Looks are overrated in dating Watch

stickylikehoney
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#1
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Looks are so overrated in dating.
How can you properly fall for someone based on looks alone? What melts my heart is their personality, how we click intellectual and whether they make me laugh.
Obviously, there is a line. If they are hideously obese and ugly you just won't fancy them. Looks are not nothing. But they are very little.
Going after "hotties" and "fit" guys and girls is just lame.
As long as they are over a 3 physically... what difference does it make really?

I was thinking about some of the guys I've been with.
One was gorgeous, like a 7-8 for looks but a 2-3 for personality.
I remember when he came to see me at Uni and all of my friends were like "Oh my God he so fit!" and that boosted my confidence to know he liked me.
But his personality was rubbish and the fact that he was good looking and had a good body turned me on for about a minute.
There was just no point.
What really works is their personality and mind.

One of the least attractive guys I've hooked up with was the best sex I've ever had.
He was also the fattest guy I've slept with (he wasn't huge but needed to lose a bit of weight.)
He was way better in bed than any of the fit gym bunnies I've had sex with.
His personality and caring nature made him attractive.

If they are say really good looking, like 8+, they know they are good looking and are often vain and shallow.
I'd much rather a down to earth guy who would just make me laugh.
What do you guys think?
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Dunnig Kruger
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I agree. It's all about having minimum standards. Minimum standards for looks, personality, character and compatibility in the core important things in life together as a couple.

Nobody's perfect. Good enough in all the key areas is good enough.

Great in almost every area, but not good enough in one area is not good enough for forming a happy long term relationship.
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Kitten in boots
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I consider looks to be important. I can’t bear the idea of being physically intimate with someone I’m not attracted to. There is also no shortage of good looking men with good personalities, so why settle for someone who isn’t physically attractive?
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CAB18022
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Oh yes i completely agree with you here (as a guy). The thing is though, unlike a lot of pretty girls, a lot of gym body guys know they’re physically attractive whereas (at least according to survey and anecdotal evidence) a lot of pretty girls don’t think they’re pretty. There’s a striking difference here because a lot of guys don’t have that same insecurity as girls.

And I can only speak from personal experience but 92% (random estimate) of girls i’ve tried to get with (usually relatively pretty) have always turned out to be he same: Always drunk, out partying all the time, void of personality, I could go on lol.

Usually when I see fit girls (in real life at least) i don’t bother approaching not initiating conversation. It is cowardly but, whatever. It’s usually because of experience where i’ve ran into too many fit girls who i’m just not good enough for (apparently, sorry for boosting my ego 🤣) and I don’t think that much effort is worth it in my honest opinion.

And to be honest, I am a lot less close with girls compared to boys (gender has nothing to do with that). That is why I only have a few close female friends mainly because i’ve seen girls who always act like they’re besties forever but, you realise their friendship is almost nothing like that and although i’ve Fallen out with many dudes, they weren’t really my friends anyway and the dudes i’m friends wothbare fantastic people, same with the few close female friends I have.

But, you’re post is SOOO refreshing, i’ve seen countless guys who think girls care about looks as much as guys when you’re quite evidently clear that this isn’t the case. And even at times I think that too because what I see from anecdotal experience. But, your post was a good read I cannot lie lol
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