My bf kicked my hand. Was it a joke? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 1 month ago
#1
Hello.

I want to ask you guys for your opinion.
I've been in relationship with my boyfriend from over a year. He is nervous type. He often critisized me and I felt everything I do is pissing him off. That I walk in a bad way. That I eat in a bad way. That I take wrong towel and so on.

One month ago I talked about it with him and I really saw a change. Although for me it's sad that he admits that with me he has to keep his nerves aside. This basically means that I'm annoying for him. He even said it's difficult for him to stay calm when he has a little cow next to him (because he claims when I eat I don't close my mouth)...

Today he was tired, nervous. I do hybrid nails and I have this thing that I touch them, I scrape them and I can't control it, I even don't know when I do it. He told me I'm losing my money like this because I'm wasting those nails I've paid for (which is not true, I'm not taking my nail polish off, Im just touching the back of the nail). He has been telling me to leave those nails, he gived me a snack with this hands on my hand. Yesterday we were walking home and suddenly he kicked my hand with his shoe... It hurted me, I felt so bad I started to cry. He was surprised I was crying. He gave me a hug but didnt say sorry. Then he was mad at me that I was silent.

Today he told me I should stop touching my face because I have pimples from it ( This is not true, I'm suffering from illness that giving me pimples but I'm fighting with it and my face is really okay for me).

Please help. What do you think about it? I presented only bad sides of him but he really has good feautures, he is loyal and caring. Sometimes I feel like a trash tho. Thank you <3
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YaliaV
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Far too much hassle and he seems controlling. He would irritate the life out of me. Now he has started to get violent and it could escalate. Do you really need any more red flags?
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Anonymous #2
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Couples do have things they sometimes find annoying about each other, but to me it sounds hes being over the top and it seems odd that he finds almost everything you do annoying especially something as small as touching your face.
The fact he actually kicked you and resorted to violence seems a bit of a red flag.
To be straight up it also sounds as though he perhaps has some mental condition if he has nerve problems and always feels annoyed.
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HoldThisL
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(Original post by Anonymous)
He often critisized me and I felt everything I do is pissing him off. That I walk in a bad way. That I eat in a bad way. That I take wrong towel and so on.
i stopped reading here because your boyfriend sounds like an ass

if one of my friends told me i walk weirdly on a regular basis i'd tell them to **** off lmao, never mind a girlfriend
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by HoldThisL)
i stopped reading here because your boyfriend sounds like an ass

if one of my friends told me i walk weirdly on a regular basis i'd tell them to **** off lmao, never mind a girlfriend
He told me I walk and sit like a Quasimodo ... I told him it hurted me and then he told me first it was a joke and then he got angry because he claims he just wants me to walk straight for my straight back ... Also he had problem with me eating without my elbows on the table.

Small things but they pop up here and there.
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HoldThisL
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(Original post by Anonymous)
He told me I walk and sit like a Quasimodo ... I told him it hurted me and then he told me first it was a joke and then he got angry because he claims he just wants me to walk straight for my straight back ... Also he had problem with me eating without my elbows on the table.

Small things but they pop up here and there.
get someone who can chill
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ughhhhhfam
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hello.

I want to ask you guys for your opinion.
I've been in relationship with my boyfriend from over a year. He is nervous type. He often critisized me and I felt everything I do is pissing him off. That I walk in a bad way. That I eat in a bad way. That I take wrong towel and so on.

One month ago I talked about it with him and I really saw a change. Although for me it's sad that he admits that with me he has to keep his nerves aside. This basically means that I'm annoying for him. He even said it's difficult for him to stay calm when he has a little cow next to him (because he claims when I eat I don't close my mouth)...

Today he was tired, nervous. I do hybrid nails and I have this thing that I touch them, I scrape them and I can't control it, I even don't know when I do it. He told me I'm losing my money like this because I'm wasting those nails I've paid for (which is not true, I'm not taking my nail polish off, Im just touching the back of the nail). He has been telling me to leave those nails, he gived me a snack with this hands on my hand. Yesterday we were walking home and suddenly he kicked my hand with his shoe... It hurted me, I felt so bad I started to cry. He was surprised I was crying. He gave me a hug but didnt say sorry. Then he was mad at me that I was silent.

Today he told me I should stop touching my face because I have pimples from it ( This is not true, I'm suffering from illness that giving me pimples but I'm fighting with it and my face is really okay for me).

