What are people’s problems with me? Watch
2 years on a girl tried to beat me up in dance changing rooms and got scratched her as self defence and she said “don’t touch me bruv” and then I said that I have cancer because I knew everyone thought it anyway. The girl who died backed me and said “she does”. Everyone kept staring at me and the girl who tried to beat me up, let me go. She said “does that make me a criminal?” “Are you going to snitch?”. I said no and walked away and they talked about me and then in year 11 when I was 16, another girl asked me if I said I got cancer for attention but I didn’t, and I explained what happened in year 7.
I regret saying that obviously and people in primary school know what I went through but it wasn’t cancer. I shouldn’t have said that but I only said it at the time to get her to let me go and people thought it anyway. In a way I wish the rumours were true so then these rumours wouldn’t go around. Plus how do they know it isn’t true? When I heard the main bully died I was glad at first but obviously had sympathy for her mum later.
I moved for sixth form and got bullied there but it wasn’t verbal bullying. I had to drop out of year 13 because I got sick due to bullying and I had suicidal thoughts because I know this life is all about illness and bullying. I wanted it all to stop. I was also upset at the prospect of never studying again because I have completely lost my head.
I know I need to move on with my life but I have a lot of time on my hands since I am not working or studying now and just at home doing nothing because of my illness, but I guess I need to forget about that and move on.