Should I kick my partner out? Watch

Anonymous #1
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So..my partner is a full time student and I'm a full tim worker. They have no money and I'm the only one with the money although I dont make much since I've got debt with the car. Anyways.

I got this small house from my grandad and I want her to live with me,but I also want her to start paying Bill's such as electricity and stuff. Shes a little bit against that since shes got no opportunity to work because her studies really take 200% of her time. She says I should stop smoking weed and pay for the bills instead of asking her to pay because the says it feels like shes gonna pay for something i could've payed for. Is this fair? Should I kick her out?
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Rock Fan
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(Original post by Anonymous)
So..my partner is a full time student and I'm a full tim worker. They have no money and I'm the only one with the money although I dont make much since I've got debt with the car. Anyways.

I got this small house from my grandad and I want her to live with me,but I also want her to start paying Bill's such as electricity and stuff. Shes a little bit against that since shes got no opportunity to work because her studies really take 200% of her time. She says I should stop smoking weed and pay for the bills instead of asking her to pay because the says it feels like shes gonna pay for something i could've payed for. Is this fair? Should I kick her out?
I think she's fair, think what you could buy. Also not her fault she is in full time education you knew what you were getting into when you got with her
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Rock Fan)
I think she's fair, think what you could buy. Also not her fault she is in full time education you knew what you were getting into when you got with her
Yes but I'm just asking her to pay 50%. Why should I let her live here for free?
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Deggs_14
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And where would she go if you evicted her? Doesn’t seem like a fulfilling relationship if separating from her is the first thing that comes on you mind.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Deggs_14)
And where would she go if you evicted her? Doesn’t seem like a fulfilling relationship if separating from her is the first thing that comes on you
Back to her home country in Germany. Thing is shes not from England.
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Anonymous #2
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What kind of education is she in? Doesn't she get a student loan, a portion of which she would be spending anyway on student accommodation?
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Anonymous #3
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If I'm completely honest you're acting like an entitled ****. If you want anyone to live with you, you need to grow up a bit and prioritize what's important. As a full-time student the return on the investment for not working now will be exponential. If you actually like someone you wouldn't be putting them into impossible situations like this. Either grow up or lose her. If smoking weed is more important than keeping your partner then I think your partner deserves someone better than you!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Anonymous)
If I'm completely honest you're acting like an entitled ****. If you want anyone to live with you, you need to grow up a bit and prioritize what's important. As a full-time student the return on the investment for not working now will be exponential. If you actually like someone you wouldn't be putting them into impossible situations like this. Either grow up or lose her. If smoking weed is more important than keeping your partner then I think your partner deserves someone better than you!
But she cant be living on my money all the time can she? Shes got sunday and Saturday which would be good for work. My weeds got nothing to do with wether my Bill's should be paid or not... I make the money and I feed her and she just sits there not doing anything while I'm making all the money and will be paying the Bill's. all I'm asking is for her to pay half the bills but for some reason the idea is not something shes keen on.
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MidgetFever
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I don't understand why everyone's bashing OP so much, if she's a student then she'll be entitled to some form of maintenance loan, no? A loan that's intended to go towards living costs such as rent and food.

If she's got the money then it should go towards bills. Assuming that OP is also paying bills ofc.
Last edited by MidgetFever; 4 weeks ago
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bones-mccoy
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There's got be some kind of compromise, surely? I'm lucky in that I live with my partner and he takes care of most financial matters - I'm currently a student and not working, though even when I did have a job he still earned significantly more than me. I always offer to pay my way but my partner has recently got a new job with a pay rise so he says it's fine. I take care of my own phone bills, Netflix account etc, I buy all the food shopping, takeaways, bits for the house etc, pay my share of the council tax (or did when I wasn't a student) and do all of the cleaning and general household chores, so it's not like I just sit around doing nothing. And I'll certainly be paying 50% once I get a job in the industry I want to work in.

I think it's the fact she's just expecting to be able to live there for free rather than offering to pay for at least some things even though her financial situation isn't the best. A truly equal relationship is one where you can discuss things and come to some kind of compromise. Perhaps she could pay 25% of the bills? Or arrange it so that she does all the chores around the house so you don't need to worry about that?
Last edited by bones-mccoy; 4 weeks ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by MidgetFever)
I don't understand why everyone's bashing OP so much, if she's a student then she'll be entitled to some form of maintenance loan, no? A loan that's intended to go towards living costs such as rent and food.

