Can I re attract her? Watch

Anonymous #1
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I've been speaking to a girl for a few weeks and the other day we went on our first date. It started off great, she complimented me loads calling me hot, I managed to make her laugh, we had a lot in common. We ended up making out, and it was going great. However I after that, my nerves got the best of me, and I became more quiet and she did most of the conversation. I knew I ****ed up at this point, and it was obvious she enjoying the date less. The next day she said she didn't feel a 'spark' on the date, and she doesn't seem interested in going on a second

I responded in a calm way, acting like it was no big deal and that I was fine with it. But tbh I am really not. I haven't messaged since, as I do not want to come off as desperate. What is the best way of re attracting a girl? Considering that she was originally attracted to both my looks and personality, I feel that not all hope is lost. I just don't want to mess it up further.
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captainamerica77
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No... she isnt a magnet...

"re attract her" he says pfftttt
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Surnia
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Option 1: Ask her out again, and be honest and tell her you like her, but you got a bit tongue-tied because were nervous about getting the date right with her. However, be prepared to be rejected as she didn't 'feel a spark' and you acted coolly towards her when she said she this!

Option 2: Forget this girl and work on your social skills. Learn to be more comfortable chatting to girls as friends. Don't rush into making out on a first date.
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ZenaAdams
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If she’s not interested, that means she’s not Interested, you can’t “re attract” her, it’s understandable that your hurt or not happy but bare in mind that she doesn’t wanna go on a second date, if she doesn’t then leave her be..find someone else and I’ll tell you something else, don’t make out in a first date, don’t kiss or anything like that with a girl u go with on a FIRST date, show respect that you really are interested and making out is not the way to show ur attracted to her
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Anonymous #2
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She didn’t find a spark, and she was honest about it, this is why so many girls call guys creeps what the hell is “re attract”. You tried it out with her, she’s not as interested as you thoughts Just move on, good luck
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Surnia)
Option 1: Ask her out again, and be honest and tell her you like her, but you got a bit tongue-tied because were nervous about getting the date right with her. However, be prepared to be rejected as she didn't 'feel a spark' and you acted coolly towards her when she said she this!

Option 2: Forget this girl and work on your social skills. Learn to be more comfortable chatting to girls as friends. Don't rush into making out on a first date.
If I was going to ask her out again, should I leave it for a while first?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ZenaAdams)
If she’s not interested, that means she’s not Interested, you can’t “re attract” her, it’s understandable that your hurt or not happy but bare in mind that she doesn’t wanna go on a second date, if she doesn’t then leave her be..find someone else and I’ll tell you something else, don’t make out in a first date, don’t kiss or anything like that with a girl u go with on a FIRST date, show respect that you really are interested and making out is not the way to show ur attracted to her
Yeah but it was the moment when we both wanted to kiss. If I backed away when she leaned in that probably would've gone down worse.
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ZenaAdams
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah but it was the moment when we both wanted to kiss. If I backed away when she leaned in that probably would've gone down worse.
Yeah fair enough, but are u sure u both wanted to kiss or did lean for a kiss first? Because maybe that’s why she wasn’t interested anymore cause sometimes little things either attract girls more to you or they don’t
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by ZenaAdams)
Yeah fair enough, but are u sure u both wanted to kiss or did lean for a kiss first? Because maybe that’s why she wasn’t interested anymore cause sometimes little things either attract girls more to you or they don’t
Well we were cuddling together and talking. She was resting her head on my shoulder and then she turned towards me and leaned in. So I am assuming she wanted to kiss, and it went on for a while.
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Alexty28
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Leave it for some time. She might be trying to figure things out and you don't want to come off as needy. It is possible that an attraction can reignite, especially if there was one before. However do not put all your eggs in one basket and just focus on her, there is still the chance that it won't happen ofc.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Alexty28)
Leave it for some time. She might be trying to figure things out and you don't want to come off as needy. It is possible that an attraction can reignite, especially if there was one before. However do not put all your eggs in one basket and just focus on her, there is still the chance that it won't happen ofc.
I want to, but I'm not sure how I should interact with her atm. It might sound a bit cringe, but when you have dated loads of girls and your not interested in them and then you find that one girl with everything you want, it is just so hard to simply give up and move on.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She didn’t find a spark, and she was honest about it, this is why so many girls call guys creeps what the hell is “re attract”. You tried it out with her, she’s not as interested as you thoughts Just move on, good luck
Yeah I know I worded it badly, but it really has got me down.
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JakePauler4life
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It is easy for us guys to get weak when we find someone we really like, because we do not want to **** it up, but girls aren't normally attracted to weak needy guys.

