i love my girlfriend but i cry when im with her Watch

Anonymous #1
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i love her to bits i do shes so important to me but she made a mistake and no not cheating and its not even bad, she told me she wasnt going to drink and then she did with her mates, like usually i wouldnt have an issue but she was meeting me the next day and she was hungover and to me that just showed lack of respect carelessness and loss of trust. and i overreacted i fully did because i wouldnt give a **** before that i guess we just got really close.

but since that day (near end of july) i felt distant but i was longing for that love we had that emotional attachment i loved her to bits. i still am with the hope i can do something to bring it back because everyday is agony i feel **** even when im with or without her but i also feel like the most comfortable person when im with her because shes the only person i cry to as she never judges me shes so amazing. i feel sick and ive lost so much weight because i dont want to it, i cough up bile sometimes and its getting worst. shes so caring and understanding, i dont know what it is anymore, the relationship or am i just depressed was that day a trigger of it? i need help anything because im so desperate now, its heading to our 6 months and i want it to be perfect but all i see is just me crying for hours on end. i have a 12 days break while not seeing her as im in canada if i cant fix myself there i dont know what will. i need some sort of answer because i want to be better because i dont want to spend whatever time i have left with her crying, i want to be loving caring and everything i was before. but i fear times running out ive resorted to cocaine weed and drinking at times and i dont want to.

breaking up is out of the question, i want to fix it and im determined because i love this girlso much.
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EmmaBellCompKid
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#2
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Im sorry to sound like a ******** but if she is an adult, you aren't allowed to get mad at her for drinking. You need to look at yourself and figure out why you got mad and work on that. Her drinking is not disrespectful. If she canceled your meetup because she was hungover it would make her "flakey" but not a bad person. You need to work on yourself and your own obvious insecurity before you see her again. You haven't even been going out for 6 months, and if you are already getting upset at her now, it won't work out for much longer.
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cheesecakelove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i love her to bits i do shes so important to me but she made a mistake and no not cheating and its not even bad, she told me she wasnt going to drink and then she did with her mates, like usually i wouldnt have an issue but she was meeting me the next day and she was hungover and to me that just showed lack of respect carelessness and loss of trust. and i overreacted i fully did because i wouldnt give a **** before that i guess we just got really close.

but since that day (near end of july) i felt distant but i was longing for that love we had that emotional attachment i loved her to bits. i still am with the hope i can do something to bring it back because everyday is agony i feel **** even when im with or without her but i also feel like the most comfortable person when im with her because shes the only person i cry to as she never judges me shes so amazing. i feel sick and ive lost so much weight because i dont want to it, i cough up bile sometimes and its getting worst. shes so caring and understanding, i dont know what it is anymore, the relationship or am i just depressed was that day a trigger of it? i need help anything because im so desperate now, its heading to our 6 months and i want it to be perfect but all i see is just me crying for hours on end. i have a 12 days break while not seeing her as im in canada if i cant fix myself there i dont know what will. i need some sort of answer because i want to be better because i dont want to spend whatever time i have left with her crying, i want to be loving caring and everything i was before. but i fear times running out ive resorted to cocaine weed and drinking at times and i dont want to.

breaking up is out of the question, i want to fix it and im determined because i love this girlso much.
Why do you have a problem with your girlfriend drinking with her friends?

I think if you are unhappy in the relationship, the two of you should take a break or end the relationship. You need the time to focus on yourself and your health, seek professional help if needed to allow you to work through your problems. Yes, you love your girlfriend but your own health and mindset needs to take priority at the moment.
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Luca Km
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shes 16 but like i wasn't mad for her drinking i was mad that she knew she was meeting me the next day and then preceded to be hungover, like i overrecated deffinatly but i think i was in the right to be a bit annoyed and the fact she told me she wasnt just annoyed me a bit more. and im not gonna lie yeah i would probably be even more pissed if she cancelled but i also feel like she shouldnt have got to the point of that. and yes im insecure and ive been trying to work on myself and i agree thats why i want to change but idk what is the actual issue because i forgave her ages ago about that
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by cheesecakelove)
Why do you have a problem with your girlfriend drinking with her friends?

I think if you are unhappy in the relationship, the two of you should take a break or end the relationship. You need the time to focus on yourself and your health, seek professional help if needed to allow you to work through your problems. Yes, you love your girlfriend but your own health and mindset needs to take priority at the moment.
i agree on the break i have 2 weeks were im not seeing her but i dont want her to think im using it to spend time away from her, but i am not ending it 100% not because the only thing i want is to be happy with her, dont get me wrong i love spending time with her but i have this empty feeling still though sometimes i feel warm and happy but rarely and i dont have a problem hats the thing its just triggered on that day, like she can drink its just she said she wouldnt and i didnt want her hungover but she was.
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cheesecakelove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
i agree on the break i have 2 weeks were im not seeing her but i dont want her to think im using it to spend time away from her, but i am not ending it 100% not because the only thing i want is to be happy with her, dont get me wrong i love spending time with her but i have this empty feeling still though sometimes i feel warm and happy but rarely and i dont have a problem hats the thing its just triggered on that day, like she can drink its just she said she wouldnt and i didnt want her hungover but she was.
You can be honest with her about the way you are feeling if you are comfortable to do so but your mental health and wellbeing should take top priority and needs dealing with before things get worse.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by cheesecakelove)
You can be honest with her about the way you are feeling if you are comfortable to do so but your mental health and wellbeing should take top priority and needs dealing with before things get worse.
yeah thats true but i really dont wanna lose her to gain better mental health
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cheesecakelove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
yeah thats true but i really dont wanna lose her to gain better mental health
I understand that you care for your girlfriend but if how you feel is affecting how you live your life and act in your relationship, you need to address this first.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by cheesecakelove)
I understand that you care for your girlfriend but if how you feel is affecting how you live your life and act in your relationship, you need to address this first.
lets say i do like ive told her all this but i really dont wanna have to break, and deffo not breakup how do i resolve this little by little?
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
yeah thats true but i really dont wanna lose her to gain better mental health
you are both still children. It more than likely wont work in the long term anyway.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
you are both still children. It more than likely wont work in the long term anyway.
thats not the point though
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Anonymous #3
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If you aren't happy with her you need to end it. I've been feeling **** for weeks about my gf since she just isn't engaged when I message her about things (she just says "yeah" to everything) but when I see her it makes me happier and want to stay together. She's been working a lot recently so I sort of understood her being tired and not having much time for me but the other night she stayed up til 4:30 after doing a close talking to one of her work mates. We used to be the ones staying up til 4:30 having deep chats but those days are clearly over and I'm gonna break things off with her tomorrow.
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cheesecakelove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
lets say i do like ive told her all this but i really dont wanna have to break, and deffo not breakup how do i resolve this little by little?
If you have told her, you would need to discuss with your girlfriend what the best thing for you and the relationship would be to do. After you have agreed, you can decide your next steps from there.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by cheesecakelove)
If you have told her, you would need to discuss with your girlfriend what the best thing for you and the relationship would be to do. After you have agreed, you can decide your next steps from there.
i have discussed with her quite a bit, shes very supportive and ive seeked out therapist and my school is planning to give me a councelluer which i hope helps. if not i guess medication and if not then i guess i know what to do.
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