Should I break up with my girlfriend? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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I'm starting university next year, I'm worried that I won't be able to experience everything and focus on myself as much I should/need while balancing uni work, social life, mental health and a relationship.
I've been with her since I was 16 and feel like I'm too young to be in such a serious relationship and have never really experience being 'free'.

We've been together for 4 years and I can't decide what's best for me. I know if I decide to break up with her we will never get back together, Im so worried about regretting it. We live together right now and still would until I get student accommodation probably. Help me please
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Apachecow
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#2
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In my opinion the ONLY reason to break up with your girlfriend is if you think the relationship is not going anywhere and has run its course. DO NOT break up with your girlfriend in the vein hope something better or more fun will come along.Being in a relationship is so much better than grafting on the dating scene.
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Retired_Messiah
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Being 'free' as in single at freshers provides you far less benefit than people sell you, unless you're committed to really wanting to sleep around. First port of call in this is whether you actually like the girl or not.
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Anonymous #1
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By free I don't so much mean that, I mean more as in, just having to only worry about myself.
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Retired_Messiah
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(Original post by Anonymous)
By free I don't so much mean that, I mean more as in, just having to only worry about myself.
Being single for long periods compounds any self doubt you have about yourself, add on the regret of ending an otherwise healthy relationship and it's blatantly a net loss.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Retired_Messiah)
Being single for long periods compounds any self doubt you have about yourself, add on the regret of ending an otherwise healthy relationship and it's blatantly a net loss.
Yeah i get what you mean. Part of me feels like I can't learn to like myself and have better mental health if I'm taking more of not just me
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Anonymous #2
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Break up with your girlfriend, coz I’m bored...... of these threads.
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Retired_Messiah
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yeah i get what you mean. Part of me feels like I can't learn to like myself and have better mental health if I'm taking more of not just me
With respect, that line of thought makes no sense whatsoever.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Break up with your girlfriend, coz I’m bored...... of these threads.
Sorry that your bored of these threads but this is kinda serious stuff that people ask when they have no one else to turn to for opinions
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Retired_Messiah)
With respect, that line of thought makes no sense whatsoever.
How so?
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Retired_Messiah
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(Original post by Anonymous)
How so?
You seem to be considering your relationship as solely a burden. If you actually like the relationship, then it blatantly isn't. You are not going to help your mental health by removing a positive thing.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Retired_Messiah)
You seem to be considering your relationship as solely a burden. If you actually like the relationship, then it blatantly isn't. You are not going to help your mental health by removing a positive thing.
Your right. I guess I just see so many people say that they leave their partners to work on themselves that I feel like that's the thing to do.
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Amon-ster
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#13
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Don't do it. No point in losing a good woman over something as trivial as you want to be 'free'. Yeah free to realise it isn't as hyped as it is then go running back to your girl.
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Anonymous #1
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I guess I just worry about not doing as well as I could in uni if I have a relationship to focus on too
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Scotney
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#15
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Sorry that your bored of these threads but this is kinda serious stuff that people ask when they have no one else to turn to for opinions
I would suggest you have a break.It will help you work out what you want. It sounds to me as if you want out.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Sorry that your bored of these threads but this is kinda serious stuff that people ask when they have no one else to turn to for opinions
It’s the name of a song. I added a little pun to it. Sorry
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Retired_Messiah
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#17
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I guess I just worry about not doing as well as I could in uni if I have a relationship to focus on too
Honestly anybody I've met who's broke up before uni when there's nothing wrong with the partner have all seemed to regret it. You can always break up later down the line if you feel like your new life at uni is making the relationship untenable, there's no need to do something potentially stupid right now.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Retired_Messiah)
Honestly anybody I've met who's broke up before uni when there's nothing wrong with the partner have all seemed to regret it. You can always break up later down the line if you feel like your new life at uni is making the relationship untenable, there's no need to do something potentially stupid right now.
Your right. I shouldn't end it before I even know if it can work. Realising that I'm pretty dumb for thinking about doing it before even trying
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Scotney
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#19
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(Original post by Retired_Messiah)
Honestly anybody I've met who's broke up before uni when there's nothing wrong with the partner have all seemed to regret it. You can always break up later down the line if you feel like your new life at uni is making the relationship untenable, there's no need to do something potentially stupid right now.
The thing is I am not hearing that he particularly loves or cares for this girl. She is just a habit right now. They have been together for 4years and he wants to have time to'work on himself' and be free. If he was invested in this girl these are strange atritudes to have.
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Retired_Messiah
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(Original post by Scotney)
The thing is I am not hearing that he particularly loves or cares for this girl. She is just a habit right now. They have been together for 4years and he wants to have time to'work on himself' and be free. If he was invested in this girl these are strange atritudes to have.
What, you expecting him to write love poetry? People going to uni can get ****ing stupid over it, this sort of armchair psychology isn't productive.
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