How long you should know someone for untill you get married

this is a very weird question i know ... but i was talking to a mate and we were talking about how long you would have to being going out with your partner before you decided to get married.

my mate said one year...if you know them for one year and your happy and together and right age to get married then they should ... becuase if you dont get married and just date for over a few years you loose some connection...

however i think you should know the other person for way longer like 4years - i dont know why i think that i just do ... i mean im not going to marry someone after one year of knowing them.
i know people that known people for 7 years before they have gotton married ..

what do you think? on average how long would you have to know the other person for ? x

Reply 1

PaperMoon

I don't think there is a set time, with some people it just feels completely right after a few months.

Personally though I would definitely wait beyond the honeymoon period before making a big decision. You're more likely to know what the relationship experience will be in the long term after 3-4 years together than after just 1 year.

Reply 2

Polkadotsox

I suppose it depends on your personality/relationship. For example, I know people who've got engaged after a couple of months at 17 years old, whereas I can't imagine doing that. I've been with my boyfriend like, 4 and a half years, and yeah, if he asked I'd say yes, but there's no way I would've done a year or so ago. However, my mum's friends got married after only knowing eachother six weeks, and they stayed together happily for like, 30 years or something until the wife unfortunately died. So I don't think it's always a case of the less time, the weaker the relationship/connection or the shorter the marriage. Though my mum's friends' situation may be rather rare, I don't know!

So yeah, depends on relationship/personality really.

xx

Reply 3

inksplodge

17

It all depends I spose... Someone I know got married to their partner because he was going away, something to with the army I guess. They'd been together maybe a year or so... But on the other hand, my bf's parents got married after 6 years of being together. I think it really depends. I personally wouldn't want to marry someone if I'd been with them less than a couple of years because you're (presumably) going to spend the rest of your life with them. :p:

Reply 4

BlackHawk

17

I knew my other half for 6 weeks before he proposed. :smile:

'You just know' is a very true cliche. We're very happily married 3 1/2 years on from that day.

Reply 5

DoMakeSayThink

15

At my current age, I wouldn't get married. Mid twenties, I think I would probably be happy to propose after a couple of years, but obviously it depends on the relationship. I don't think I'd ever get married after less than a year, but heck, maybe my views will change.

Reply 6

Raddoun

anywhere from a day to 20 years should be sufficient :smile:

Reply 7

Aranyani

1

it completely depends.. i know someone who was with their partner for 9 years and then they broke up! But then there are people who get hitched after 6 weeks and last forever..

Reply 8

candy x

1

it all just depends how your relationship is.

for example

in the past i was with someone for 3 years and nothing like marriage or moving in together ever seemed right

on the other hand iv been with someone for nearly 10 months now and we moved in together after only 6 months and if felt completly right (i would never have expected that i would be ready for that after such a short period of time)!!!!

i think it all just depends on how you feel, for me, i think whoever said "wait for the honeymoon period to be over" is definatly right..... also, if possible, live with each other for a while first as it does honestly change the whole dynamics of a relationship.

you got to remember theres no rush..... spend time enjoying each other...... then spend time enjoying moving in together...... and then spend time enjoying marriage before thinking about children etc.

if you rush everything, ull have nothing to look forward to.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

ive been with my bf 5 months now n we are going to move in together in january n he says he would propose to me now if it wouldnt be for othr peoples reactions,
i would say , you only know when you are the one in he relationhip.

Reply 10

cuddles x

OP

1

so theres no really set time ... it all depends.

Reply 11

candy x

1

cuddles x

so theres no really set time ... it all depends.

correct!

Reply 12

22KT22

15

^ yep. depends on the relationship and the people involved!

Reply 13

cuddles x

OP

1

so it could be one year or even 7 years.

Reply 14

scaryhair

12

There's no set time, but personally I would like to have been with someone for at least 5 years before I got engaged to them. I'd really want to know them inside out, you know?

EDIT: That is unless, I'm getting past my "sell by date" and my future looks like a life doomed to spinsterism, then that time would be reduced to about a year or two :wink:

Providing I met the right guy of course!

Reply 15

cuddles x

OP

1

thats exactly what i was trying to say to my mate !! ^

Reply 16

curryADD

12

cuddles x

this is a very weird question i know ... but i was talking to a mate and we were talking about how long you would have to being going out with your partner before you decided to get married.

my mate said one year...if you know them for one year and your happy and together and right age to get married then they should ... becuase if you dont get married and just date for over a few years you loose some connection...

however i think you should know the other person for way longer like 4years - i dont know why i think that i just do ... i mean im not going to marry someone after one year of knowing them.
i know people that known people for 7 years before they have gotton married ..

what do you think? on average how long would you have to know the other person for ? x

it utterly depends on your personality. i'm nineteen, married as of two weeks, and i dated my "boyfriend" for just under a year. however, i'm incredibly impulsive, and committed to the things i impulsively decide. in that way, i'm a bit of a "shoot first, questions later," person...furthermore, my husband helped to get me through my best friend's death, my grandpa's, and a period of depression after i was raped. because of all of this turmoil, i know i can count on him, and he knows he can count on me.

*shrug*

i have a friend whose parents knew each other for 3 weeks before they were married. they've been happy together for 30 years and counting. it's rare, but it happens....and age and time known shouldn't cause you too many problems if the person is truly your love of a lifetime.

Reply 17

Mighty Grandiose Noble Knight

1

A good couple of years. It depends on culture too :biggrin:

Reply 18

candy x

1

scaryhair

There's no set time, but personally I would like to have been with someone for at least 5 years before I got engaged to them. I'd really want to know them inside out, you know?

EDIT: That is unless, I'm getting past my "sell by date" and my future looks like a life doomed to spinsterism, then that time would be reduced to about a year or two :wink:

Providing I met the right guy of course!

see thats what i always thought....but love does silly things to your senses!!!!!!