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Audrey Hepburn
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#1
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I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.
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generalebriety
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Surely going to Oxford is part of your personality? You're intelligent, dedicated, hard-working and academic, and the fact that you're going to Oxford is proof of that. If that's all people ever talk about about you, then fair enough, but if it's just mentioned, who cares? You could say it about any other aspect of your personality that you're introduced to people with - that you're a keen badminton player, someone-or-other's friend from school, can juggle six balls with one hand, or whatever, are all part of you.
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F1 fanatic
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#3
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(Original post by Audrey Hepburn)
I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.
Yeah, I think a lot of people do react in this way, but neither should you feel a need to lie or hide things about yourself. So long as you're not pushing it in people's faces or trying to show off, which it doesn't sound like you are, then you have nothing to worry about. Oxford has a reputation, and for a lot of people it does produce a wow factor. Interestingly, and pertinent to you I've always found that saying I do physics produces a worse reaction than saying I go to Oxford.
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Audrey Hepburn
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(Original post by generalebriety)
Surely going to Oxford is part of your personality? You're intelligent, dedicated, hard-working and academic, and the fact that you're going to Oxford is proof of that. If that's all people ever talk about about you, then fair enough, but if it's just mentioned, who cares? You could say it about any other aspect of your personality that you're introduced to people with - that you're a keen badminton player, someone-or-other's friend from school, can juggle six balls with one hand, or whatever, are all part of you.
:rofl:

one out of four isn't bad...

I do see your point though, I'd just rather that people judged me before they knew that I'm clever, it does make them see me differently. I mean, I do have other achievements too.
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Audrey Hepburn
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(Original post by F1 fanatic)
Yeah, I think a lot of people do react in this way, but neither should you feel a need to lie or hide things about yourself. So long as you're not pushing it in people's faces or trying to show off, which it doesn't sound like you are, then you have nothing to worry about. Oxford has a reputation, and for a lot of people it does produce a wow factor. Interestingly, and pertinent to you I've always found that saying I do physics produces a worse reaction than saying I go to Oxford.
When people ask me what subject, I say Philosophy and Physics. :ninja:

:cool:
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Swayum
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I haven't got an offer from Oxbridge but I still know exactly what you mean. If I make the mistake of telling someone I do Further Maths, they freak out (so I tell most people I do just Maths A-level, I usually miss out the Further part). If I tell someone I'm doing Maths at university, they look at me like I'm crazy and say something like "Wow, I was never good at Maths, you must be so good blah blah blah". Even if I say "Yeah I've got an offer from Warwick" they're still pretty stunned.

I find hairdressers are usually most interested in this sort of information.
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*pitseleh*
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Gosh, yes. I seem to remember another thread along these lines a while back - you're definitely not alone in feeling like this.

The nature of my work means that I work with a different set of people almost every shift.. which means I'm going through the introduction procedure all the time. I always try to avoid saying where I'll hopefully be going to uni, and instead I just talk about my subject and the possibility of teaching, when asked about future plans. However, some people ask outright where I'm going, and the reactions do tend to make me feel quite uncomfortable. I've taken to saying things like "they felt sorry for me" or "their standards are slipping!" or "I'm the token Welsh person" etc, to make light of it.

I seem to remember hobnob advising me to move the conversation on once you've said where you're going to uni - don't just say "Oxford" and leave it hanging in the air. I've found it makes things a lot less awkward, if you do that.
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martin101
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Dont worry youre not alone. There isnt much you can do about it really. Its even worse for me being a medic because once they hear it, they instantly assume Im a doctor!
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faber niger
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(Original post by Swayum)
I find hairdressers are usually most interested in this sort of information.
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Greatleysteg
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#10
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(Original post by Audrey Hepburn)
I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.

I get exactly the same thing, all the time.

Don't let it bother you - even if you hadn't got into Oxford, it'd come across in who you are, that you'd be Oxford-worthy. That you'll be going there is just a seal of approval, if you will. What I'm saying is, people wouldn't treat you all that differently if they didn't know, they just, as can be expected, are impressed at the mention of the word.