I say never lose hope, but focus on life aswell, and enjoy it. I know some people who would never consider going out originally and end up together. So never say never. But just don't get too upset if it doesn't work out between you two.

She might be just testing the waters. Maybe she speaking to someone else, and seeing how it goes with them. And maybe she was judging your reaction to her. So it's good you played it cool.

It honestly is a horrible feeling, I've been there mate. Most people have. But you just got to wait and see how it plays out. Just do not come off as desperate and obsessed. It will turn her off you even more. Be friendly and get to know her in a friendly way. Maybe with some light flirting and compliments Inbetween, so you don't get friendzoned. And do not message everyday and respond too quickly either.

Hope it works out for you
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by JakePauler4life)
It is easy for us guys to get weak when we find someone we really like, because we do not want to **** it up, but girls aren't normally attracted to weak needy guys.

I say never lose hope, but focus on life aswell, and enjoy it. I know some people who would never consider going out originally and end up together. So never say never. But just don't get too upset if it doesn't work out between you two.

She might be just testing the waters. Maybe she speaking to someone else, and seeing how it goes with them. And maybe she was judging your reaction to her. So it's good you played it cool.

It honestly is a horrible feeling, I've been there mate. Most people have. But you just got to wait and see how it plays out. Just do not come off as desperate and obsessed. It will turn her off you even more. Be friendly and get to know her in a friendly way. Maybe with some light flirting and compliments Inbetween, so you don't get friendzoned. And do not message everyday and respond too quickly either.

Hope it works out for you
Thanks. Yeah I haven't spoken to her since we had that discussion, I'm just gonna see how it plays out and be friendly with her.
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Arisapo
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Honestly, best advice I can give you is take this as a learning curve and work on your social skills/confidence.

If you message her again and try and convince her to change your mind, you’re going to become and seem less attractive.

If it seems like you’re not that bothered, working on yourself or who knows, even getting more dates and her thinking she’s just an option, she is more likely to become attracted to you.

It’s no guarantee, but people are more inclined to want something they can’t have than be overly desperate.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Arisapo)
Honestly, best advice I can give you is take this as a learning curve and work on your social skills/confidence.

If you message her again and try and convince her to change your mind, you’re going to become and seem less attractive.

If it seems like you’re not that bothered, working on yourself or who knows, even getting more dates and her thinking she’s just an option, she is more likely to become attracted to you.

It’s no guarantee, but people are more inclined to want something they can’t have than be overly desperate.
Yeah thats the plan of action I am probably going to take. I have not messaged her in a while now and I'm going to leave it for a bit. Just pretty hung up over her atm
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sinfonietta
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She's decided she's not interested so leave her alone. Her mind is already made up.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by sinfonietta)
She's decided she's not interested so leave her alone. Her mind is already made up.
Your probably right. Just strange that it was going great and it ended like that.
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Retired_Messiah
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'Re-attracting' has a very low success rate. Your only real way of trying to ask her out again would to admit that you got nervous and that made you act awkward, but unless she finds that 'cute' (unlikely) it's probably not going to help you.

Generally if they've decided that they're not interested, you can't force them to be 're-interested', so to speak.
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Bang Outta Order
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Your probably right. Just strange that it was going great and it ended like that.
It's not strange. Just move on. Big deal, you laughed and kissed. She can laugh and kiss anyone. Women are doing this thing called dumping more and more, sometimes preemptively to beat you to the punch, to the point of masochism and spitefully hurting themselves. Don't sleep on it.
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