Just got a girlfriend after ages, worried about sex Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 11 years ago
#1
I am a nervous person and even with my ex I had erection problems, had a few one night stands with the same problem.

I keep wanting to ask my doctor for viagra as one of my main problems with meeting women is im afraid of performance.

Its been 4 years since I last had a girlfriend and only had sex about 8 times in 4 years though in part that was due to other depression over a murder in family which was over news and someone in my family was wrongfully accused and there was a lot of gossip around and nasty things said on nights out.

So im out of the loop but just met a girl who came out of a 3 year relationship and really likes me, Its only been 3 days since we met but we speak on msn or by text a lot(was on MSN for 4 hours before I had to leave uni library as my hall cant use it) then spoke via email for about 5 hours then text for the last 2 hours

I know about her life from a kid to now so it seems hopeful but she hinted at sex soon which worries me.

I want something like Viagra but afraid to ask doctor or be told no as its down to stress so to just relax etc.
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Amelorn
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#2
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#2
Stop worrying. ED can be as much psychological as it can be physical.
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Anonymous #1
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Yes its mainly performance anxiety as the only times I have ever been on form is say after a night out drinking with friends and im buzzing and in a really happy mood or when I called my ex about 3 weeks after breaking up just for sex and it was one of best nights of my life and it came easy.
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Anonymous #2
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if you were ever on anti-depressants, that can cause lack of sex drive and performance problems, when i was on them my libido tanked!

sorry what ive said is assuming.
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Anonymous #1
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I do have depression issues ironically most related to being alone and shy and nervous

Havent been on AD's for 7 years,

I have a sex drive just nerves.
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Easy E
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Maybe get a little Dutch courage?
I don't mean get legless, but alcohol often helps to alleviate inhibition, anxiety etc.

Can you masturbate properly?
If so, then there exists no physical problem.
You just have to be more confident generally.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Gan)
Maybe get a little Dutch courage?
I don't mean get legless, but alcohol often helps to alleviate inhibition, anxiety etc.

Can you masturbate properly?
If so, then there exists no physical problem.
You just have to be more confident generally.
Nope as cant perked up I get aroused though and the liquid flows just cant grow
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Easy E
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Nope as cant perked up I get aroused though and the liquid flows just cant grow
Sorry, I didn't understand you

Do you mean liquid flows in your phallus correctly but it does not become erect, even when masturbating?

Well there's only a limited amount of help you can get for that on H&R!
See your doctor, and NOT just for Viagra!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Gan)
Sorry, I didn't understand you

Do you mean liquid flows in your phallus correctly but it does not become erect, even when masturbating?

Well there's only a limited amount of help you can get for that on H&R!
See your doctor, and NOT just for Viagra!
I feel horny and I get a sticky liquid flowing but dont perk up.
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bekahchu
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If you can't even masturbate properly then I don't think the issue is being nervous with women. See a doc.
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mollymustard
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I think you should go and see a doctor.
At the end of the day, lots of men are worried about erection problems, and I'm sure they will be able to give you some good advice.

It does sound like it could be performance anxiety, but if you have problems masturbating when you arnt anxious then it could also be something totally different.

Go and get yourself checked out, it might turn out that Viagra is a viable option but I'm sure your GP will know if this will be suitable.
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Anonymous #3
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Well im anxious when masturbating too as I find it dirty and plus I feel im only doing it as I cant get any.

Since I met he girl I havent masturbated once wheras before I might have done it a few times a day, or once a day etc

As I like this girl I dont feel the need to.
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bekahchu
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If you find it dirty... don't do it. Masturbation is no more dirty than sex.
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Anonymous #1
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Whoops user 3 was me, my fault my flatmate was logged in on their account and I didnt check.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by bekahchu)
If you find it dirty... don't do it. Masturbation is no more dirty than sex.
I like it when others do it to me but dont like touching myself as its just me touching myself.

Its partly as when it comes to sex I love to use my hands to touch and feel my partner and be passionate.
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bekahchu
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I like it when others do it to me but dont like touching myself as its just me touching myself.

Its partly as when it comes to sex I love to use my hands to touch and feel my partner and be passionate.
Fair enough, I just don't get your logic.

Anyway, like I said go and see a doctor, they're the experts.
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Yasmin2K8
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(Original post by bekahchu)
Fair enough, I just don't get your logic.

Anyway, like I said go and see a doctor, they're the experts.
Hun i think your more of an expert on sexual issues looking at your post history lol
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Anonymous #1
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Thats what I was thinking but they arent that friendly in my surgery theres only one nice one and its a woman! but she only seems to be in once a week.

Had a doctor moan at me last week as I asked for a copy of a letter I had for uni when I handed in my essay late and lost the original and he moaned and went "I dont believe you, you cant just lose a letter" and refused to give me a copy(all he needed to do was go into the pc which was on and print it out and sign it)
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bekahchu
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(Original post by Yasmin2K8)
Hun i think your more of an expert on sexual issues looking at your post history lol
I don't have a penis so I can't really help with this one.
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bekahchu
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thats what I was thinking but they arent that friendly in my surgery theres only one nice one and its a woman! but she only seems to be in once a week.

Had a doctor moan at me last week as I asked for a copy of a letter I had for uni when I handed in my essay late and lost the original and he moaned and went "I dont believe you, you cant just lose a letter" and refused to give me a copy(all he needed to do was go into the pc which was on and print it out and sign it)
So get a new doctor! Stop making excuses - at the end of the day if you want help, go to the doctor, if not then stop posting on here! We can't directly help you we can only make suggestions.
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