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Am I a stalker? I think there’s something wrong with me...

Basically about 4 years ago I realised I liked a girl in my class and the fact that I like girls as well as boys is something I am still coming to terms with and I’m not sure about my sexuality still. However I suppressed that I liked this girl for 2 years including to my own friends who I did not tell until we left school. I hated school so much and was incredibly unhappy and put down my crush on this girl as just confusion or needing a distraction from everything. However I feel great shame, sadness and guilt nearly 3 years later because I exposed to her the worst side of myself I have ever been and it saddens me to this day that she never even liked me. I was that awkward weird ugly friend who was just generally disgusting to look at with a weird bad personality. I am now happy in myself but those memories haunt me especially the fact that this is how she will forever remember me by and the fact that I couldn’t make a better impression...perhaps the fact that she didn’t like me and could never like me. To this day I have never forgotten her and have no idea why this hasn’t left me. I give into temptation sometimes and stalk her social media accounts and wish I could have been even at least her friend. I am so confused why I do this and feel like I am a creep especially considering she never found out that I liked her and thought I was a weirdo. Please help me I have no idea what to think. She has not left my head since and it has been nearly 3 years. Is this normal?
You need to move on. Your obsession with her is mainly due to the fact that you can't accept the past. You can't change anything. It hurts and I know you want to keep obsessing over what you could've done differently, but there's no use in it. You can't go back. You need to live your life in the moment instead of imagining what life could've been like if you had done something differently.

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