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Was this sexual assault?

A few days ago, an old neighbor from when I was 13 years old saw me out at the shopping center. I saw him as well but I didn't say hi because I don't speak to him or his family. This brought to my mind an incident that happened when I was 13 (I'm currently 23). I was in my little brother's room with my neighbor (he was 15 at the time). It was late at night and my mother was already in bed. My brother and him were playing video games and I joined them for a while. I don't remember this next part but I think my brother and him were play fighting. Next thing I know he grabs my head and shoves it down to where his balls were. He had shorts on but my face was literally buried there. I punched him and he let go of me and I went to the living room to cry. I felt so disgusting. After that I never spoke to him again. Prior to that he would sneak into my room in the morning when him and my brother were hanging out. He would crawl into my bed to scare me and would get close to me. It was very uncomfortable. Would you consider this assault?
It does seem like assault but given the circumstances it would be VERY difficult to do anything about it. As unfortunate as it may or may not seem, his intentions would be very hard to prove given how long ago it was. Make what you want of it I'm just giving my judgement based on what you have given.
Oh and chances are (if no sexual malice was intended) that he has probably forgotten about it by now.
Original post by Anonymous
A few days ago, an old neighbor from when I was 13 years old saw me out at the shopping center. I saw him as well but I didn't say hi because I don't speak to him or his family. This brought to my mind an incident that happened when I was 13 (I'm currently 23). I was in my little brother's room with my neighbor (he was 15 at the time). It was late at night and my mother was already in bed. My brother and him were playing video games and I joined them for a while. I don't remember this next part but I think my brother and him were play fighting. Next thing I know he grabs my head and shoves it down to where his balls were. He had shorts on but my face was literally buried there. I punched him and he let go of me and I went to the living room to cry. I felt so disgusting. After that I never spoke to him again. Prior to that he would sneak into my room in the morning when him and my brother were hanging out. He would crawl into my bed to scare me and would get close to me. It was very uncomfortable. Would you consider this assault?


In most circumstances, yes.

But given you were all kids and you were already playfighting, you'd struggle to come up with a case for that being sexual assault, especially given you were all fully clothed and it presumably didn't last more than seconds.
Hard to say... was there any sexual connotation to It? You were wrestling and stuff. It doesn't sound like he ever tried to do anything in bed with you. He may not have intended anything sexual with this. Just having a laugh with the kid sister of his friend. However if it's had an effect on you that's totally legitimate and you're allowed to feel that. Maybe talk to someone about it if it's upsetting you.
Reply 4
I did try to but I was much smaller at the time and he was a full grown teenager. I did hit him so he would let go of me. I was 12-13. I only told two close friends because I felt disgusted. I didn't tell my mother until we moved out because at the time I just didn't know how to tell her. My mother is a single mom and she worked a lot, and I would take care of my little brother. Our neighbor was best friends with him (more like a father figure to my little brother) and would come over every single day during summer break. I did not like this neighbor or his family, I always felt something was off with them, but my brother would invite him all the time. My mom and them were close because we come from the same country. That's why we were close. As for him crawling into my bed, keep in mind this was a grown guy. He was not a scrony 15 year old guy at all. He had a crush on me but I was not into him at all.
Original post by Anonymous
Your head was buried in his genital area... 😹 why didn't you fight back? It seems like you were weak... crying in another room. Didn't you report it to your family? Parents? Anyone?

What made him crawl into your bed? Was this part of a joke thing he did?

Why were you even close to your neighbours. Seems odd.

Whole situation seems SKETCHYYYY 🥴
Original post by Anonymous
Your head was buried in his genital area... 😹 why didn't you fight back? It seems like you were weak... crying in another room. Didn't you report it to your family? Parents? Anyone?

What made him crawl into your bed? Was this part of a joke thing he did?

Why were you even close to your neighbours. Seems odd.

Whole situation seems SKETCHYYYY 🥴


Why didn't you fight back?? Are you being serious?? That could possibly be the absolute worst thing you could ever, ever ask a victim of (potential) sexual assault!

Sometimes you just freeze, you can't react quickly enough, your fear or confusion changes the way you would have reacted with a rational mind.

