Muttley79
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#61
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#61
(Original post by swanseajack1)
Well said coming from the voice of experience. How many of your students have changed courses and restarted their A levels. This school's intransigence is very difficult to understand. The whole essence of education is to put the student first which sadly many schools fail to do and this is a prime example.
Quite a few do change - there is a deadline but we'd let someone drop a subject rather than have this sort of situation. There's always an EPQ to pick up or an additional AS to pick up. It might just be a personality clash with this teacher which is no-one's fault but the school should be big enough to give her a way out.
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username4530544
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#62
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#62
(Original post by Paypurr)
That’s really unnecessary and rude to judge her parenting and intentions. Her daughter is refusing to engage in biology because she left it too late to change and instead of getting on with it and dealing with it as a young adult, is behaving badly. Which doesn’t resolve anything.

Yes, retaking her a levels at a different institution might be a good option. She’s in her final year, all she has to do is get an E in biology to pass, albeit an iffy grade she still has chance to get into university if she does great in her other exams.

You don’t necessarily like everything in life, and you will have to do things you don’t like so her behaving like this isn’t good for her. Has nothing to do with her parents because they’ve tried and there is only so much then can physically do. They can’t force her to study or go to class. She has to take responsibility for herself as she’ll be 17/18.
Thank you for your support. My daughter is being childish. I have tried, I support my children. There is only so much I can do. She is 17 and a half now. You are correct in the reason for her behaviour, which I find absolutely shocking and she certainly was not brought up to be so rude and obnoxious.
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username4530544
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#63
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(Original post by mnot)
I agree with this, but i would say even if she doesn't like the subject it doesn't stop her aiming for top grades...

I think she is acting more like a toddler having a temper tantrum, missed the opportunity to change A-level so throws her toys out if the pram. In reality she just needs to grow up.
She is being an absolute toddler. I asked her to call the teacher's bluff and study hard and get a good grade!
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swanseajack1
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#64
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#64
(Original post by boble1)
She is being an absolute toddler. I asked her to call the teacher's bluff and study hard and get a good grade!
Do you know why she dislikes this teacher so much.
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mnot
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#65
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(Original post by swanseajack1)
Your attitude explains why she doesnt trust you and you have only yourself to blame should the relationship fall apart. Do you know why she dislikes this teacher so much.
OP ignore this,

Jack i think you've gone beyond rude, to borderline abusive.
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swanseajack1
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#66
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(Original post by mnot)
OP ignore this,

Jack i think you've gone beyond rude, to borderline abusive.
Lets try and put this in more detail. The daughter is extremely unhappy with Biology and or the teacher. We dont know why. The daughter doesnt want to discuss matters with her mother. The mother blames the daughter and is unwilling to consider possible solutions. The daughter realises that it is pointless discussing matters with her mother as nothing will ever be achieved and it is just going to lead to arguments. The daughter is already resentful and this is likely to increase. As the daughter gets older she will always remember that when she needed her mother's support it wasnt there. This set of circumstances could very lead to her not wanting to bother with her mother in the future. Not abusive just honest.
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TheRealSaifali
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#67
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#67
there might be an underlying reason to her acting this way, mental health issues, insecurities & home issues (which is probably not the case since you seem genuinely worried for her education and needs).

Maybe you and your daughter should go into school when you are ready & know that she will commit to her education and somehow persuade the teachers to allow her back into education, as its the last year and hopefully alls well with extra help & revision with catchup she’d be passing all her exams!
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holly6901
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#68
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(Original post by boble1)
Hi, yes I understand that she is not going to be able to disrupt others any longer, but this is what she wants, to not be at school. In my eyes, this is her getting her own way and I think she will feel as if she has won and it's just as ridiculous as when kids are excluded for a couple of days for whatever reasons.

I'm a stay at home mother, and TBH, I don't want her home all day. She never did any of her homework, or if she did, it was the bare minimal. There is no way she will be able to teach herself - she is doing chemistry A level and is struggling as it is - this is her favourite subject and she got top marks in her GCSE exam.
it's not just about what she wants others need to work too and they probably get complaints when she's there
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lizzyuk
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#69
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#69
Is it the actual subject or the teacher that she dislikes? I loved biology in GCSEs and got an A in it, went to college and took biology Alevel and couldn't crack it, the teacher was lovely but she just couldn't teach me biology. I ended up completely failing first year and took an EPQ in second year instead. Is it possible for her to change teachers as she may not like biology either due to the teacher or the teaching style. It is odd that the school won't let her drop it, I know she missed the deadline but in certain circumstances from my experience the school will try and work with the student. I suggest maybe looking at a new college or school and see if she can retake her Alevels with a different subject, or looking at BTECs or apprenticeships.
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username4530544
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#70
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#70
(Original post by swanseajack1)
Your attitude explains why she doesnt trust you and you have only yourself to blame should the relationship fall apart. Do you know why she dislikes this teacher so much.
Wow, just wow.

How dare you be so rude.

I came here for advice and support, not for you, who does not know me at all, to criticise me and my parenting skills.
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Scotney
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#71
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(Original post by boble1)
Wow, just wow.

How dare you be so rude.

