Ex boyfriend ruined my life Watch

Fiona143
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#1
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I found out for the whole 2 years of our relationship my ex was using me for sex and company to fill the pain of his first ex that broke his heart. He was very controlling and emotionally abusive and always insulted me. When I finally broke up with him he was so angry he humiliated me and sent my nudes to my house (my brother saw them). What hurts the most isn’t even how badly he degraded me, but the fact that he saw me every single day for 2 years and I meant nothing to him because his heart still longed for his ex. I reported him for revenge porn.

I found out he’s very damaged inside as he wasn’t loved in his childhood and then his first love cheated on him and broke his heart. Since then he’s been abusive to all his other ex’s and I was next. It’s been 8 months now and I’ve tried so hard to move on but I’m depressed. Part of me wants him back just so he can fix me now that he’s broken me. The last time I saw him when we were still together he told me he wanted to change by going to therapy and praying and getting a job. But at that time I’d given up hope of him ever changing. It was only later I found out about his past and now I realise these changes would have helped him overcome all this emotional damage. I feel like going back to him to try and help him change but he’s done me so dirty and I doubt he even had true feelings for me.
Last edited by Fiona143; 3 weeks ago
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Sammylou40
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It seems that you used him in the beginning too. And it’s not helpful to pull the other girl down by comparing looks. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!
That’s said you need to find a way to move on. It’s done and you both played a part in that.
Get out and about with your friends, take up new hobbies and meet new people. In time you will heal
And hopefully, lesson learned. Nudes are NEVER a good idea.
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Fiona143
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(Original post by zedius)
its people like you that ruin guys lives, claiming rape when you even said you slept with him because of his looks.

'(I’m way prettier than her wtf)'.

imo you deserve it.
Wow insensitive much. I never claimed rape I said that's how I'm left feeling because of how he used me
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Fiona143)
Wow insensitive much. I never claimed rape I said that's how I'm left feeling because of how he used me
Try and look at it as a lesson...and need to learn from it rather than making the same mistakes again.

Dont go back to him ... and never let someone else have nudes of you
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Plantagenet Crown
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Are you crazy? How could you even think of going back to him? Accept it’s over and that he’s severely damaged and manipulative. You’ve dodged a bullet.
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Welshvisitor
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Ok he broke the law with sending nudes. It’s an imprisonable offence now. Seriously. You can go to the police. https://www.lawtonslaw.co.uk/resourc...enge-porn-law/

You can get justice
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Fiona143
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(Original post by zedius)
initially i wished death but thats saved for pedophiles.

listen you cant feel like you been raped 2 years ago when you've consented. you might feel used but dont use rape if you havent said no during intercourse or taken advantage of(in bed)
learn the ****ing term before you spout it out ffs.
You're right I shouldn't have used that term, I've taken it out
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poohplop
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(Original post by Fiona143)
Sorry this is going to be long. I stupidly lost my virginity to him (not because I was in love but because he was super good looking and I was so carefree at the time). But I found out for the whole 2 years of our relationship he was using me for sex and company to fill the pain of his first ex that broke his heart. When I broke up with him he called me his leftovers and told me his plan is to sleep around but ultimately marry a virgin. I trusted him but I found out the whole time he was telling his friends details of our sex life. To make things worse he catfished me too as he’d been lying about his age and a lot of other things. Our relationship was always going south because he never trusted me and insulted me all the time yet expected me to show him unconditional love. Towards the end I stopped having sex with him and then he started talking to other girls behind my back, although I don't think he cheated on me but I can't be sure. To top it off when I finally broke up with him he was so angry he humiliated me and sent nudes to my house (my brother saw them). I can’t put into words how I feel other than I would just rather be dead because my heart’s in too much pain. What hurts the most isn’t even how badly he degraded me, but the fact that he saw me every single day for 2 years and I meant nothing to him because his heart still longed for his ex. I just can’t come to terms with this because I never once felt like I was being used as he was giving me so much time and attention and he put in effort whenever i complained about things and he begged me not to leave him whenever I tried.

