject since I'm worried i got ED from watching porn for too many years. So just tell your BF he ain't alone.
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Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 2 weeks ago
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(Original post by Jang Gwangnam)
Well erectile dysfunction in your BF's case is both a physical & mental issue.

I have a feeling that performance anxiety and nervousness is getting to his head too much which leads to him being turned off - either that or he's using this as an excuse to go bareback (imo don't risk it).

There's many different types of medicines (e.g. Viagra) and diets (primarily the high in Zinc diets) he can take to help sustain an erection and be more sexually active. Indeed foreplay plays a part so maybe try harder on your end to get your lust through (e.g. Dirty talk or more kissing and eye contact) and make him feel dominant (most men like this feeling).

Oh and last but not least don't give him hate for not being able to hold one, that'll only worsen the problem as he'll feel useless and insignificant which will only aid towards him feeling self loath thus damaging your relationship.

NOTE: I'm by no means an expert, tbh I just read around a lot on the subject since I'm worried i got ED from watching porn for too many years. So just tell your BF he ain't alone.
He said he wouldn’t do it without a condom so that’s alright. But yeah I think next time we should try for foreplay and and a little more spontaneity to it, rather than sorta planning it which just leads to anticipation.
I never would give him hate though. Whenever it would happen it would just stress him out more and he’d get kinda frustrated and say he was disappointed me. I would explain how it didn’t matter as to me sex is more of an emotional thing than a satisfying thing. As long as I’m just being intimate with him, I’m okay. I think it’s also the pressure of him wanting to do it since we’re both technically virgins, so towards the beginning we kinda wanted to do it as soon as possible and get it out the way. We’ve also taken that pressure off by saying we’re in no rush and that it’ll happen when it’ll happen. The only reason we haven’t tried again in a while is because we keep forgetting to buy condoms, but I’d never do it without and neither would he.
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mgi
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(Original post by Anonymous)
He said he wouldn’t do it without a condom so that’s alright. But yeah I think next time we should try for foreplay and and a little more spontaneity to it, rather than sorta planning it which just leads to anticipation.
I never would give him hate though. Whenever it would happen it would just stress him out more and he’d get kinda frustrated and say he was disappointed me. I would explain how it didn’t matter as to me sex is more of an emotional thing than a satisfying thing. As long as I’m just being intimate with him, I’m okay. I think it’s also the pressure of him wanting to do it since we’re both technically virgins, so towards the beginning we kinda wanted to do it as soon as possible and get it out the way. We’ve also taken that pressure off by saying we’re in no rush and that it’ll happen when it’ll happen. The only reason we haven’t tried again in a while is because we keep forgetting to buy condoms, but I’d never do it without and neither would he.
The best way is for you to both be patient and also buold a good relationship outside of the bedroom. You can also do a lot more foreplay both inside and outside of the bedroom. What about have a bath or showrr together. When did you last give him a full body massage followed by a bj etc. Plwasure yourself while watches etc . use yiur imagination and reduce the importance of penetration for a while. Let him build some sexual confidence. You can do cowgirl etc Take your time with each other. Virgins are understsndably often clueless! Take it slow!
Last edited by mgi; 4 days ago
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