How long is enough? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#1
When a guy needs time to seriously think about where your relationship is headed, how long should you give him? We have an on again off again relationship. Right now we both know enough is enough, we have to decide what we want. I said I want him, only him forever. Him on the other hand, he said he needs time to think. It’s been just under a month. We speak everyday, just not the way we use to. We’re getting back into things. Slowly. How long do you think he will need until he has his answer? Do I give it till the end of Summer? It’s just a difficult position to be in. Waiting for someone on whether they want it to be permanent with you or not. I understand it’s a hard decision but at the same time, it wasn’t a difficult one for me. I guess that’s what hurts. So help on how long do you think he would need? A month, a year, what..
0
reply
ecolier
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#2
Report 6 days ago
#2
I really thought you were asking about something else.

:getmecoat:
6
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#3
(Original post by ecolier)
I really thought you were asking about something else.

:getmecoat:
Is there any chance you could help me out anyway?
0
reply
ecolier
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#4
Report 6 days ago
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
Is there any chance you could help me out anyway?
Either he tells you an answer, or you get sick of waiting - whichever is shorter.
Last edited by ecolier; 6 days ago
1
reply
UWS
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#5
Report 6 days ago
#5
This is like the whole "how long is a piece of string?" phrase.

How ever long you're willing to wait. If you've been on and off, it's probably likely to continue. He might make his decision but he might not, you've got to push for an answer eventually. Give it a few weeks but don't waste months chasing someone who can't decide whether to be with you or not.
0
reply
mangofarmer
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#6
Report 6 days ago
#6
(Original post by ecolier)
i really thought you were asking about something else.

:getmecoat:
sameeeeee
0
reply
mangofarmer
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#7
Report 6 days ago
#7
Is it okay if I stan you based on your profile picture alone?
(Original post by UWS)
This is like the whole "how long is a piece of string?" phrase.

How ever long you're willing to wait. If you've been on and off, it's probably likely to continue. He might make his decision but he might not, you've got to push for an answer eventually. Give it a few weeks but don't waste months chasing someone who can't decide whether to be with you or not.
0
reply
xoxAngel_Kxox
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#8
Report 6 days ago
#8
People have differing opinions when it comes to this, but I've always been of the opinion that if it isn't immediately obvious to a guy that he wants to be with me - if he needs time to think about whether he wants me or not - he doesn't want me enough.

Doubts now could bring further doubts down the line, and I wouldn't accept someone taking weeks or months to "think" about it.
2
reply
Jennie1987
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#9
Report 6 days ago
#9
(Original post by xoxAngel_Kxox)
People have differing opinions when it comes to this, but I've always been of the opinion that if it isn't immediately obvious to a guy that he wants to be with me - if he needs time to think about whether he wants me or not - he doesn't want me enough.

Doubts now could bring further doubts down the line, and I wouldn't accept someone taking weeks or months to "think" about it.
I agree 100% from start to finish :yep:
1
reply
WhyKidz
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#10
Report 6 days ago
#10
Depends how long you've been together, I'd been with my ex a long time and when she wasn't sure I gave her a few months and then when she said she was cheating on me I gave her a few weeks (with a hard deadline) and when she couldn't decide, then it was a case of not choosing to stay together ... so we broke up.
0
reply
Hiro2468
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#11
Report 6 days ago
#11
I ain't no relationship expert so don't take what I'm saying too seriously but seriously, imo respect yourself enough to know your worth and not accept less than you deserve.

You shouldn't let his indecisiveness lower your standards from what you deserve. What if in the future he's having doubts. He should know what he wants and if not then does he really want you as much as you want him?

Again I ain't no expert so I'm sorry if I wasn't helpful (>_< )
0
reply
Tawny007
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#12
Report 6 days ago
#12
I've been in this position before and I agree with a couple of others who have answered you.
I wouldn't be willing to wait around, for someone that I am completely ready to commit to, for them to decide as to whether they want me or not.
If you have been on and off for a while it sounds like that will probably continue if he isn't sure whether to commit to just you.
In your shoes I'd probably leave it, it's just going to eat you up inside that he isn't choosing you and you have already laid down all of your cards and chose him.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
1
reply
Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#13
Thank you all so much for replying, I truly accept and understand your advice. This has gone on for about 6 years, going onto 7. He’s been such a big part of my life.

The reason why I’m giving him this time is because in the past, it was roles reversed, and he was the one waiting. It’s been a complicated relationship to say the least. But after everything to the point where we are now, I do feel like yeah I should respect myself and not even give him this opportunity but I really do love him. And I know he loves me too. I can’t speak on his behalf but I know I would regret it if I just left him right now. It is eating me up inside for sure but I feel like he’s my soul mate. I’ll be starting Uni soon, and if by the early months nothing happens, I’m gonna set it straight with him..

Thanks again everyone. I really didn’t have much people to speak to about this so thanks. I really appreciate it.
0
reply
Tawny007
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#14
Report 6 days ago
#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
Thank you all so much for replying, I truly accept and understand your advice. This has gone on for about 6 years, going onto 7. He’s been such a big part of my life.

The reason why I’m giving him this time is because in the past, it was roles reversed, and he was the one waiting. It’s been a complicated relationship to say the least. But after everything to the point where we are now, I do feel like yeah I should respect myself and not even give him this opportunity but I really do love him. And I know he loves me too. I can’t speak on his behalf but I know I would regret it if I just left him right now. It is eating me up inside for sure but I feel like he’s my soul mate. I’ll be starting Uni soon, and if by the early months nothing happens, I’m gonna set it straight with him..

Thanks again everyone. I really didn’t have much people to speak to about this so thanks. I really appreciate it.
Hope it all works out the way you want it
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Hiro2468
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#15
Report 5 days ago
#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
Thank you all so much for replying, I truly accept and understand your advice. This has gone on for about 6 years, going onto 7. He’s been such a big part of my life.

The reason why I’m giving him this time is because in the past, it was roles reversed, and he was the one waiting. It’s been a complicated relationship to say the least. But after everything to the point where we are now, I do feel like yeah I should respect myself and not even give him this opportunity but I really do love him. And I know he loves me too. I can’t speak on his behalf but I know I would regret it if I just left him right now. It is eating me up inside for sure but I feel like he’s my soul mate. I’ll be starting Uni soon, and if by the early months nothing happens, I’m gonna set it straight with him..

Thanks again everyone. I really didn’t have much people to speak to about this so thanks. I really appreciate it.
Good luck!👍
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Are you tempted to change your firm university choice now or on A-level results day?

Yes, I'll try and go to a uni higher up the league tables (131)
18.9%
Yes, there is a uni that I prefer and I'll fit in better (69)
9.96%
No I am happy with my course choice (395)
57%
I'm using Clearing when I have my exam results (98)
14.14%

Watched Threads

View All