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Leeleecxx
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Cut a long story short , broke up with my ex beginning of September, it was a bad break up I lost my job and lied to him about it ! I didn’t want to tell him until I was ready but he found this out by coming to my house and sitting and waiting to see if I leave ! Obviously I was upset over this and the argument was bad ! I became worried because we was together 5 months I wanted to know if he was the dangerous type because he had guns ! I contacted his ex she asked to meet me I did she told me she wouldn’t think he was a danger to me which put me at ease they have kids together she asked he if was ever horrible to there children I said no ! She promised she wouldn’t tell him about us meeting but she did ! She told him if he ever sees me again she will stop him seeing the kids ! Which is unfair! It hurt me because I only wanted to know if my ex was capable of doing something to me because I have children . Things got worse now he hates me so much and blocked me on everything, thing is I can’t stop thinking about him I love him still , we was good together I saw a future he told me he was in love with me and before it ended he said he loves me but hates me at the same time , I did a silly thing I saw a women following him on Instagram I contacted her and obviously she told him he texted calling me phycho now I feel like an absolute fool I’m ashamed of myself he blocked me after . I really want to talk to him for closure I don’t like ending things on bad terms and I do love him so much I cry most days I miss the connection we had . I thought about writing him a letter I don’t know if I should ! What should I do
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Pipskweak
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(Original post by Leeleecxx)
Cut a long story short , broke up with my ex beginning of September, it was a bad break up I lost my job and lied to him about it ! I didn’t want to tell him until I was ready but he found this out by coming to my house and sitting and waiting to see if I leave ! Obviously I was upset over this and the argument was bad ! I became worried because we was together 5 months I wanted to know if he was the dangerous type because he had guns ! I contacted his ex she asked to meet me I did she told me she wouldn’t think he was a danger to me which put me at ease they have kids together she asked he if was ever horrible to there children I said no ! She promised she wouldn’t tell him about us meeting but she did ! She told him if he ever sees me again she will stop him seeing the kids ! Which is unfair! It hurt me because I only wanted to know if my ex was capable of doing something to me because I have children . Things got worse now he hates me so much and blocked me on everything, thing is I can’t stop thinking about him I love him still , we was good together I saw a future he told me he was in love with me and before it ended he said he loves me but hates me at the same time , I did a silly thing I saw a women following him on Instagram I contacted her and obviously she told him he texted calling me phycho now I feel like an absolute fool I’m ashamed of myself he blocked me after . I really want to talk to him for closure I don’t like ending things on bad terms and I do love him so much I cry most days I miss the connection we had . I thought about writing him a letter I don’t know if I should ! What should I do
Walk away sugar, I know it's so difficult and can feel like you're never going to recover from how you're feeling right now, but this all sounds a little bit messy. We all have somebody that we struggle to get over, but chasing something that is not going to happen will hurt more and for longer. It sounds like it is toxic from both sides, with him waiting outside your house to see if you left for work, and you messaging people that you are not directly involved with.
You need some time to yourself without the drama. You might find that you'll feel like a weight is lifted off your shoulders without the unnecessary extra stress that this is causing. Make your own closure, because unfortunately you can not always rely on others to give it to you - you tried, it was probably good for a while, but things went sour and now you are independent again. If you feel the need to write a letter - do it, but don't send it. Instead take it out the back garden and (safely) burn it or rip it into a million pieces. Allow yourself time to cry, it's ok! Try to remember WHY you split when you're missing him too much and reaffirm that you are doing better each day that goes past and you're surviving just fine without him.
As sad as it is, people come and go in our lives, but the best thing you can do is look forward and focus on YOU and what you want to achieve
Best of luck x
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