My friend is not okay Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 week ago
#1
basically ever since last Christmas my friend has lost a significant amount of weight and has changed. She would often have several days off sixth form and in February/March this year had 3 weeks off school due to 'family issues'. Now that our A-level exams are over I have only seen her once outside of school and she barely messages me. For the last few weeks I have been contacting her and messaging her to see if she is okay and if she wants to meet up and chat but she doesn't seem to want to go out although she says she does. Whenever I ask her to go out she says that she cant and is busy or says that she has some family issues to deal with, yet when she sends me pictures on snap or post things shes either at home doing nothing. Out of our friend group she only goes out with one of them (I'm going to call her person A, lol) but she rarely meets her. I know she hasn't been eating and sleeping well and there is obviously something wrong with her and I want to help her, but I'm not sure how and I feel like she doesn't want to be friends with me either. Also, I have noticed that whenever she goes out with person A, person A tries to say bad things about us and almost turn my friend against the rest our friend group (this has happened a few times). However my friend and person A are best friends yet my friend cant see this so I'm not sure what to do about that either. Any ideas on how I should deal with this situation?
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sinfonietta
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#2
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Do nothing. You can't help someone who isn't ready to accept help.

Also if she doesn't want to be your friend anymore you need to acknowledge this and back off - not try to force yourself into the situation to fix her problems. If/when she asks for help it'll be someone she's closer to and trusts.
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Last edited by sinfonietta; 1 week ago
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jungles
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You could try ringing her and explain you're worried about her and hope everything's okay.
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Satanks
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Sounds like person A could be doing a lousy job of getting her out of this, or making it worse for personal gain. But who knows. Best advice I can give is be honest, say you're worried about her being absent and ask if she's alright? She might say she's fine, but if she isn't, at least she knows someone is noticing and cares. Sounds like depression, maybe agoraphobia. Who knows. You gotta let her go through it herself, dont get made or accusing, just be there for her. If you need to wait, you need to wait.
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