I came here for advice and support, not for you, who does not know me at all, to criticise me and my parenting skills.
Dear boble1 pay no heed to above poster who is obviously projecting his own issues onto this situation. I may have been forthright last night but I do not doubt you are a very kind mother and you say you generally get on well with your daughter. You are right in thinking it is your daughter who is behaving badly and she may have to find out the hard way what mucking up her A levels will mean. Who would be a parent huh!
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username4530544
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#72
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(Original post by Scotney)
Dear boble1 pay no heed to above poster who is obviously projecting his own issues onto this situation. I may have been forthright last night but I do not doubt you are a very kind mother and you say you generally get on well with your daughter. You are right in thinking it is your daughter who is behaving badly and she may have to find out the hard way what mucking up her A levels will mean. Who would be a parent huh!
Ah thank you so much for your kind words. It's much appreciated.
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swanseajack1
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#73
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(Original post by boble1)
Ah thank you so much for your kind words. It's much appreciated.
Your own admission is that you are supporting the school and its restrictive policies and accepting them even though you are aware that they are making your daughter very unhappy rather than try a route to make your daughter happier. Your daughter has shown in her actions in not discussing the matter with you that she sees little point in trying to discuss things as you are blaming her for the actions. This in itself is only going one way. Your daughter is 6 months from being an adult. What are you going to do then when she is responsible for her own decisions. She will remember the lack of support you have given her long after leaving school and this will affect your relationship forever. What is said is correct. You came on here for help and help is what is being given even if you dislike what is said.
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Stefanidi
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#74
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#74
(Original post by swanseajack1)
Your attitude explains why she doesnt trust you and you have only yourself to blame should the relationship fall apart. Do you know why she dislikes this teacher so much.
PRSOM
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Scotney
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#75
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(Original post by swanseajack1)
Your own admission is that you are supporting the school and its restrictive policies and accepting them even though you are aware that they are making your daughter very unhappy rather than try a route to make your daughter happier. Your daughter has shown in her actions in not discussing the matter with you that she sees little point in trying to discuss things as you are blaming her for the actions. This in itself is only going one way. Your daughter is 6 months from being an adult. What are you going to do then when she is responsible for her own decisions. She will remember the lack of support you have given her long after leaving school and this will affect your relationship forever. What is said is correct. You came on here for help and help is what is being given even if you dislike what is said.
Jack do you know something we do not. I usually find you give very good advice on here but I find no basis for what you are saying. If the child was being bullied or had Mh issues then that would be different. My daughter had both and it was awful but this is not the case here as I read it. Some teenagers are just kicking against the system and that seems to be the case here.
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username4530544
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#76
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#76
(Original post by swanseajack1)
Your own admission is that you are supporting the school and its restrictive policies and accepting them even though you are aware that they are making your daughter very unhappy rather than try a route to make your daughter happier. Your daughter has shown in her actions in not discussing the matter with you that she sees little point in trying to discuss things as you are blaming her for the actions. This in itself is only going one way. Your daughter is 6 months from being an adult. What are you going to do then when she is responsible for her own decisions. She will remember the lack of support you have given her long after leaving school and this will affect your relationship forever. What is said is correct. You came on here for help and help is what is being given even if you dislike what is said.
So you don't think that not wearing her lanyard, talking during mass, being on her mobile phone during lessons, is childish?

I have asked her tonight if she'd like to go in just for lessons. I will drive her there and back 3 or 4 time a day because she is my child and I love her and would do anything to make her happy. She said no.

I then asked her if she wants to leave and find something else to do. Again she said no.

Tell me how I am not being supportive then?
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999tigger
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#77
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#77
(Original post by boble1)
Hi

My daughter is in her last year of her A levels.

She is disruptive, rude and not working hard. I've been into the school many times and now she is on her last warning before being excluded.

I had an email today saying they want to talk to me about putting her on "enforced study leave".

Does anyone know what that means?

Thank you
Is she at all interested in doing well, passing her A levels or having a career?


It will mean they dont want her at school, but will let her sit exams and offer some support i.e mark work. Its nice of them considering they could just expel her. She obviously doesnt care, so ask her what she wants to do as if she is going top flunk exams then maybe a different course or an apprenticeship will be better?

I only read your OP btw, didnt realise there were 70+ posts after, which may have revealed new info.
Last edited by 999tigger; 1 week ago
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Stefanidi
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#78
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(Original post by Scotney)
And you can get lost you little troll!
Excuse me?! Please see my first post on this thread - I've only offered practical advice.
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username4530544
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#79
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(Original post by Stefanidi)
Excuse me?! Please see my first post on this thread - I've only offered practical advice.
No, you didn't offer advice - you blamed me and said that as a stay at home mother, I need to do more.

Please see my above post for an update.
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Stefanidi
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#80
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(Original post by boble1)
No, you didn't offer advice - you blamed me and said that as a stay at home mother, I need to do more.

Please see my above post for an update.
This was my post:
She got an A* in chemistry? Tbh I don’t mean to offend you but any child’s happiness starts from the home. You need to try and get through to her, maybe you’re being too lenient etc. And since you’re a stay at home mum I really feel like you should be doing more. I barely saw my mum as she had to work all the hours so make the most of the time you have to nurture her. Make sure there are no underlying issues at her school because she may not be forthcoming. If there are then change sixth forms, whatever it takes, but you must ensure she makes the most of all opportunities that come her way. Good luck 🙂

I offered you advice in that I pointed out, as several other posters have tried to, that you need to support her instead of completely blaming her like you have done on this thread as at her age she'll see you as taking the school's side. There's nothing more for me to say as you aren't accepting it so I'm not sure why you and Scotney are ganging up on me for something that is inherently your problem. As I've already said, good luck.
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