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sporkonator
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We all have our crosses to bear.
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matthew_mi
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#12
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(Original post by Audrey Hepburn)
I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.
Well...i really don't agree with you on that from my point of view. First Oxford is Oxford and it really can't be compared to some ordinary unis in respect to its name recognition. If you say not so, then you are either over-modest or you are being sarcastic. (in the US, there are kids who would say I go to a small private college near Boston..probably you have never heard of it (meaning Harvard) or similar stuff for Yale,Princeton etc. )
Secondly, if people over-react, that is just normal. It can never go over your personality. Your job, school etc. would get you into the conversation, it may give a WOW factor and that is good. If you are born to be the star of long formal conversations, it is again just your personality that would get you there. Such factual info would just open the door and get some attention over you. I have studied in a super prestigious magnet highschool in my state and it was just the same. Now they ask where do I head up to and when I say Oxford, they just give the same WOW. Good Luck with it! =))
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OxyMoron.
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#13
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(Original post by Swayum)
I haven't got an offer from Oxbridge but I still know exactly what you mean. If I make the mistake of telling someone I do Further Maths, they freak out (so I tell most people I do just Maths A-level, I usually miss out the Further part). If I tell someone I'm doing Maths at university, they look at me like I'm crazy and say something like "Wow, I was never good at Maths, you must be so good blah blah blah". Even if I say "Yeah I've got an offer from Warwick" they're still pretty stunned.

I find hairdressers are usually most interested in this sort of information.
That would be entirely correct. My hairdresser was very pleased to hear that I'd got in and that one of her cousins was going there as well to do Media and Communications...
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RawJoh1
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(Original post by Audrey Hepburn)
I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.
I only told close friends that I was going to Oxford. If a randomer in a bar asked, I said I was off to Sheffield.

Didn't do me any harm, and avoids the whole "wow, you must be really clever!" silliness.
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marshmallow_mayhem
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It happened a lot during the last few months at school- teachers wanting to show off on open day, it gets seriously awkward but I managed to hide most of the time when someone was being shown round. I've only told my family and friends, otherwise, and my parents have kept it quiet so far because they don't want to be seen as showing off and also, if I don't make the grades, it'd be pretty embarrassing! I think you're right and wish that people won't make such a big deal out of it.
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Quistis
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(Original post by OxyMoron.)
That would be entirely correct. My hairdresser was very pleased to hear that I'd got in and that one of her cousins was going there as well to do Media and Communications...
WhenI told my hairdresser I was studying Medicine at Oxford, she asked: "Oh, didn't you get into any universities closer to home?"

Later, she said, "My daughter's at Edge Hill. Why didn't you go there? I hear it's good for Law. Did you not get in?"

This is why I hate going to the hairdresser's.
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The_Lonely_Goatherd
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#17
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(Original post by Audrey Hepburn)
I'm starting Oxford in October and ever since I got accepted I've found that whenever I get introduced to someone new it gets mentioned within at least two minutes! I didn't mind at first because I was rather proud of myself, but now that I've realized that Oxford really is 'just another university' and that it's not that big a deal, it's getting rather frustrating. I just feel like I'm being judged on the fact that I got into a good university rather than my actual personality, am I right to find this annoying?

Does anyone else get this - and dislike it? Does it still happen to current students too? I'm rather tempted to tell people that I'm going to get a degree from McDonalds instead just to get some peace.
I get it all the time when I go out with my family and conversations with my secondary school friends' new friends (and sometimes with people on TSR!) usually die out when people find out which uni I'm at.

People are likely to judge you on the fact you're going to Oxford, but this is the price we pay for being accepted by one of the world's best unis Don't let it drag you down or make you feel uncomfortable. Getting into Oxford IS a big deal: loads of people get rejected every year, but they picked YOU! You should be proud of this!

The best thing to do in these situations is quickly say something to avoid/defuse the inevitable instant awe/jealousy/etc. that will arise once people know where you're going. There was a thread with suggestions a while back. Personally, when people say to me "Oh my god, you're at OXFORD!"/"You mean Brookes?"/"Oh" *silence*, I tell people I'm the token Asian in my Faculty :eek: :rolleyes: It usually works
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North
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i just say I'm going down south and then everyone forgets to ask me what uni I'm going to and ****s of the english/gets offended that I'm leaving scotland
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Rudrax
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#19
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(The Cambridge don't have a thread like this so I'm intruding :p:)

My experience is slightly different, when I told family and friends I'd got an offer from Cambridge, their first response was "Why didn't you apply to Oxford?"
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sporkonator
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(Original post by Rudrax)
(The Cambridge don't have a thread like this so I'm intruding :p:)

My experience is slightly different, when I told family and friends I'd got an offer from Cambridge, their first response was "Why didn't you apply to Oxford?"
So...why didn't you?

I kid
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