I found out he’s very damaged inside as he wasn’t loved in his childhood and then his first love cheated on him and broke his heart. Since then he’s been emotionally abusive to all his other ex’s and I was next. I guess I always knew he wasn’t marriage material because he’s a typical bad boy, he had no work ethic, no respect for women, and his temper scared me. It’s been 8 months now and I’ve tried so hard to move on but I’m depressed. Part of me wants him back just so he can fix me now that he’s broken me. The last time I saw him when we were still together he told me he wanted to start praying, going to therapy, and to excel at his job and wanted me to show him more love (which i didn’t do much because he was always insulting me). But at that time I’d given up hope of him ever changing. It was only later I found out about his past and now I realise these changes would have helped him overcome all this emotional damage. I feel like going back to him to try and help him change but he’s done me so dirty and I doubt he even had true feelings for me.
xDD
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Welshvisitor
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https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.h...-online-198122
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davesantana
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(Original post by Fiona143)
You're right I shouldn't have used that term, I've taken it out
fam, havent been this vexed in forever.

anyway, ye hes a **** for suing you. you shouldve seen it coming tbh. if he used other girls shouldnt he have had a fboy reputation floating around.
well as hurt as you may be this is experience en and you'll never(hopefully) experience any of these fboys.

my theory is usually guys only cuss out a girl if they were rejected or dumped. only in defense and try make them feel bad because they also do.
usuallyguys who sleep around dont get attached so 2 years, he mustve had somefeelings i guess. but yk his relationship in the past must've been holding him back. you should work on yourself, get over him. lifes too short for worrying about guys/girls. unless you wanna be like him, damaged from his ex years ago. you got this
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ساره
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wow he sounds very manipulative. I've always learn't that you can never change them unless they want to change
Last edited by ساره; 3 weeks ago
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londonmyst
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You are well rid of him.
Imagine how awful life with be for the poor girl who ends up married to him or any children who have to depend upon him.
Leaking nudes is illegal, if you want to report the ex police will arrest and if he's found guilty he'll end up with a criminal conviction.

Don't allow the ex to ruin your self esteem or attitude towards men.
Every relationship provides valuable life experience that you will learn from.
Ex boyfriends, ons, friendships.
Shows you the warning signs in a bf, things you must never tolerate in a relationship and how to avoid a selfish hot guy.
I've been there too.
Life will get better, you will move on past the relationship and the ex will receive full repayment of his karmic overdraft.
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Fiona143
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(Original post by londonmyst)
You are well rid of him.
Imagine how awful life with be for the poor girl who ends up married to him or any children who have to depend upon him.
Leaking nudes is illegal, if you want to report the ex police will arrest and if he's found guilty he'll end up with a criminal conviction.

Don't allow the ex to ruin your self esteem or attitude towards men.
Every relationship provides valuable life experience that you will learn from.
Ex boyfriends, ons, friendships.
Shows you the warning signs in a bf, things you must never tolerate in a relationship and how to avoid a selfish hot guy.
I've been there too.
Life will get better, you will move on past the relationship and the ex will receive full repayment of his karmic overdraft.
I actually did end up reporting him for that and I should have mentioned he's in prison now. It still doesn't change the emotional trauma though, thank you you're right
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Surnia
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(Original post by Fiona143)
I found out for the whole 2 years of our relationship my ex was using me for sex and company to fill the pain of his first ex that broke his heart. He was very controlling and emotionally abusive and always insulted me. When I finally broke up with him he was so angry he humiliated me and sent my nudes to my house (my brother saw them). What hurts the most isn’t even how badly he degraded me, but the fact that he saw me every single day for 2 years and I meant nothing to him because his heart still longed for his ex. I reported him for revenge porn.

I found out he’s very damaged inside as he wasn’t loved in his childhood and then his first love cheated on him and broke his heart. Since then he’s been abusive to all his other ex’s and I was next. It’s been 8 months now and I’ve tried so hard to move on but I’m depressed. Part of me wants him back just so he can fix me now that he’s broken me. The last time I saw him when we were still together he told me he wanted to change by going to therapy and praying and getting a job. But at that time I’d given up hope of him ever changing. It was only later I found out about his past and now I realise these changes would have helped him overcome all this emotional damage. I feel like going back to him to try and help him change but he’s done me so dirty and I doubt he even had true feelings for me.
Where did you get the bit about his damaged childhood and getting his heart broken? If it was from him, it sounds like he's spinning a line. Other people have sad upbringings and broken hearts and don't behave like this. Same as telling you about therapy and getting a job; had you said or even hinted to him about things like this, so he's parroting them back? For 2 years he had you as a compliant girlfriend who slept with him, and he comes over as saying what you want to hear to keep you around. Actions speak louder than words and he won't fix you, he'll continue to break you. If he wants to change, he must do it; don't think you can be there as an emotional crutch. If a female friend was telling you this same story about her boyfriend, what would your advice be? I'm sure you wouldn't want to see her hurt again, so take that same advice.

You had the courage to report him for revenge porn. Dig deep and find that quality again to move away from this guy, and block him on anything he may use to contact you in future. You are worth more.
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