How to stop being jealous constantly Watch

HelloGoodbye
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#1
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I never used to be a jealous person until last year and I don’t know how to stop. I keep seeing other people get everything in life (graduate jobs, relationships, holidays) and I don’t have any of those.

There’s one girl who I’m sooo jealous of, she went to a private school, her parents are loaded, she’s incredibly pretty and gets guys so easily and I hate that I don’t have that life. I’m particularly jealous of couples since I’ve never been in a relationship and I really want one. I’ve gotten to the point where I go home and cry when someone tells me about their relationship lol. And I’ve found it impossible to get a graduate job so I feel sh*t when people I went to uni with are doing great and I’m still on my minimum wage job.

I know envy is toxic but I can’t stop. Someone please help??
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cam777
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It's easy to get focussed on what other people have and what they are doing which makes your life seem insignificant but it's not necessarily as good as it seems. You'll constantly see stories in the media about celebrities who are cheating on their partners (why would they when they are with somebody so hot!!), are in rehab for drug use due to the pressure of celebrity or rich executives who kill themselves due to depression for example. You can waste a lot of time looking at things you wish you had but it's really important to accept what you have and embrace it. I don't mean that you have to settle with that forever, ambition is a great thing but at the moment you're single and in a minimum wage job. Some people have progressed faster than you have but it's not a race or a competition, your life is going to go different to everybody else's. Look at the positives. You're single to you have the opportunity to go out and date somebody, your friends don't have that. You probably have more time outside of work as you're not taking your work home with you. Make use of that time to work on your CV, learn interview techniques, take up a new hobby that will help you meet people and increase your prospects. There will be a time when you are in a well-paid job and hating all of the stress that goes with it and wish you could do something else with less stress. You'll envy the people working in Burger King, wishing all you had to worry about was flipping a burger and asking if they want fries with that.
Take a look at the US presidents, Roosevelt was 42 when he took office, Trump was 70. They both got to their goal but had a different path and different experiences along the way so look for the positives in what you have any ignore the outside appearance of all these supposedly happy and successful people.
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HelloGoodbye
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(Original post by cam777)
It's easy to get focussed on what other people have and what they are doing which makes your life seem insignificant but it's not necessarily as good as it seems. You'll constantly see stories in the media about celebrities who are cheating on their partners (why would they when they are with somebody so hot!!), are in rehab for drug use due to the pressure of celebrity or rich executives who kill themselves due to depression for example. You can waste a lot of time looking at things you wish you had but it's really important to accept what you have and embrace it. I don't mean that you have to settle with that forever, ambition is a great thing but at the moment you're single and in a minimum wage job. Some people have progressed faster than you have but it's not a race or a competition, your life is going to go different to everybody else's. Look at the positives. You're single to you have the opportunity to go out and date somebody, your friends don't have that. You probably have more time outside of work as you're not taking your work home with you. Make use of that time to work on your CV, learn interview techniques, take up a new hobby that will help you meet people and increase your prospects. There will be a time when you are in a well-paid job and hating all of the stress that goes with it and wish you could do something else with less stress. You'll envy the people working in Burger King, wishing all you had to worry about was flipping a burger and asking if they want fries with that.
Take a look at the US presidents, Roosevelt was 42 when he took office, Trump was 70. They both got to their goal but had a different path and different experiences along the way so look for the positives in what you have any ignore the outside appearance of all these supposedly happy and successful people.
But no one wants to date me, that’s the problem. I’ve never been asked out in real life and dating apps have been a fail. And I’m stressed cos I’m not making any money at my sh*t job. I get so frustrated with life cos everyone I know is getting their career/family life started and im nowhere near.
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HelloGoodbye
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marinade
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The envy is a symptom of anxiety/depression/low mood. You'll still get those feelings, but if you can make the anxiety/depression/low mood a bit lower and manageable there'll be a breathing space where there isn't such a savage bite to the envy.

Do you have something to look forward to?
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HelloGoodbye
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(Original post by marinade)
The envy is a symptom of anxiety/depression/low mood. You'll still get those feelings, but if you can make the anxiety/depression/low mood a bit lower and manageable there'll be a breathing space where there isn't such a savage bite to the envy.

Do you have something to look forward to?
I think you’re right but even before I became depressed and anxious I was always jealous of pretty girls. I’m gonna be starting my masters soon so I’m looking forward to that.
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