Asian Men//Dilemma

This seems strange, why are you so obsessed with Asian guys? Of course Asian guys may be lovely, my concern is why you feel this inescapeable attraction, whilst in a relationship. Maybe you should just go for an Asian guy if the attraction is that strong.

Reply 2

Malsy

18

If you feel like you are having stronger attractons towards asain guys then surely you are not feeling much for your current bf then.

End it before it gets too complicated.

Reply 3

fleur_de_haine

16

Yes, yes, you're clearly racist and a complete harlot; you ought to be deeply and thoroughly ashamed of yourself. :rolleyes:

Seriously now, there are two issues here as far as I can see.

(i) Your attraction to the asian men.
(ii) Your dedication to your boyfriend.

With regard to the first one, people attracted to different groups of people for various reasons; you find asian men attractive for some reason and there's nothing wrong with that. Just try to avoid treating them as ethnic curios.

As for the second, as you say you can't imagine actually acting on your fantasies/urges so I'd assume that you're generally satisfied with your relationship to him. However, you might consider what's driving you to act in the way you are, and also, how this would make your current boyfriend feel.

Meh, I'm babbling along so I'll end it here. :eek:

Reply 4

Renal

17

They all get bum abscesses.

Reply 5

Rozzo89

12

Are you asian yourself?

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

no, i am white.

Reply 7

Anonymous

(Please do not de-anon as my boyf uses this site)

I have been going out with my boyf (who is white) for over a year and a half now. However, lately I can't stop thinking about Asian guys. I feel terribly guilty about this and not sure whether or not it is racist(?). Whenever I am out with friends I always try to make contact with the Asian guys, although I don't think I would ever cheat on him. Please help as I'm not sure what to do :frown:

To clear up the distinction, what do you mean by "asian guys". Chinese - japanese "asian" or Pakistani / Indian / Bengali asian. My friend started developing this, she's started to love really rough-looking, "gangster" or badboy Indians and Bengalis, which was weird as she is very innocent. So what do you mean precisely?

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

aster100

To clear up the distinction, what do you mean by "asian guys". Chinese - japanese "asian" or Pakistani / Indian / Bengali asian. My friend started developing this, she's started to love really rough-looking, "gangster" or badboy Indians and Bengalis, which was weird as she is very innocent. So what do you mean precisely?

by 'Asian' i am generally referring to Indian/Pakistani men.

Reply 9

Anonymous

by 'Asian' i am generally referring to Indian/Pakistani men.

Well seeing as my friend went through this "phase" I wouldn't mind discussing them with you. She also had a boyfriend (but they were about to split up) and that's when she told me about this obsession. In my view that's in no way racist; it's just a preference. Just like a preference for athletic guys / guys with green eyes etc. Nothing wrong with that. So no you're not in any way racist.

What in particular do you like about them? If you really want to know my friend liked their dark skin, attitude (though personally I think their attempts to act "gangster" are very annoying) and their "rough look". If you want me to dissuade you from liking them, I could give you a long list of bad stuff about them (in general) :s-smilie:

. I'm not sure what exactly you need to know here, so I think we could start by outlining what you like about them?

Reply 10

This is very odd, did this happen overnight? Personally i like all kinds of women, it seems strange how one day you can wake up feeling an immense attraction to one type. I could imagine having an attraction to a specific woman, but not a sudden attraction to a group.

Reply 11

Anonymous #1

OP

aster100

Well seeing as my friend went through this "phase" I wouldn't mind discussing them with you. She also had a boyfriend (but they were about to split up) and that's when she told me about this obsession. In my view that's in no way racist; it's just a preference. Just like a preference for athletic guys / guys with green eyes etc. Nothing wrong with that. So no you're not in any way racist.

What in particular do you like about them? If you really want to know my friend liked their dark skin, attitude (though personally I think their attempts to act "gangster" are very annoying) and their "rough look". If you want me to dissuade you from liking them, I could give you a long list of bad stuff about them (in general) :s-smilie:

. I'm not sure what exactly you need to know here, so I think we could start by outlining what you like about them?

I think it is more of a physcial attraction to be honest because I haven't met that many or know many as friends. I would appreciate it if anyone could dissuade me from liking them as this obsession that I have is ruining my relationship.

Reply 12

aster100

Well seeing as my friend went through this "phase" I wouldn't mind discussing them with you. She also had a boyfriend (but they were about to split up) and that's when she told me about this obsession. In my view that's in no way racist; it's just a preference. Just like a preference for athletic guys / guys with green eyes etc. Nothing wrong with that. So no you're not in any way racist.

