Is dating a 31 year old as a 19 y/o weird?

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actualpidgeholt
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I'm 19 and I met this guy online. We've gone on a few dates and my friend says it's creepy for him to be dating me because he's 31. Is my friend right? He seems like a genuinely good guy.
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Appirition
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Imo saying it's 'creepy' purely based on age gap is unfair. Age gaps of more than roughly 5 years are less common, and that's often because we tend to mix and socialise with people around our own age, but with more and more people using Internet dating sites and apps, larger age gap relationships are more common than they used to be.
If you like the guy and he treats you right, go for it and see what happens between you, but don't rush into anything and don't let yourself feel pressured into anything that you're not 100% happy and comfortable with.
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Yukikobestgirl
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it's a little weird a 12 year age gap is ****ing huge.
It's not illegal and he could be genuine but obviously be cautious.
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ANM775
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(Original post by actualpidgeholt)
I'm 19 and I met this guy online. We've gone on a few dates and my friend says it's creepy for him to be dating me because he's 31. Is my friend right? He seems like a genuinely good guy.

Wouldn't say it was weird, but I would say in this country it's not really too politically correct

What's politically correct in this country is a 31 year old man dating another 31 year old man,



The age men find women most attractive is actually 20:

https://i2.wp.com/metro.co.uk/wp-con...40%2C503&ssl=1

https://metro.co.uk/2019/02/22/men-r...y-20s-8718590/

so hardly surprising that this 31 year old man is attracted to you considering you're 19. It's just that society doesn't like it. but it's far more normal for him to be attracted to you than for him to be attracted to a 31 year old man [which society likes and approves of]
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the bear
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19 is the age of peak fertility in our species ? you will be attractive to a wide range of males.
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Drewski
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Unusual? Sure.
Weird? Not necessarily.

I've been there myself, it's only weird if you let it be.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by actualpidgeholt)
I'm 19 and I met this guy online. We've gone on a few dates and my friend says it's creepy for him to be dating me because he's 31. Is my friend right? He seems like a genuinely good guy.
It's you that's dating this man not your friend.
If he makes you happy then that's all that counts.
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Dunnig Kruger
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Is your friend a dating and romantic advice guru?

Would you go to your postman if you wanted advice on how to do open heart surgery? Or would you go to an experienced surgeon for that?

If you wanted to cook a delicious meal, would you follow your own recipe, or would you follow your friend's recipe?

What are your own views on this particular 31 year old man? You know him better than your friend knows him.
If he makes you happy and you can see that he'd still make you happy in 2 years time, once the honeymoon period is over, you'd be a fool to dump him on your friend's advice.
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username4169146
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you're both grown adults so the main potential problem is your different stages in life. if you want to go out clubbing all the time with flatmates and he's grown out of that then that could be awkward, but if your lifestyles are similar or at least compatible, then there's no problem I can see.
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actualpidgeholt
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Thank you guys for the advice. I'm very new to relationships and he seems really nice. We have quite a bit in common, so I feel like it's gonna be okay.
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username3942526
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I mean you do you
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by actualpidgeholt)
I'm very new to relationships and he seems really nice. We have quite a bit in common
this is a big "red flag" - he has a lot more life and relationship experience - which means you are at a disadvantage for every interaction you have with him
sorry to be so blunt
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coco0
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You should go for it, if you think he's a good guy. But be careful he has a lot more life experience and you don't want to just be a young fling that reminds him of his youth. I hope it's not like that. Good Luck.
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Gent2324
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shouldnt really matter what other people think, if you like him then go out with them if you dont then dont? age gap doesnt matter if its legal
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londonmyst
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No, nothing creepy about it- so long as everything is consensual and nothing illegal is going on.
I've always dated older guys, usually with a 15 year + age gap.
When I was 16, I dated a guy in his 50s.
When I ended my last relationship, I was 19 and the ex was in his 40s.
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bones-mccoy
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Nothing wrong, per se, you just need to take into consideration the difference in life experience, particularly as you've never had a relationship before
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MrMusician95
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Weird, especially as you said you are new to relationships. You are in two very different points of your lives.
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dnjsdjdj
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16 with a 50 yr old? love you weren’t dating you were being groomed
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Anonymous #3
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I don't think so if you have similar interests etc. but I'd be a little bit careful. You know, taking it slow and actually getting to know him.
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