Turn on thread page Beta
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    hi this is my ps . if you want to go through it and can take out little mistakes , be my guest plzzz
    thx



    I have chosen to study either biochemistry or pharmacy at university level because I have enjoyed studying Chemistry at A-level and I am keen to proceed to a more advanced level. I think following either of those majors in university is the most suitable option for me. I am very interested in Pharmacy because I enjoy the reasoning that lies behind the variety of topics that will cover medicinal science. I would like to specialize in micro-organisms. My interest in biomedical science comes from its challenging and fascinating nature (for instance in the diagnosis of human diseases).
    Since coming here in England in 2002, I have become quite proficient in the use of English language. Even though I have had sufficient exposure by English courses followed in the Netherlands, my communicative skills have improved significantly as well in written as verbal sense through my stay in the UK.
    I have successively completed the HAVO in the Netherlands, equivalent to GCSC in the UK. From the end of 2002, I've been following an A-level course Chemistry/Math/Physics which I hope will be completed in a short term. This year, I have decided that I will re-sit some of the modules I have taken in AS Chemistry and Maths to make my qualification even higher.
    I never had the chance to undergo any training regarding medical practice, I do believe that I would be able to cope with whatever challenges I will meet while pursuing the career I've chosen to obtain. The sports I enjoy the most are football, basketball and badminton. I enjoy computing as a hobby because it helps me to broaden the knowledge of the subjects that I am taking. In other spare time I enjoy reading books about science and listening to music.
    I consider myself to be an outgoing person and enjoy an active life. I find pleasure in solving a problem, or understanding a new concept, and I believe this is why I find science so interesting. At present, I am putting a huge amount of effort in achieving the best grades in A-level which will eventually allow me to reach the next target in my education. I enjoy the challenge which will be provided by university and I am confident that it will give me the best chance to achieve my potential.

    lol gcsc
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HaggenDaZ)
    lol gcsc
    lol
    thx for noticing

    (Original post by fonz)
    lol
    thx for noticing
    no prob

    avoid brackets

    Have you tried the personal statement subforum? I doubt you'll get much of a response on here.

    " since coming here in england " phrase more effectively

    " to make my qualification higher " again, re phrase it
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HaggenDaZ)
    " since coming here in england " phrase more effectively


    like how????

    " I have successively completed the HAVO " awkward expression, makes little sense

    should be " i have successfully "

    u want me to write ur personal statement for u??? i dunno enhance the vocabulary.......... "since arriving in england " makes more sense than " since coming here in england "

    " I never had the chance to undergo any training regarding medical practice "

    do not put that - it is negative.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Hmm you need more work/time on this.

    You need to provide examples of doing activities which have improved your key skills eg communication, teamwork (could use your sports) which are very important for pharmacy.

    You need to elaborate on more points, and mention any decent achievements.

    you have used I too much, if u r applying to oxbridge, dey will rip it up

    your personal statement does however get teh main points across but needs more work
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HaggenDaZ)
    " I never had the chance to undergo any training regarding medical practice "

    do not put that - it is negative.

    yes but i have to be honest and show that the interest and challenges for medical training is there
    so thats positive
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HaggenDaZ)
    you have used I too much, if u r applying to oxbridge, dey will rip it up

    your personal statement does however get teh main points across but needs more work
    thx god i aint lol
    i am applying for pharmacy in demontford uni

    (Original post by fonz)
    yes but i have to be honest and show that the interest and challenges for medical training is there
    so thats positive
    doesnt matter.................. it is still negative
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by HaggenDaZ)
    doesnt matter.................. it is still negative

    come on man its a a personal statement
    what els should i start with ?????
    its all about me , isnt it???????
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by hihihihi)
    Hmm you need more work/time on this.

    You need to provide examples of doing activities which have improved your key skills eg communication, teamwork (could use your sports) which are very important for pharmacy.

    You need to elaborate on more points, and mention any decent achievements.
    as i came from holland 2 years back i didnt had to do key skills.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by fonz)
    come on man its a a personal statement
    what els should i start with ?????
    its all about me , isnt it???????
    It's good advice. Take it or be faced with a PS that makes you look like you're feeling sorry for yourself.
 
 
 

University open days

  • Staffordshire University
    Everything except: Midwifery, Operating Department Practice, Paramedic Undergraduate
    Sun, 21 Oct '18
  • University of Exeter
    Undergraduate Open Days - Exeter Campus Undergraduate
    Wed, 24 Oct '18
  • University of Bradford
    Faculty of Health Studies Postgraduate
    Wed, 24 Oct '18
Poll
Who is most responsible for your success at university
Applying to uni

All the essentials

The adventure begins mug

Student life: what to expect

What it's really like going to uni

Graduates celebrate

How to write a good personal statement

Expert PS advice from the people who will read it

Uni match

Uni match

Can't decide where to apply? Our tool will help you find the perfect course

Two students working together

A-Z of universities

Read our guides to unis and colleges from around the UK

A student working on a computer

Personal statement help

Use our tool to get your ideal PS quickly!

Hands typing

Degrees without fees

Discover more about degree-level apprenticeships.

A student looking down a microscope

Planning open days

Find upcoming open days and get advice on preparing.

Help out other students

These questions still need an answer

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.