swanseajack1
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#41
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(Original post by CCauston113)
I'm glad it helped; I thought that as someone who's just finished A levels I might be able to offer a fresh perspective. I would start by seeing if she would like to change sixth form so she can repeat year 12 with different subjects, since that seems to be the root of the problem. It's not uncommon, and as long as she puts in the effort with her new options it could be worth it. It means she'll start uni a year older(if she wants to) but she'll still be the same age as people who did a gap year; just maybe suggest she doesn't do both. I have a friend who repeated year 12, is doing a gap year and is going to a Scottish university, where they start a year younger, meaning he'll be the same age as the Scottish students that are in their final year when he starts
years ago my son was getting heavily bullied and was missing school and his performance started deteriorating. The moment we told him he was moving school his behaviour got better. Reading this thread it is clear that OPs daughter is extremely unhappy in the school and doesnt feel either the school or her parents are helping. Moving to a new environment appears the answer and the most likely effect of that is OP will need to resit year 12. Perhaps the mother can suggest something like Sociology but ultimately the daughter needs to choose her own subject. The less restrictive nature of a sixth form college and the wider range of subjects offered might be better suited to the daughter.
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username4530544
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#42
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#42
Thanks guys for the support. It's truly appreciated.

At her school, you have to do 3 A levels, you can't drop one. I've already asked.

My daughter adores her chemistry teacher, as well as her psychology one.

My husband is going to ask if she can have enforced study leave for biology.

I really don't hold out much hope though.

There is no chance of restarting new A levels, I've asked - it's all to do with funding.

There aren't any local colleges that do A levels here.
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idontkn
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#43
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(Original post by boble1)
Thanks guys for the support. It's truly appreciated.

At her school, you have to do 3 A levels, you can't drop one. I've already asked.

My daughter adores her chemistry teacher, as well as her psychology one.

My husband is going to ask if she can have enforced study leave for biology.

I really don't hold out much hope though.

There is no chance of restarting new A levels, I've asked - it's all to do with funding.

There aren't any local colleges that do A levels here.
What about tower hamlets college? It has really improved and they are supportive as they created different buildings for A level students and btec students. They also take on anyone whether their behaviour is good or bad, and anyone who didn’t do well at GCSE. I know this doesn’t apply to your daughter. I also know because my brother was forced to go on study leave and got expelled and was only allowed in for his exams and only passed one gcse and was allowed to do btec entry level at tower hamlets.
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squeakysquirrel
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#44
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, thank you. This is the best advice ever.

Her behaviour started with the A levels. It's the biology making her this way.

I really want her to talk to a counselor but I know she will just clam up. I am quite happy to get a private tutor for her.

The school will be ringing my husband this morning.
Many years now but I was a terrible A level student. EEE.

I left school and of course my parents made me get a job. A year in Asda made me realise my mistake.

With your daughter I would tackle her one A level at a time. YouTube is your friend. Get a private tutor as well. Don't bargain with her. If she won't work then tell her she has to get a job. I ran outofbrain power for A levels despite doing well at gcse.
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swanseajack1
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#45
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(Original post by boble1)
Thanks guys for the support. It's truly appreciated.

At her school, you have to do 3 A levels, you can't drop one. I've already asked.

My daughter adores her chemistry teacher, as well as her psychology one.

My husband is going to ask if she can have enforced study leave for biology.

I really don't hold out much hope though.

There is no chance of restarting new A levels, I've asked - it's all to do with funding.

There aren't any local colleges that do A levels here.
There must be a local college even if she has to travel. DM me where you live and I will try to help you.
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username4530544
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#46
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(Original post by idontkn)
What about tower hamlets college? It has really improved and they are supportive as they created different buildings for A level students and btec students. They also take on anyone whether their behaviour is good or bad, and anyone who didn’t do well at GCSE. I know this doesn’t apply to your daughter. I also know because my brother was forced to go on study leave and got expelled and was only allowed in for his exams and only passed one gcse and was allowed to do btec entry level at tower hamlets.
Hi, oh! I'm not in London - I didn't realise this page was for London! I'm in Kent.

Still waiting for the school to call.....
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InvisibleDuck
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#47
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Is she very badly behaved at home? I'm going to go against the general tone of the thread and say that piling on punishment after punishment for a 17-year-old because of her behaviour at school is counterproductive in the long term. You've said that she isn't getting driving lessons, missed out on grass track racing, can't go out, has lost her phone, XBox, etc. Is this all because of her behaviour at school? Yes, it's wrong for her to be disruptive and rude, but she's clearly unhappy there. All these punishments won't change what she's doing, but they'll make her resentful of both the school and you.

I hated school and left at 16. My parents would never have 'punished' me at 17 as I was a young adult. Instead of treating her like a much younger teenager, be straight with her. If she wants to stay at that school, she needs to behave civilly there. If she doesn't want to stay, what does she want to do? In her situation, if she's getting 'enforced study leave' at this point in the year anyway, she might be better off leaving entirely and then sitting 3 A Levels (the two she likes, and a new one to replace Biology) as a private candidate. If she doesn't want to do that, she could go to a further education college and restart A Level courses there. It's a completely different environment to school. She doesn't even have to do A Levels at all - she could do something else and always have the option of returning to education later.