If she's got the money then it should go towards bills.
She says she doesnt want to take a loan since shes doing her best not to. She actually moved here for me and quit her education in Germany so she could be with me. Which is why she doesnt want a loan since we are moving together to Germany in a couple years or so. But yeah...Shes kinda selfish.
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Talon
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Money aside, do you want to live with her? If the answer is yes then the money shouldn't change that. She could work Saturday and Sunday, but maybe she wants to spend some time with you (though at this stage I can't imagine why)?

If you work full time and she is in full time education, it is not fair to expect her to pay 50% of the bills. If you are low on money and spending money on weed, stop buying the weed. It is not an essential item.

But she cant be living on my money all the time can she?
No, and it would be unreasonable to expect the situation to continue indefinitely, but at some point she is going to graduate and and start working. Then she can start paying towards the bills.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by bones-mccoy)
There's got be some kind of compromise, surely? I'm lucky in that I live with my partner and he takes care of most financial matters - I'm currently a student and not working, though even when I did have a job he still earned significantly more than me. I always offer to pay my way but my partner has recently got a new job with a pay rise so he says it's fine. I take care of my own phone bills, Netflix account etc, I buy all the food shopping, takeaways, bits for the house etc, pay my share of the council tax (or did when I wasn't a student) and do all of the cleaning and general household chores, so it's not like I just sit around doing nothing. And I'll certainly be paying 50% once I get a job in the industry I want to work in.

I think it's the fact she's just expecting to be able to live there for free rather than offering to pay for at least some things even though her financial situation isn't the best. A truly equal relationship is one where you can discuss things and come to some kind of compromise.
The only thing shes paying for is Netflix....laughably.
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Talon
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(Original post by Anonymous)
The only thing shes paying for is Netflix....laughably.
Why is that laughable? She is paying for what she can. You sound very ungrateful to actually have her in your life TBH.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Talon)
Money aside, do you want to live with her? If the answer is yes then the money shouldn't change that. She could work Saturday and Sunday, but maybe she wants to spend some time with you (though at this stage I can't imagine why)?

If you work full time and she is in full time education, it is not fair to expect her to pay 50% of the bills. If you are low on money and spending money on weed, stop buying the weed. It is not an essential item.



No, and it would be unreasonable to expect the situation to continue indefinitely, but at some point she is going to graduate and and start working. Then she can start paying towards the bills.
Shes insisting on getting a phd and it will take forever for her to get a normal job. She always says how this is time worth investing and she is willing to live like a rat for 10 years and then it will be all worth it. I dont understand. My weeds got nothing to do with this.
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Bang Outta Order
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You should care about your girlfriend. Stop doing drugs and support her. If anything, she should run away screaming from you, not get kicked out.

(Original post by Anonymous)
her home country in Germany. Thing is shes not from England.
*reads this*


Nah fam kick the minger out.
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MidgetFever
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She says she doesnt want to take a loan since shes doing her best not to. She actually moved here for me and quit her education in Germany so she could be with me. Which is why she doesnt want a loan since we are moving together to Germany in a couple years or so. But yeah...Shes kinda selfish.
What does moving to Germany have to do with not taking a loan? I don't understand how that will effect her unless they process student loans differently over there.
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Talon
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(Original post by Anonymous)
She says she doesnt want to take a loan since shes doing her best not to. She actually moved here for me and quit her education in Germany so she could be with me. Which is why she doesnt want a loan since we are moving together to Germany in a couple years or so. But yeah...Shes kinda selfish.
She quit education in Germany and moved here for you, started her education again here and now you are complaining that isn't paying enough? I hope you are a troll because I would feel very sorry for your partner if that is your attitude.
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Anonymous #4
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you guys need to break up
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Talon
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Shes insisting on getting a phd and it will take forever for her to get a normal job. She always says how this is time worth investing and she is willing to live like a rat for 10 years and then it will be all worth it. I dont understand. My weeds got nothing to do with this.
You brought up the weed so it becomes admissible as a topic of discussion. It obviously does have something to do with it - you would have more money if you weren't spending it on illegal drugs so it wouldn't be so much of a problem with her not paying as much.

I think you should kick her out. She is much better off without you.
Last edited by Talon; 4 weeks ago
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