What in particular do you like about them? If you really want to know my friend liked their dark skin, attitude (though personally I think their attempts to act "gangster" are very annoying) and their "rough look". If you want me to dissuade you from liking them, I could give you a long list of bad stuff about them (in general) :s-smilie:

. I'm not sure what exactly you need to know here, so I think we could start by outlining what you like about them?

I'd be interested to hear about this list. If it is a list of stereotypes, then surely one could be created about any race. Someone could create one regarding white english women, stating that they drink too much and are unfaithful, i have heard this from some people, some white such as an Italian i spoke to. I am not sure your list would be productive. Anyway if as you say it is just her preference, why would she need to be disuaded, it is as if you are saying it is wrong for her to feel this way. Obviously gangster types should be avoided, but not Asians in general.

Reply 13

George231086

I'd be interested to hear about this list. If it is a list of stereotypes, then surely one could be created about any race. Someone could create one regarding white english women, stating that they drink too much and are unfaithful, i have heard this from some people, some white such as an Italian i spoke to. I am not sure your list would be productive. Anyway if as you say it is just her preference, why would she need to be disuaded, it is as if you are saying it is wrong for her to feel this way. Obviously gangster types should be avoided, but not Asians in general.

Calm down dude; of course it's a list of stereotypes; what else could it be. I am half asian myself so I would know all about them, but this is not some racist attack on anyone, I'm just trying my best to help the OP. If you looked and read her replies, she wants to be dissuaded. And when did I say Asians should be avoided???? Seriously stop trying to undermine me when I'm trying to help the OP. I don't even know why you're trying to destabilise everything I say when you're not even helping. What are you trying to achieve?

Reply 14

Anonymous

I think it is more of a physcial attraction to be honest because I haven't met that many or know many as friends. I would appreciate it if anyone could dissuade me from liking them as this obsession that I have is ruining my relationship.

Actually to prevent this prat from annoying me further I think it'll be a good idea to PM you. PM me any questions you have OP. Feel free.

Reply 15

fat_hobbit

2

Anonymous

(Please do not de-anon as my boyf uses this site)

I have been going out with my boyf (who is white) for over a year and a half now. However, lately I can't stop thinking about Asian guys. I feel terribly guilty about this and not sure whether or not it is racist(?). Whenever I am out with friends I always try to make contact with the Asian guys, although I don't think I would ever cheat on him. Please help as I'm not sure what to do :frown:

Are you blond by any chance?

I tend to find that blond girls are more likely go for me when it comes to girls of your race.

I reckon it is because it opposites attract. I am tall and dark, whereas she is the complete opposite.

Reply 16

aster100

Calm down dude; of course it's a list of stereotypes; what else could it be. I am half asian myself so I would know all about them, but this is not some racist attack on anyone, I'm just trying my best to help the OP. If you looked and read her replies, she wants to be dissuaded. And when did I say Asians should be avoided???? Seriously stop trying to undermine me when I'm trying to help the OP. I don't even know why you're trying to destabilise everything I say when you're not even helping. What are you trying to achieve?

I just thought the whole list idea is inappropriate. By the way, i am quite calm. Also i have not said that you are engaging in some kind of racist attack, maybe it is you that should calm down.

My point is that, if i say "i am having some strange attraction to blonde haired women" and then you make a "list" saying "blonde haired women are stupid, they use men, they will never be faithful, they cannot hold a conversation etc etc, although you may have dissuaded me from going after a blonde, you have also spread misinformation and perpetuated a stereotype. I do not think this is helpful.

If the girl likes asian men so much that she can't help herself and can't be faithful to her boyfriend, then maybe she is with the wrong man. By dissuading her in such a manner, i feel you are postponing the inevitable and simply acting irresponsibly. Why can you not highlight her boyfriends best features rather than write a list designed to put people off an entire race.

Reply 17

aster100

Actually to prevent this prat from annoying me further I think it'll be a good idea to PM you. PM me any questions you have OP. Feel free.

Can you not cope with criticism or dissent? I think you are over-sensitive and immature. Do you call everybody that disagrees with you a prat?

Reply 18

TeamBlueGravy

12

Anonymous

(Please do not de-anon as my boyf uses this site)

I have been going out with my boyf (who is white) for over a year and a half now. However, lately I can't stop thinking about Asian guys. I feel terribly guilty about this and not sure whether or not it is racist(?). Whenever I am out with friends I always try to make contact with the Asian guys, although I don't think I would ever cheat on him. Please help as I'm not sure what to do :frown:

To put it simply if you were attracted much more, to someonoe other than your boyfriend, you would break you with him and go for the one you like more??!

Its the same thing, just b'cas you like asians makes no difference... and you are not racist, thats stupid!

p.s I'm indian, the perfect tanned shade of brown. :biggrin:

and really athletic (stop drolling on your keyboard, it'll break) LOL KAm.

Reply 19