An extra year in education is nothing in the long term. Her mental health, and positive relationships with her family, are far more important. Let her know that there are options beyond being stuck there doing something that she dislikes - and do it in a positive, constructive way, not 'if you don't behave at school you'll have to do X'. Many schools give young people the impression that there's only one 'right' path through life, which is awful for those who try to follow it and don't fit, or have things go wrong, as has happened here. It doesn't matter how good the school is if it's not the best environment for her right now.
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swanseajack1
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#48
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, oh! I'm not in London - I didn't realise this page was for London! I'm in Kent.

Still waiting for the school to call.....
Idont know Kent but it is a wide area. How far would Reigate College be. I looked for someone else and came accross it recently
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JJJJJAAAAMES
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#49
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, oh! I'm not in London - I didn't realise this page was for London! I'm in Kent.

Still waiting for the school to call.....
this page isn't for London, this weirdo just assumed you're in London
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username4530544
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#50
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Hi, I spoke to the head of 6th form.

Nothing major, just ongoing little issues.

She will not wear her lanyard, refused to go into form. Nothing about biology, phew. Still not good though.

They will not kick her out, she has until the end of next week before the enforced study leave. This means that she is only allowed on the school property during lessons.

The head of 6th form thanked me for our support. She said a lot of parents become defensive.
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swanseajack1
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#51
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, I spoke to the head of 6th form.

Nothing major, just ongoing little issues.

She will not wear her lanyard, refused to go into form. Nothing about biology, phew. Still not good though.

They will not kick her out, she has until the end of next week before the enforced study leave. This means that she is only allowed on the school property during lessons.

The head of 6th form thanked me for our support. She said a lot of parents become defensive.
To be honest with you this solves nothing and all you are doing is creating your daughter's further resentment towards you. I can understand why your daughter wont discuss anything with you as she cannot trust you and feels you are on the same side as the school.

Your daughter needs to get away from Biology and that unhelpful school and until that happens her behaviour towards you will get worse. For them to say she cant restart year 12 again shows they have no interest in the student but are only interested in their rigid policies. There are many throughout the UK who restart year 12 and dont get told it cant be done for finance reasons and for you to be accepting their rigid policies rather than supporting your daughter explains why she reacts to you the way she does. She clearly feels she cannot rely on your support.
.
For her sake and happiness help her get out of this position. Are satisfied you have an extremely unhappy daughter who is going to resent you forever. You might look good in the schools eyes but certainly wont in your daughter's. Sociology would be a good fit with Psychology but ultimately it is your daughter's choice
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mnot
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#52
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(Original post by swanseajack1)
To be honest with you this solves nothing and all you are doing is creating your daughter's further resentment towards you. I can understand why your daughter wont discuss anything with you as she cannot trust you and feels you are on the same side as the school.

Your daughter needs to get away from Biology and that unhelpful school and until that happens her behaviour towards you will get worse. For them to say she cant restart year 12 again shows they have no interest in the student but are only interested in their rigid policies. There are many throughout the UK who restart year 12 and dont get told it cant be done for finance reasons and for you to be accepting their rigid policies rather than supporting your daughter explains why she reacts to you the way she does. She clearly feels she cannot rely on your support.
.
For her sake and happiness help her get out of this position. Are satisfied you have an extremely unhappy daughter who is going to resent you forever. You might look good in the schools eyes but certainly wont in your daughter's. Sociology would be a good fit with Psychology but ultimately it is your daughter's choice
I think this a bit OTT,

I agree removing her from the school and re-starting A-levels seems like the appropriate solution. Realistically coping with 1 A-Level for 2 years is not the end of the world, I think its more of attitude problem with her daughter, needs to stop feeling sorry for herself and get on with it.

If she is unwilling to act like a normal student and be respectful then she should get a full-time job, not waste an opportunity for education.
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swanseajack1
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#53
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It isnt about 1 A level over 2 years. A levels need to be taken at the same time so there are 2 choices. Fast tracking an A level in 1 year so all are taken next year or restarting year 12 and taking all exams in June 2021. What is clearly obvious is the daughter is 1 extremely unhappy girl who needs parental support to help her change subjects but the mother isnt doing this and is more interested in supporting the school. No wonder the student wont discuss the matter with her mother who she clearly rightly sees as part of the problem. The mother is more interested in trying to force a very unhappy daughter in a school doing subjects she hates than attempting to resolve the issued by moving her daughter elsewhere doing subjects she would be happy with.
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Stefanidi
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#54
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(Original post by idontkn)
What about tower hamlets college? It has really improved and they are supportive as they created different buildings for A level students and btec students. They also take on anyone whether their behaviour is good or bad, and anyone who didn’t do well at GCSE. I know this doesn’t apply to your daughter. I also know because my brother was forced to go on study leave and got expelled and was only allowed in for his exams and only passed one gcse and was allowed to do btec entry level at tower hamlets.
Tower Hamlets...XD
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Paypurr
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(Original post by swanseajack1)
It isnt about 1 A level over 2 years. A levels need to be taken at the same time so there are 2 choices. Fast tracking an A level in 1 year so all are taken next year or restarting year 12 and taking all exams in June 2021. What is clearly obvious is the daughter is 1 extremely unhappy girl who needs parental support to help her change subjects but the mother isnt doing this and is more interested in supporting the school. No wonder the student wont discuss the matter with her mother who she clearly rightly sees as part of the problem. The mother is more interested in trying to force a very unhappy daughter in a school doing subjects she hates than attempting to resolve the issued by moving her daughter elsewhere doing subjects she would be happy with.
That’s really unnecessary and rude to judge her parenting and intentions. Her daughter is refusing to engage in biology because she left it too late to change and instead of getting on with it and dealing with it as a young adult, is behaving badly. Which doesn’t resolve anything.

