Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

My dad is such an elitist f****

I was telling my dad that this week I will go out with my mates to watch some movie when I was eating and my dad was sitting behind me in a sofa, my dad got curious about my friends and asked me what movies we like watching, I said stuff like Spider-man, Avengers, anything fictional basically.

My dad was then like "Ah so you are all dumb as I expected", and I am like "Excuse me?", he says that only dumb people like fictional stories and that we should be watching more..appropriate movies such as ones based on historical event. I am **** OFF, we are just 18, do you really think us lot enjoy that kind of stuff? He is like, well if they are intelligent people, aspiring doctors etc..then yes, they do but I know you are a dumb student so it makes sense you hang out with dumb friends.

After I heard that, I was so, so, SO ANGRY, I am not dumb, I am an average student that gets Bs and Cs at A level and my mates are average students like me, my dad himself only works as a mechanic, a pretty "low status" job if you ask me. Not only did my dad say such elitist shite he also laughed and mocked at me for it, that was my last straw and I threw a drink at that ugly laughing face of his.

And then after I threw the drink, he said sarcastically "All right, all right, they are all clever" and I faced him back with such an angry expression in my face he finally shut his mouth. My friends are nice people, they give me happiness and helped me a lot through difficult times and I find it absolutely disgusting he chats **** about them and mocks me for having them simply they don't have As and A*s and because they are not aspiring surgeons, doctors and all of that elitist ****.

I gave him a piece of my mind and told him I do not discriminate people based on their academic status, I will not and never will adapt such backwards elitist ideologies like you. I hate this whole concept of staying in your "own social circle" and mingling with people that have similar academic status to you only. I would rather have a nice person with Es at A level than some douchebag with A*s at A level as my friend any day. You yourself aren't clever and will get D maximum at A level, so I dunno what you were laughing about back there.

Just how do I deal with him the next time he brings up such shite talk like this? I really do not want to get triggered again that I have to seriously hurt him. And yes my dad is Asian.

PS - Sorry for making the post so long, but I thought the more details, the better

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

gjd800

Just laugh at his closed-mindedness

Reply 2

Burge91

well you hit the nail on the head about academia being an elitist institution. however, you must decide whether you are going to be a part of that or not. this sounds to me like he is fostering a desire in you to want to become an elite in something, which is reasonable...since elites change the world, usually for the better.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Burge91

Even if i were part of the 'elite' I would still mingle with people however I damn please, regardless of their social status or academic records

Reply 4

gjd800

You have a good attitude (well, maybe don't throw stuff at your dad), and it will see you through life well. Don't stress it

Reply 5

ageshallnot

Perhaps your dad's biggest failure has been raising a child who resorts to physical violence during a verbal argument.

Reply 6

bones-mccoy

I'm thinking the reason your dad is so judgemental is because of his own low-status job. If he were in a more prestigious role he wouldn't have such hang ups and resort to projecting his own insecurities onto his children.

Reply 7

avacados1

I’m still confused at how an ASIAN dad laughed a drink being chucked at him off

Reply 8

the bear

tell ur dad to decoke his manifold

Reply 9

ageshallnot

Original post by avacados1

I’m still confused at how an ASIAN dad laughed a drink being chucked at him off

It makes one think, doesn't it???

Reply 10

username4762440

We don't always agree with what our parents believe/think. As someone said earlier, you have a good head on your shoulders. Keep it on, don't lose it with your dad.on

(edited 4 years ago)

Reply 11

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

And yes my dad is Asian.

I feel you, idk why but it seems most Asian fathers are complete ****.

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

Original post by avacados1

I’m still confused at how an ASIAN dad laughed a drink being chucked at him off

LOL same. i'd be dead.

Reply 13

Moments

He wanted to wind you up and he pushed those buttons oh so perfectly. Of course he’s laughing his head off.

You lost the game.

Reply 14

OddOnes

You are right, being a kind, good person is more important than grades.

Reply 15

username3895014

Original post by avacados1

I’m still confused at how an ASIAN dad laughed a drink being chucked at him off

I’d be dashed out of the window

Reply 16

Anonymous #3

Original post by Anonymous

I really do not want to get triggered again that I have to seriously hurt him.

Can you see how that sentence is problematic? You should never, especially with your own father, resort to violence in response to some questionable comments. Yes, your dad was talking nonsense, but did you really need to throw a drink at him? If in anger don't act in the spur of the moment, you could make things so much worse.

Beside that, the rest of what you said in response to your dad was spot on. Hopefully he gets the message, but if he does mention it again either ignore him or just counter him as you've just proved you can do. Do not use violence.

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

Original post by ageshallnot

Perhaps your dad's biggest failure has been raising a child who resorts to physical violence during a verbal argument.

He just kept on laughing even tho my face expression was quite clear it wasn't funny, and along the way just kept on repeating those same elitist insults, I simply couldn't hold in my temper. I am pretty sure you would have had the same strong urge to do the same if it was your dad behaving like this