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ex boyfriend

I'm in a right pickle. Basically, me and my ex boyfriend broke up October 2006 because we moved to uni, the distance was the main reason given but basically I didn't want the relationship, and he was effectively a rebound (sounds terrible i know). We tried to be friends but given that he still liked me it was impossible, with him getting jealous at everything, me responding badly and him saying extremely hurtful things. In the end I sent him an email saying we needed to have a break from each other and not speak in order to salvage what little friendship we had left; i'd had enough (this was August 2007). We haven't spoken since then, and I started going out with an amazing guy in November 2007 - one who unfortunately lives in Scotland. Since not speaking to my ex it has been extremely difficult to see my friends as we were all part of the same friendship group and he still (to this day) bitches about me none stop to all of our friends. One of my best friends organised a BBQ for his birthday and invited me, my ex and unfortunately my current boyfriend as he's going to be down for that weekend. The response i found on facebook from my ex on my friends wall was extremely hurtful, along the lines of 'why do you invite my bitch of an ex girlfriend'. Basically, i have no idea what to do, i'm trying to be the mature one here but how do i stop him saying such things about me, or get to see my friends ever? I don't have a large amount of friends, and this year has been extremely difficult for me at uni and health wise. I wish he'd just grow up and see that the world doesn't centre around the fact that he got hurt over a year and a half ago.

Any helpful ideas?

OP

anyone...?

talk to him, ask why he's going around saying nasty things because, to be fair, you haven't done anything wrong.
and if you and him are both going to the BBQ, make sure you've sorted things before then, you don't want to have an argument on the day and ruin your friends birthday.
:smile:

Reply 3

BeautifullyTragic

13

Maybe he got annoyed that you suggested you broke contact, and his way of dealing with it is to bitch about you. He's still not over you.

Obviously I don't know you or how you were with each other so that's only a suggestion, but it's a possibility.

Reply 4

Y'anami!

12

He shouldn't be stopping you from seeing your friends, that's ridiculous and he should know that. You should talk to him and let him know that you have the right to see your friends.. in peace.

Reply 5

Sickminded

I dont think the whole story is bein told here...

Reply 6

pendragon

13

Be rude and assertive back; stand up for yourself. You've given him enough time to get over it. Would your new bf be ok physically if your ex attacked him? I'd go along with the new guy if I was you. Tell him to F off.

Reply 7

freakin88

He's the one making an ass out of himself, all you can do is put it past you. Perhaps let him know he is being impossible before you do that. I think your friends can tell that he's being a jerk when he says stuff like that and wouldn't hold it against you, they shouldn't anyway.

Reply 8

DeepStar

17

Sickminded

I dont think the whole story is bein told here...

Hmm something does sound missing!

Ok guys can be a pain after breaking up but this seems to be more than that, if you didnt give him a reason (although most dont need one) to act like a snob then go talk to him directly and ask him why he is saying all those things!

Personally I would just ignore, let him bark until he stops and go out with friends as if nothing has happened!

Reply 9

Sickminded

DeepStar

Hmm something does sound missing!

Ok guys can be a pain after breaking up but this seems to be more than that, if you didnt give him a reason (although most dont need one) to act like a snob then go talk to him directly and ask him why he is saying all those things!

Personally I would just ignore, let him bark until he stops and go out with friends as if nothing has happened!

if he wants to be a betty talks alot, let him...
guys who run their mouths bitching to other people are too dramatic to begin with :rolleyes:

go and hang with your friends, wear somethin hot n sexy, then send me pictures :biggrin:

Reply 10

k0932741

OP

1

ah unfortunately i can't hang out with my friends if he's there, i have to organise alternative meet ups - it's really not worth the effort of having to deal with abuse being thrown at me. It seems like a completely impossible situation to rectify. The BBQ got cancelled because he was being extremely immature on facebook and my friend got sick of it, so at least i don't have to worry about that...

Reply 11

Sickminded

pinkaliengoo

ah unfortunately i can't hang out with my friends if he's there, i have to organise alternative meet ups - it's really not worth the effort of having to deal with abuse being thrown at me. It seems like a completely impossible situation to rectify. The BBQ got cancelled because he was being extremely immature on facebook and my friend got sick of it, so at least i don't have to worry about that...