Please help. What do you think about it? I presented only bad sides of him but he really has good feautures, he is loyal and caring. Sometimes I feel like a trash tho. Thank you <3
Break up with him. Please.
Everything you said about him is concerning. He's managed to make you feel bad for absolutely nothing which is really sad to read and he controls your actions. Note that this will very likely get worse as time goes on.
His actions are not what a relationship is supposed to be about. His 'good' points mean nothing when the negatives severely outweigh them and in his case, they do. You deserve someone who will make you feel loved and make you feel good about yourself.
Leave the relationship while you can.
Wishing you the best xx
Last edited by ughhhhhfam; 1 month ago
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#Broken#Unloved
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(Original post by ughhhhhfam)
Break up with him. Please.
Everything you said about him is concerning. He's managed to make you feel bad for absolutely nothing which is really sad to read and he controls your actions. Note that this will very likely get worse as time goes on.
His actions are not what a relationship is supposed to be about. His 'good' points mean nothing when the negatives severely outweigh them and in his case, they do. You deserve someone who will make you feel loved and make you feel good about yourself.
Leave the relationship while you can.
Wishing you the best xx
I agree......
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Anonymous #3
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he is being horrible to you, even if he had any constructive feedback regarding anything at all, the way he said all of it is so unpleasant it shows he does not care for your feelings and does not respect you as a person. His behaviour cannot improve naturally, it can only get worse. look after yourself because he won't
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Retired_Messiah
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As far as red flags go this is an entire weavery's worth, love. You need to get out of there.
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Anonymous #4
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#11
Hey there, I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

I can see everyone is telling you to get out, and it mustn't be easy to hear this.

The truth is that just because someone is unwell, be it physically or emotionally, it does not grant them a free pass to treat others poorly. Be it someone as distant or close.

You should value yourself higher and tolerate being treated like this, no matter how much you love another individual. You must love yourself first.
The negatives trump any good aspects of him. I believe that the actions you have described fall within the jurisdiction of domestic abuse.

Take care of yourself, please.
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Anonymous #4
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Also, you may want to find someone to talk to. It sounds like you're carrying a lot on your shoulders. Be it a therapist or a good friend. Even the internet. Vent.
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MidgetFever
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...
I'm sorry for focusing on this point but am I the only one impressed that he managed to kick your hand whilst walking? That must have been some full roundhouse **** for it to be possible.

Anyway, on a serious note he sounds extremely controlling and just not a nice person in general. It's probably best to call it quits before he gets even more manipulative.
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black tea
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I would strongly advise breaking up with this person, regardless of how strong your feelings are for him. Everything about this rings alarm bells. He will not change, he will only get worse the longer you are together. Please look after yourself.
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tamil fever
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you feel like trash? Darling...he's the trash. You need to leave him asap. As soon as he started criticising you that should have been the biggest red flag.
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bones-mccoy
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He's horrible. I know you love him but he has no respect for you. He may have his good points, everyone does, but if he's making you feel that bad you need to leave him.
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Anonymous #5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Hey there, I'm sorry to hear about your situation.

I can see everyone is telling you to get out, and it mustn't be easy to hear this.

The truth is that just because someone is unwell, be it physically or emotionally, it does not grant them a free pass to treat others poorly. Be it someone as distant or close.

You should value yourself higher and tolerate being treated like this, no matter how much you love another individual. You must love yourself first.
The negatives trump any good aspects of him. I believe that the actions you have described fall within the jurisdiction of domestic abuse.

Take care of yourself, please.
Yes this is 100% right ,, the guy also sounds like he really has some issues to sort through of his own, from personal experience I know that people in relationships with those mentally ill or struggling for prolonged periods can be really hard as you also can feel personally responsible for taking care of this person , but babe like this is 100% wrong and as said above you really have to prioritise yourself here and get out - this guy is ripping apart your self confidence and worth and you really deserve better .. he sounds genuinely abusive - stay safe I wish you all the best xx
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Glaz
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He's controlling and manipulative and violent, get away from him.
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sinfonietta
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There isn't anything positive you could say about this guy that would be able to balance out his negatives.

Find someone who actually likes you as you are rather than simply tolerating you.
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Dunnig Kruger
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Dump this neurotic, intolerant, bullying, controlling, overly critical, violent, unapologetic, selfish, bad tempered, horrible little man ASAP!

All he's doing is undermining your self esteem at every opportunity.

Edit: It's a weird kind of loyalty and caring when he boots your hand! And keeps having a go at you over triffling details.
I bet he's loyal and caring when you're doing EXACTLY what he wants?
And when you're not, he can't cope with it.
Someone that's really loyal and caring would tolerate your little ways.
He doesn't want a girlfriend, he wants a puppet!
Last edited by Dunnig Kruger; 1 month ago
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