Weak for crying? After being assaulted? You're disgusting if you're either being serious with this post, or think it's something to troll about.
Reply 6
I was just wondering, I would not open a case for this as it was 10 years ago. I just felt disgusted with his gestures as he had a crush on me and wouldn't leave me alone.
Original post by Anonymous
It does seem like assault but given the circumstances it would be VERY difficult to do anything about it. As unfortunate as it may or may not seem, his intentions would be very hard to prove given how long ago it was. Make what you want of it I'm just giving my judgement based on what you have given.
Oh and chances are (if no sexual malice was intended) that he has probably forgotten about it by now.
Reply 7
I wouldn't open a case for this as it was a long time ago, I was just wondering.
Original post by Anonymous
In most circumstances, yes.

But given you were all kids and you were already playfighting, you'd struggle to come up with a case for that being sexual assault, especially given you were all fully clothed and it presumably didn't last more than seconds.

Well he had a crush on me, and he was a very flirty guy. He wasn't a small 15 year old, he was a bulky guy. I wasn't playing fighting with him or my brother, they just started to play fight out of nowhere while we were all watching a movie, and then he shoved my head onto his genitals until I hit him and he let go of me.
Original post by doodle_333
Hard to say... was there any sexual connotation to It? You were wrestling and stuff. It doesn't sound like he ever tried to do anything in bed with you. He may not have intended anything sexual with this. Just having a laugh with the kid sister of his friend. However if it's had an effect on you that's totally legitimate and you're allowed to feel that. Maybe talk to someone about it if it's upsetting you.
Maybe or maybe it's ordinary childhood shenanigans and you should try to forget it.
Original post by xoxAngel_Kxox
Why didn't you fight back?? Are you being serious?? That could possibly be the absolute worst thing you could ever, ever ask a victim of (potential) sexual assault!

Sometimes you just freeze, you can't react quickly enough, your fear or confusion changes the way you would have reacted with a rational mind.

Weak for crying? After being assaulted? You're disgusting if you're either being serious with this post, or think it's something to troll about.


First of all..

Fighting back would of helped the situation a bit more instead of just standing there like it's okay. at least defend yourself. I personally would NEVER allow or let anyone to treat me as such. People need to start sticking up for themselves and stop allowing people to mistreat them like s hit.

In those kind of scenarios, I can't imagine freezing still and allowing someone to take someone's childhood innocence right in front of their eyes and do absolute nothing.. hmm seems odd 🥴 no matter how 'old' or 'young' you are, do something it's better than doing nothing 🙃

Second of all...

Yes, weak for crying... shows that you're too vulnerable. 🤨

And third of all, I am being serious with this post otherwise I wouldn't of wrote my concerns/thoughts..

I'm sure this situation sounds about white anyway, so I'm about to continue with my business 😼
Original post by Anonymous
I did try to but I was much smaller at the time and he was a full grown teenager. I did hit him so he would let go of me. I was 12-13. I only told two close friends because I felt disgusted. I didn't tell my mother until we moved out because at the time I just didn't know how to tell her. My mother is a single mom and she worked a lot, and I would take care of my little brother. Our neighbor was best friends with him (more like a father figure to my little brother) and would come over every single day during summer break. I did not like this neighbor or his family, I always felt something was off with them, but my brother would invite him all the time. My mom and them were close because we come from the same country. That's why we were close. As for him crawling into my bed, keep in mind this was a grown guy. He was not a scrony 15 year old guy at all. He had a crush on me but I was not into him at all.


No wonder no one hardly believes these sexual assault stories bc people wait too damn long to ' confess it '.

Don't know why you would tell your friends first instead of your mother. Your mother could of prevented Future Incidents from happening & even stop communication with your neighbours.

But that's the past 🥴🥴 like you said your 23 now.. the situation happened like 10 years ago?? It's time to move on. You can't change the past.. only make the future better 🤣
Even if it was sexual in nature, which it easily could have been, it’s impossible to do anything about it now.

It can’t be proved it was sexual assault, and he could easily say it was just teenagers play fighting and you misconstrued it. The bed thing again is creepy but could have just been him messing about.

Best thing to do is forget about it and move on, which you seem to have done already.
Reply 12
I am impressed by the number of people telling you you should have fought back, I bet they're all males. is it really hard to understand she was 13 and probably thought wtf is he doing but didn't really know what to do in a situation like that (it lasted few seconds, she probably didn't even understand what happened)? They don't teach you that that **** can happen to you and what to do if it happens. But she says she "punched him" so does that not count as fighting back or has every one got comprehension problems?
now was it assault? uhm, somebody forced your head on his genitals (imitating a sexual act) i don't know what else you would call that. Crawling into your bad seems more of a joke to me, a bit inappropriate but not assault.
Sounds like a teenage boy messing around to me

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