depressed, ashamed Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 11 years ago
#1
hey, i know there's a lot of posts like this but i'm really feeling awful at the moment.

i went through a bad patch in the last couple of years or so, i really had no-self worth and was really self-destructive - drinking way too much, sleeping with random guys, plus i had an eating disorder. about a year ago i tried an E for the first time and loved it, mainly cos it kept me from feeling hungry. i only did it after that a few times, like 5 or 6 max. but one time because i wasn't eating and i was drinking a lot of alcohol i got really really wasted and was disgusting, i turned into the kind of person i usually despise. i was in a crowd of people on a night out and someone took a crowd photo, and i'm in it really noticeably, and you can SO tell that i'm completely out of it.

i'm completely through with all that **** now, i hate drugs and being around people who are on them makes me feel panicky and horrible - i hate the associations, the seediness, and i know so many oldish druggy people round here who just freak me out, because they are exactly what i'm trying to avoid turning into. i thought i've left that all behind, but then i saw the photo on facebook (worse, someone has it as their profile pic) and it made me feel so upset and ashamed. i feel like i can never escape from my bad decisions, no matter how much i try and make up for it. it reminded me of how unhappy i was and how much i want to keep this phase of my life from my family.

how can i feel better about this? it makes me feel so awful...i try and think 'no point in regretting' and that these experiences have made me stronger, but i DO regret it.
0
reply
Malsy
Badges: 16
Rep:
?
#2
Report 11 years ago
#2
I know what you mean by regretting and telling youself it makes you stronger but honestly it will do...try to move forward with your life, put that stuff behind you and move forwrad in a positive way, like maybe career wise ro getting a good job or speding time with friends to take your mind of this kind of stuff!

dont keep thinking about your mistakes everyda it will only get you down, firstly I think it would be best to express how mad you feel and hpw you wish you never did any bad stuff and how you so regret it, to someone who you know will listen and not say its ok, because I know that can be the worst when someone says its okay when you know its not, so like I said try to find someone who will listen so that yu can get it all off your chest and express how you so much regret it and then after that put a full stop to it, and meet with freinds that will then say its ok, because you know it wasnt but youve expressed how you feel about that and now you can finally say yes its okay and move on! you only live once(unless you believe in God) so learn by your mistakes and move forward, we all can and there is a way out, and theres always someothing better around the corner
0
reply
Keoje
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#3
Report 11 years ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
how can i feel better about this? it makes me feel so awful...i try and think 'no point in regretting' and that these experiences have made me stronger, but i DO regret it.
That feeling is something you'll have to bear for the rest of your life. Life is full of mistakes and you've learnt your lesson on this one; now look ahead of you and move on.
0
reply
death.drop
Badges: 14
Rep:
?
#4
Report 11 years ago
#4
reading that was like reading something i had written.
I don't think there's much you can do except remind yourself that it's in the past and you're a completely different person now. without those things happening you wouldn't be where you are now.
when something reminds you of it you're going to get a bit down about it, that's only natural. living with who you are NOW on a day to day basis is what's important.
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Have you made up your mind on your five uni choices?

Yes I know where I'm applying (129)
64.82%
No I haven't decided yet (41)
20.6%
Yes but I might change my mind (29)
14.57%

Watched Threads

View All