Mature student just moved to Paisley, in a 'blue funk', advice or contacts please? Watch
So I'm 46, just about to turn 47 in a few days. I just moved to Paisley to attend UWS, going directly into 2nd year of a computing science BSc. I did the HNC at Borders college last year, quite enjoyed it and got an ‘A’ grade, which was actually required to get into the aforementioned degree. There were only 4 Scottish unis. that would allow me to go straight into 2nd year, and since I’m getting on in years now, I really needed to do it that way, rather than having to start a degree from scratch.
For the last 12 years I’ve been running an e-commerce business from home, but it hasn’t really taken off that much and only pays poorly, less than minimum wage TBQH. Before that I had an unsuccessful attempt at a career in care work, then did an access course, then a sociology degree at Edinburgh uni., only gaining a 2:2, which knocked my confidence a lot, then after that did a PGCE, but that again led nowhere. I’ve applied for more jobs and been to more interviews than I can count, so eking out an existence through self-employment in e-commerce has basically been the ‘least worst’ of the various things I’ve tried. Even if the pay sucks it’s better than nothing, and at least has given me something to get up in the morning for.
Over time however I’ve come to the conclusion that this situation can’t continue forever, so eventually chanced across an entry-level IT course to do, and then went on to the HNC. I figure whatever happens with my business in future, it’s good to have a ‘plan B’.
Of the unis. that I applied to I got rejections from two, since I don’t have any maths since high school. So that left UWS or Robert Gordon. I was really not keen on moving to Aberdeen due to the higher cost of living and being so far from friends & family. So that really narrowed it down to UWS Paisley or UWS Lanarkshire. Paisley seemed the sensible choice for social, transport and living cost reasons, so here I am.
My state of mind was not good before moving, and moving itself has really been an absolute nightmare. It has been very expensive, and physically and mentally exhausting. I actually lost about 1.5KG in the space of a few weeks, and I’m not a big guy to begin with. It took 3 van loads and one car load to move all my stuff including my entire business stock, and I’m having to abandon my allotment which has taken me years to get in decent shape (I might be getting another one here, though). My new (rented flat) was really in a poor state and had all sorts of problems that I wasn’t aware of when I viewed it. I have had to do a huge amount of cleaning and trying to organise things here to get my life back on track. I even walked into a situation where bailiffs were threatening to come through the door for the previous tenant’s unpaid bills and had to sort all that out. The floors and ceilings in this flat are paper thin as well which means I am constantly disturbed by my neighbours even just talking or walking across the floor.
So obviously I am not a happy chappy. I’m more isolated than ever, my social life is non-existent, I’m essentially having a mid-life crisis with all the worries about never having had a full-time job outside my business, really needing a place of my own at this stage (I am literally too old to take out a 25- or even 20-year mortgage at my age), and badly missing the clubscene, music and festivals which I used to enjoy when I was young.
So that is my tale of woe. I was wondering if anyone has any good advice, and at least could point me in the right direction just to get out for a drink and maybe check out this Club 69 place which seems like it would be good and definitely my kind of music. I thought about going by myself but I really hate going to clubs and festivals by myself, I just feel like such a ‘Johnny-no-mates’. I did look on meetup.com and joined one group, but they’ve not had anything on yet that I fancy except some pub crawl that was far too early in the day for me (who TF starts a pub crawl at 12 noon??) My classmates have some FB chat group that they kindly added me to, but I’m not convinced that it will lead to any social events. Also I could really do with getting some p/t work so maybe if that could lead to any social life that would be nice.
Anyway, sorry for the long post. Any advice would be appreciated. TIA