Yes, retaking her a levels at a different institution might be a good option. She’s in her final year, all she has to do is get an E in biology to pass, albeit an iffy grade she still has chance to get into university if she does great in her other exams.

You don’t necessarily like everything in life, and you will have to do things you don’t like so her behaving like this isn’t good for her. Has nothing to do with her parents because they’ve tried and there is only so much then can physically do. They can’t force her to study or go to class. She has to take responsibility for herself as she’ll be 17/18.
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mnot
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(Original post by Paypurr)
That’s really unnecessary and rude to judge her parenting and intentions. Her daughter is refusing to engage in biology because she left it too late to change and instead of getting on with it and dealing with it as a young adult, is behaving badly. Which doesn’t resolve anything.

Yes, retaking her a levels at a different institution might be a good option. She’s in her final year, all she has to do is get an E in biology to pass, albeit an iffy grade she still has chance to get into university if she does great in her other exams.

You don’t necessarily like everything in life, and you will have to do things you don’t like so her behaving like this isn’t good for her. Has nothing to do with her parents because they’ve tried and there is only so much then can physically do. They can’t force her to study or go to class. She has to take responsibility for herself as she’ll be 17/18.
I agree with this, but i would say even if she doesn't like the subject it doesn't stop her aiming for top grades...

I think she is acting more like a toddler having a temper tantrum, missed the opportunity to change A-level so throws her toys out if the pram. In reality she just needs to grow up.
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swanseajack1
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(Original post by Paypurr)
That’s really unnecessary and rude to judge her parenting and intentions. Her daughter is refusing to engage in biology because she left it too late to change and instead of getting on with it and dealing with it as a young adult, is behaving badly. Which doesn’t resolve anything.

Yes, retaking her a levels at a different institution might be a good option. She’s in her final year, all she has to do is get an E in biology to pass, albeit an iffy grade she still has chance to get into university if she does great in her other exams.

You don’t necessarily like everything in life, and you will have to do things you don’t like so her behaving like this isn’t good for her. Has nothing to do with her parents because they’ve tried and there is only so much then can physically do. They can’t force her to study or go to class. She has to take responsibility for herself as she’ll be 17/18.
The daughters behaviour is a cry for help which her mother isnt offering. Many students dont like the subjects they have chosen and change subjects and restart year 12. This is very common and this is a very unusual school that forces a student to continue with a subject they detest but then most parents would back their child in that circumstance. This girls mother is backing the school and the girl clearly resents it. The mother says her daughter wont speak to her. Is there any wonder why when she knows it to be pontless
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Paypurr
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(Original post by mnot)
I agree with this, but i would say even if she doesn't like the subject it doesn't stop her aiming for top grades...

I think she is acting more like a toddler having a temper tantrum, missed the opportunity to change A-level so throws her toys out if the pram. In reality she just needs to grow up.
Oh I totally agree with you, there is no reason she can’t aim for a very good grade. I just think it’s a shame to cause all this trouble and upset when all she needs is an E.

I don’t want to overstep but it does sound like she’s throwing a tantrum. Which isn’t good for her future prospects if this is how she’ll deal with things.

I feel sorry for the mum and hope you get this sorted soon!
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Muttley79
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, her car has been sitting on the driveway for the past 6 months, my husband buys and sells cars sometimes. She has had no driving lessons yet.

She promised that she would change after the summer holiday.

The school said she is so stubborn and should join a debating team.

I really don't know where she has got this attitude from as she wasn't dragged up.

My other 2 are not like this at all.

I'll see what excuse the school give tomorrow.
What does she want to do in the future?

Can she move school and start again?

I'm a teacher and feel that the school should have been more pro-active in offering an AS alongside the 2 A levels.
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swanseajack1
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(Original post by Muttley79)
What does she want to do in the future?

Can she move school and start again?

I'm a teacher and feel that the school should have been more pro-active in offering an AS alongside the 2 A levels.
Well said coming from the voice of experience. How many of your students have changed courses and restarted their A levels. This school's intransigence is very difficult to understand. The whole essence of education is to put the student first which sadly many schools fail to do and this is a prime example.
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